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Which type of help?

(6 Posts)
OhThePlacesYoullGo Mon 24-Jun-13 18:42:02

So current situation is:

Fiancé, me and perfect lovely snuggly little DD (3 wks). FutureMIL is being brilliant and is staying with us at the moment to help me look after DD as I have epilepsy and had a pretty rough time of it during my pregnancy. She'll be going back to work next month though. Fiancé will be in final year at med school, I am on maternity leave (so virtually no income).

We will likely need some ongoing help at least for a bit until my medication is sorted out and I hopefully get back to being seizure free. I am not really looking for any major childcare as such, just someone who is around and able to take over should this be necessary. (When I have seizures, I will be very confused and tired afterwards and will likely need to sleep for several hours). It would also be nice to have some help around the house as I am perpetually knackered though again it would be minimal.

Hours would likely be a bit all over the place and depend on Fiancé's clinical attachments. But person helping out could study from home or similar if they wanted, as like I said I'd just need them around as a back up.

Wouldn't mind having someone living in and could offer a nice double bedroom and bathroom. We live in a fairly desirable location, so maybe this could be a bit of a pull? We don't really have a sizeable budget due to financial situation, but would take out a loan if necessary (as don't really have a choice).

What do you think would be the most appropriate option for us and what would be a fair salary for the above role?

YDdraigGoch Mon 24-Jun-13 18:52:39

I think an older, responsible au pair might be what you're looking for.
I wouldn't employ a 17/18 year old, but we had several girls in their early 20s, and one was even medically trained.

OhThePlacesYoullGo Mon 24-Jun-13 18:55:03

Where did you recruit Goch? And how much would you expect to pay?

YDdraigGoch Mon 24-Jun-13 19:07:34

We haven't had an au pair for about 7 years. DDs are teenagers now.
We used a local agency (in Swindon) and used to pay £55 per week, but I expect its gone up a bit since then. All food and board provided free obvs.

My daughter is planning in working as an au pair in France from Sept, before doing a French degree. She has registered with an au pair website.

Au pairing is a great system. I can't recommend it enough. I was one myself about 100 years ago.

We had several lovely girls over about 8 years, and each one soon became part of our family. We are still in touch with most of them, and have visited some of them in their home countries. Some still come and stay with us too.
You just need a spare bedroom, and feel happy welcoming strangers into your house and life. Not that they remain strangers for very long.

ReetPetit Mon 24-Jun-13 19:10:58

i would think an older, retired person, a type of surrogate grandparent who would be happy to help with cleaning etc and should you have a seizure and need help with baby - also accompanying to hospital appointments etc. Or a mum with a child at school who is looking for a bit of part time income?

I would advertise on and see who you can find. Its worth paying the subscription so that you can contact people who view your profile rather than waiting for them to contact you.

I wouldn't think you necessarily need live in help personally and I wouldn't go for someone young with minimal (medical and childcare) experience.

OhThePlacesYoullGo Mon 24-Jun-13 22:15:39

Thank you both. I will look into AuPairs as well as the link. Have to say I really quite like the surrogate grandparent idea, though I expect it would be a lot more expensive.

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