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Can you stop before and after school taking over your life? (cm asking)(14 Posts)
I have them 5 days from 7:30am til school then pick up from school and leave at 6pm (though try to resist leaving so a bit later), plus babies during the day. I feel it is starting to impact on time with my dc and my relationship as i never get chance to wind down after my working day because it is straight onto claering up the house, helping with my dcs' homework, bath , bedtime etc. I feel they get the tired me who has had enough by then. Is it just a bad week or time to call it a day?
I felt like this so made a decision to only have school aged children if I cared for the younger sibling during the day. From the start of this school year I have only had 1 afterschool on a Monday & its great.
I lost money but family life has been so much better
Thanks for the reply. The problem is that I look after siblings of those after school children so if I loose those I loose the little ones too! I really feel so confused
Childminding is like any other job so of course it is tiring. When my older daughter complained I gave her the choice ... either childminding and I get to take her to school, collect her and spend all the holidays with me or I get a job and she goes to a childminder instead. Childminding has it downsides but it has worked for me. It's not for everybody so think if you really want to do it. If you can afford not to work then give notice and enjoy looking after your DCs. Or wait for a family who will fit with your life - I have a childminder friend who won't work past 3pm and she has two children who she looks after.
If I were you I would get the children ready before the parents arrive. Shoes and coats on by the door. Then as soon as I open the door I usher them out. Once they are outside the parents are in charge and they can chase them themselves if they wish. The parents know they can ring me later if they wish or if they want to have a cuppa they can make an appointment as in the evenings my children get tired and need putting to bed soon after the last mindees leave.
As a parent who uses a childminder there is an observation I would make.
My childminder makes it very clear that her doors close at 6pm, so as a parent you need to be there before 6pm so you are out of the door by 6.
I gave up school runs, but you do need to be firm about kicking out at 6.
I tried having scholies and felt exactly the same way. It was all just too much for me and I was felt utterly drained every day. I made the decision to only look after under fives and it has made all the difference. I still get tired but I'm not as exhausted as before. I became a childminder so that I could have a better work/life balance so I prefer to keep my numbers low and earn a bit less.
I've just stopped doing after school too. Dd has clubs three afternoons so I was collecting one mindee at 3 every day then having to go back to get dd at 4. Was all v stressful and mindee was meant to be collected at 5 but was often still here at 6. Now just have littler ones who are all picked up by 5 and def won't take on any before/after school again. Also managed to make up shortfall in income by taking one of the little ones an extra day that I couldn't do before when I had before & after school mindee.
I'm doing it the other way round, not having the younger ones (I'm too old for chasing toddlers and changing nappies!) and just having the wraparound & holiday ones. I'm sure there are plenty like me who can fill the gap left by those wishing to concentrate on little ones during the day.
It does mean there will always be other children around when mine are home, but like lovelynanny I gave my DCs the choice of this situation or I get a job elsewhere and they would be the ones going to a CM in the holidays/after school. (I didn't want to make going to a CM seem like a punishment as I'm sure they would have been perfectly happy, but it is a big adjustment for children who have always had at least one parent working at home.)
I'm hoping this will give me a good balance of time on my own to get things done during the day (+ my other PT job working from home!), time at the weekends with the DCs and time earning money with other DCs here after school.
I used to feel exactly like this as I too have babies + schoolies but then a rather lucky change in mindees/parents working hours reduced my day down to 8-5pm. Just an hour less in the evening (& no tea to cook for mindees ) makes a MASSIVE difference & I don't think I could go back to 6pm finish unless I was desperate. The extra half hour in in the morning is a bonus as it means I can get my kids up & dressed first but I'm not as fussed about that & would do a 7:30 again if asked. I would seriously consider approaching parents to see if they can finish earlier as it's been a complete turnaround for me.
Thanks so much for replying. I find them so reassuring and think I do need a change as work/life balance is not in balance at the moment. Mum turned up 20 minutes late tonight with just a flighty apology, then another 5 mins getting kids out. Just feeling totally knackered.
then i hope you charged mum for being late
have huge steep late fees and bet they will stop
have kids all ready in coats/shoes at 5.50/55 and when knock on door, open and
push shuffle kidsout and shut the door
Didn't she text you to say she was going to be late! No excuses with all of modern technology.
Late fee is a must.
I agree with Blondes have them ready & take them to the door with you, usher them out with a goodbye.
I've pretty much stopped doing mornings for schoolies, far too blinking stressful.
I just have a two year old Monday to Wednesday from about 8.15 and pick up my baby mindee at my son's school. Much much easier on me and my children.
I do have a 9 year old who sometimes comes at 6.30 in a morning and my youngest hates it. It really throws him off. He likes routine and doesn't really like me childminding.
I think if I could get another little one in the day I would stop after school minding for all but 1 - the sibling of my baby mindee. They go at 4.15 anyway.
I have said 1 more year at it! Which is now only about 9 months as I'd be finishing in the summer. I've just moved house, from one with a massive conservatory which I used for minding, to one without. My children are 4.7 and 7.10 - growing up fast. And I still have all this baby stuff hanging around.
It is possible to do exactly what you want as it is your business. But you will have to be prepared to make less money. I really don't miss the days of walking 8/9 children to school!
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