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parents not fitting car seat correctly

(26 Posts)
happydazed Sat 22-Feb-14 10:21:15

I just don't understand this , they are lovely people, adore their kids, 2 months and 2 years, but the infant carrier they don't put the straps over the child just put the seatbelt over the seat and only once over the front of the seat not round the back too. Sometimes don't even bother doing that just place it on the seat with no straps. The older child has a forward facing seat with over arm straps and the seat belt should fit through the back of the seat. They just put the seatbelt across the child round her waist. don't bother with the proper straps. sometimes she strapped in but the seatbelt is in front of her or digging into her back which looks so uncomfortable.

I often go to the car with them and I will fit both seats and straps correctly, with them saying oh its okay it's fine like this etc, me saying no i can't let you drive off like this I would worry, it's dangerous etc. yesterday when the older child was in the front like that I said you do realise she will be killed if you have to slam the brakes on. They just blame being in a rush and make out like I am making a fuss.

yesterday was the first time I have seen her just with the belt round her waist but it's never in correctly, and of course a lot of the time I don't see at all.

I think I need to print out some warnings or email them some official advice. They do know how to do them and I make a point of showing them every single time. It's become a kind of joke. I don't want to interfere but it really does worry me. They say when we were young we didn't even have seat
belts and we were fine, and that's their attitude and I have got in a taxi with my own child and no seat so they bring that up. What would you do.

BrandNewIggi Sat 22-Feb-14 10:31:28

They are endangering your dcs lives, but what I really don't understand is why you are letting them. Since you know they do this, it will be as much your responsibility as theirs if they are injured or killed. I am speaking harshly as I think you are buying into their nonsense that it is fine - it is NOT fine, it is illegal and they are being unbelievably irresponsible.
Of course the seats will work fine, until their is an accident and then your children will fly out of the car if not properly restrained. Forget emailing them stuff, tell them they can't drive the dcs anywhere.

cathpip Sat 22-Feb-14 10:32:01

Tell them that unless they strap your children into the car properly and as per the law then they will not be seeing their grandchildren! I know that this could be more expensive on your part if you use them instead of a nursery but better that than dead children......and you would also never forgive yourself.

BrandNewIggi Sat 22-Feb-14 10:35:57

Sorry I'm an idiot, and read this as being your parents, ie the gps. This must be really difficult for you. I would suggest it could be a child protection issue in this case? Is there an advisory body to contact, or the police?

andadietcoke Sat 22-Feb-14 10:39:49

That's awful. Are the car seats compatible with any of the bases? That would make life a lot easier (and safer) for them and their children if they could be persuaded the outlay was worth the convenience and improved safety/stability.

ilovepowerhoop Sat 22-Feb-14 10:39:55

is the OP not the childminder and it is the parents of the children that are not strapping their own children in properly? They are endangering their own childrens lives not the OP's children

ilovepowerhoop Sat 22-Feb-14 10:40:49

could you ring 101 and ask their advice?

slowcomputer Sat 22-Feb-14 10:45:17

Well I'd call the police next time they drive off. I've twice called the police when I've seen babies in the backs of cars in no car seats and they have sent them out to find them. I'd give them one more warning and say that you are under a legal obligation to report this and if they don't strap them in properly in your presence you'll call the police with their numberplate.

Prepare to lose a customer though.....

Yes it's not the OP's children, it's her mindees.

Unfortunately OP I think you have said enough already, they are clearly not listening.

I think I would try once more saying, look, I know I have said this lots of times and I must sound like a terrible bore, but did you realise this is actually illegal?

If you have email contact or could write them a letter you could put a link to some crash test videos on youtube, you could say "I promise not to mention it ever again if you just watch this video". Although I suppose they might just laugh it off and say they'd watched it hmm Showing them on a laptop might be a bit PA but it might well work.

Or you could report them to the police just as/just before they pick up the DCs by registration number blush

Gigondas Sat 22-Feb-14 10:47:44

You are in really tricky position here as you don't want to sour relationship with parents (not clear if you are nanny or cm but if nanny it's more intimate in way so quite hard to have fallout. They presumably aren't entirely daft so are choosing to ignore risks.

you could try printing stuff off but not sure can do any good. Maybe YouTube link to video showing what happens in a crash? Is there anyway that can be easier to for car seats(or leave them in car) as sounds like they are fitting them then using them which is an extra hassle so may be inclined to strap kids in properly,

There is a fine for driver of up to £500 and may affect insurance so that might sharpen their minds.

happydazed Sat 22-Feb-14 11:18:34

sorry yes should have said I'm childminder.

I never let them drive away I always fit both seats correctly myself before I let them leave.

its when they arrive that's the problem! interesting about the fine I'll look into that, I have gone on about this to them so much I'm starting to feel i am interfering too much so needed some other perspectives.

I'm also forever hassling people about big coats and snowsuits in car seats. I suppose I could for information handout to all parents, or just go with the you tube shock approach.

NomDeClavier Sat 22-Feb-14 11:23:21

Are you a nanny or a CM? You mention going with them...

I would just say very firmly each time 'It is not safe or legal, I don't want you to lose your license or the children to die in a crash. It won't take me a minute' and then just do it.

NomDeClavier Sat 22-Feb-14 11:27:53

Ah x-post. In that case your leaflet suggestion might work if you talk about general car safety and the reasons behind it. Otherwise maybe the police is the best option.

notso Sat 22-Feb-14 11:39:19

We had a child who came to nursery regularly in the back of a van. We gave leaflets, Head spoke to the parents, both were ignored. The head contacted the police in the end.

TwittyMcTwitterson Sat 22-Feb-14 14:24:03

Really don't understand why ppl do this. It's not worth it. They will die.

I'm in agreement with others. Call 101 and report them. Just don't expect that the police will actually go to them as they're useless busy. They won't know it's you so don't think you'll lose them as mindees

TheScience Sat 22-Feb-14 15:11:34

Could you ask for your local community support officer to come along at drop off time and give all the parents dropping off some advice about car seats?

HSMMaCM Sat 22-Feb-14 18:57:51

You could save their lives by reporting them

mrswishywashy Sat 22-Feb-14 22:53:27

Surely this is a safe guarding issue and you could call your insurance legal line for advice. Also police non emergency may help with advice. Thing is if there was an accident and child was hurt/killed parents could try to claim from your liability insurance, not sure if there has ever been a test case though. I'd be interested to hear what insurance company legal line said.

TheScience Sat 22-Feb-14 23:16:07

How could the parents claim from the childminder if they have an accident?

mrswishywashy Sun 23-Feb-14 17:41:04

I guess the parents could back track and say that they'd never been told that car seat rules and if the childminder hadn't mentioned anything could be held liable. Probably a long shot but still worth calling insurance legal line.

TheScience Sun 23-Feb-14 17:44:22

I don't think a childminder could be held accountable for not informing their parents of every law that might apply to them.

ilovepowerhoop Sun 23-Feb-14 18:05:16

surely the parents are responsible for their own children in their own car. How on earth could they claim against the childminder?

mrswishywashy Sun 23-Feb-14 19:08:59

Maybe I'm over thinking it however as a maternity nurse parents can claim up to their child's 22nd birthday if they are injured and need full time care. If this situation is not noted down anywhere then some parents may have it in them to claim I did not strap child in correctly and therefore injured in an accident which means I they could hold me liable. At least if I had my concerns about safety recorded through the police, ofsted or insurance then I wouldn't be liable.

HSMMaCM Sun 23-Feb-14 19:26:58

But the CM is strapping the child in properly. It is the parents who are not, in their own car, with their own child, who is not in the care of the CM at the time.

Saying that ... I do have in my policies that when parents are present, they are responsible for their children and not me.

mrswishywashy Sun 23-Feb-14 19:41:24

Maybe a good idea for OP to add this specifically into her policies. It would obviously be worst case scenario. I've know two children to be killed in a RTA and hate to see children not strapped in safely so I wouldn't give up in this case I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened that could have been prevented if they were safely strapped in.

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