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Never ever employing a nanny again

(108 Posts)
knackeredmother Wed 19-Jun-13 16:56:53

I have already posted in legal but would be grateful for some opinions/help from this board.
I've posted about my nanny a number of times and it's safe to say our relationship has completely broken down now.

We have had a nanny for over 2 years. She is looking to leave in September so we agreed leave verbally on an accrued basis rather than yearly. From April to August she has 5 days leave (works 2 days per week, 5.6 weeks pro rata per year).
She has already taken 4 of her 5 days leave. She has a 2 week holiday booked in August, I have agreed to this despite her not having enough leave.
She then asked for a further week unpaid leave. I said no for a number of reasons. She repeatedly asked, I repeatedly said no.
We are now in a stalemate situation where she has categorically said she is taking the extra week leave despite me saying no.
She initially said she may leave as i wouldnt allow the extra holiday but now is saying 'I (employer) need to decide what to do'. I keep repeating the line that I would like her to carry on working for us but can not give her the extra week, I've already given more than she is entitled to etc.
I get the impression she wants to be sacked so she can go to tribunal for cash and she is receiving advice not to leave.
I can't afford to pay her redundancy and don't see why I should when she is making the situation difficult.
So, the advice I need is can I call this gross misconduct on her part and let her go? Or am I in for an expensive and stressful fight?
Do I need to wait until she actually fails to arrive for work before Ican sack her?
I have no doubt she plans to try and get money out of me as she has stated her intention to leave in September anyway, is blatantly telling me she is taking the time off regardless of what I say. Surely you would just leave early in August if you were in her situation?
Anyway this is stressing me out so much, I feel she is just laughing at us and in law can do whatever she likes - someone please tell me this is not so!
Or just a friendly ear will do I've really had enough now!

scarlettsmummy2 Fri 21-Jun-13 23:59:10

Just watch she doesn't claim constructive dismissal.

scarlettsmummy2 Sat 22-Jun-13 00:01:40

Sorry- didn't read the other posts before posting. Just get everything documented.

camtt Sat 22-Jun-13 10:54:24

I think it's one thing for your NHS employer to say they would work with you to try to find a solution, but a nanny is a sole employee, if she takes additional leave you don't have other employees to do her job. It's not the same situation at all. You don't sound as if you have behaved unreasonably - you agreed to a lot of additional leave which many employers would not have done. I would stick to my guns and argue the case.

Mimishimi Sat 22-Jun-13 11:28:09

Let her take the leave on condition she provides you with formal notice that she is leaving in September. Then don't make her redundant. Let her take her leave and she won't get redundancy pay because you won't fire her.

ConfusedPixie Sun 23-Jun-13 22:44:21

what a twat your nanny is knackered. We're not all like that! Honestly! I end up working on my holiday days for my other family usually!

Have you got a copy of her job ad with the date on it? As the date would be the important bit in proving that she intended to leave anyway.

CharlieCoCo Fri 12-Jul-13 22:59:11

thing is, so shes basically saying if you dont give me the time off i wont show up, so what does she expect you to do for childcare confused. surely the day she doesnt do her job it should be instant sacking (i know it isn't, i mean it should be). the law can be a bitch cant it!

BlackSwan Fri 12-Jul-13 23:13:02

You have to have this hanging over your head until September? She is a worthless bitch and doesn't deserve her job. Drawn to your post because I too cannot stomach another nanny, but that's another story.

NapaCab Sat 13-Jul-13 00:09:14

If she is planning to claim constructive dismissal she is being very poorly advised! If she wins, she will only be awarded whatever earnings she has lost because of your actions. How long would it take her to get another nanny job? A month? Two months? That is all the pay she would be awarded by the tribunal. Either way it would never be enough to be worth her while. She would have to take on legal costs of about £6k at least and she would have to pay that upfront, even if legal costs were eventually awarded to her.

I have no idea where people get this idea that going to tribunal is lucrative. It is barely worth your while if you are a regular employee and the circumstances are not exceptional i.e. no sex / race discrimination.I have been through the system (settled before it got to tribunal) and it is a costly business that is rarely worth the while of the employee. I had a really egregious case, possible sex discrimination, and it still would have been very very difficult and stressful to go to tribunal. It's not a trivial matter. As you are an individual employing one person too, OP, the tribunal would most likely be in your favor as they are more sympathetic to smaller employers with few resources.

If she threatens you with some letter about constructive dismissal, OP, just brazen it out and act as if you are totally happy to go all the way to tribunal if needs be. Also make it clear you have plenty of access to legal advice. She's probably hoping to extort a bit of cash from you with a letter threatening tribunal, but believe me, she wouldn't have much of a case that any employment lawyer would bother with.

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