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Nannies with their own child? pros and cons......

(18 Posts)
zoej Sat 27-May-06 15:55:21

Nannies with their own child?
What are the pro's and cons?
Has anyone any experience of using a Nanny who brings their own child to work?
Do they still expect to be paid the going rate or do they get paid slighly less due to the fact they are sharing the care between their own child and my children? Also I guess they are effectively saving themselves chldcare costs of their own?

zoe

bluebear Sun 28-May-06 00:06:41

Hi Zoe,
I have a nanny who brings her own child with her - he's a baby at the moment (9 months), and my children love to help her with him (mine are 2 and 4). We also share our nanny with another family who have a 1 year old (my 4 year old is at school and most days I am at home by 3pm so she doesn't tend to have all of them at the same time).
When she worked solely for us, and brought her own baby we paid her at about two-thirds of the going-rate..we cover all food and expenses for her and her baby, and I have provided things like double buggy, highchair etc.
If you search the archives you'll find similar posts to yours - and opinion seems to be divided between whether they should get the going rate or not - I think it's a personal decision between you and the nanny to be honest - our nanny didn't want to work for a family that she didn't already know - and we particularly wanted to employ her because we already knew how well she got on with our children, she expected to earn less than she would get if she didn't bring her son, and we were honest with how much we could afford to pay her.
Since we have found another family to share her with, her salary has increased and she is now earning about 90% of the 'going rate'. She says she's happy, we are definately happy, dd is over the moon as she gets the benefit of an instant baby brother.
We haven't experienced any 'cons' yet...but we are thinking of buying a bigger car so that they can all fit in if they need to be taken somewhere at the same time (hasn't happened yet, but it may do) so that may be a 'hidden expense', but the new car is also partly so we can take ds, dd and their friends out for the day, or get grandparents in as well as all of us.

thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat Sun 28-May-06 00:32:38

we had a nanny with her own child - she was same age as dd2. dd1 was at achool - it worked really well - playmate for dd2 - being same age was good - meant it was easy to take them to same activities. paid her a bit less than going rate - she was qualified and has a lot of experience, and good refs, but probably got paid same as someone qualified with only a bit pf experience, or unqualified with a lot. One of the disappointing things is that because she didn;t live that close to us, when her dd started school it wasn't the same school, so the whole thing became impractical - whihc was a real shame as we would have liked to keep her

Journey2 Sun 28-May-06 08:15:24

I have just returned to the UK after some time abroad and my last job was to Nanny for a 2 yr old and 4 yr old. My child was in between.
The greatest Pro, for both myself and employer was that our children could make a friend, and it was a good bond between them.
I chose to take a reduction in pay when giving my rate, because I liked the family so much and I did have my child, but I was entitled to ask for the going rate as Qualified Western Nannies were rare where I happened to be.
The only con I can think of is when my charges were ill very often mine would get it too.. but we came to a good arrangement, to phone each other if a child was ill to give one another the opportunity to decide whether I should come over or not.
I worked for several families before them, and I remember one family, I never got to the interview stage as Mum decided someone with their own child was bound to favour their own child over their own and what would happen if my child and her child should be in accident, what would happen? As I said to my agent who agreed with me (a) a professional Nanny with own child is just that, professional, and not going to give more attention to their own child.. infact it's a great way to teach ones child they are not the centre of the universe! (b) regarding any accident, again as a professional, if both children were involved, then as a first aider one deals with the child who requires the medical assistance the greatest first.
It is an option (nanny with child) that is not worth ruling out straight away. It worked for me successfully several times and I have just deposited a cheque to my child for his part in letting me work the way I did!

zoej Sun 28-May-06 10:59:08

That is really reasuring to know that it can work well, and it have a nannies point of view. I think I would definatly considerate it if the nanny had a similar stance to Journey2.

I think the logisitics are fine all the while her own charge is not going to different schools (i.e pre-school) and I will definatly consider this option know.

FloatingOnTheMed Sun 28-May-06 11:01:05

my friend who's a nanny (no child of her own yet) thinks that she might even favour the other children and her own child might lose out!

FloatingOnTheMed Sun 28-May-06 11:02:09

sorry i don't mean "favour" as in love them more, i mean be more present to them, their needs taking preference over her own child's if that makes sense.

Blu Sun 28-May-06 11:48:30

Our nanny had a child exactly the same age as DS, and it worked out brilliantly. he had a constant playmate (they really loved each other), and she could take them to the same age-appropriate activities.
We did pay less, since she was also her own chid-care - but she suggested the rate and never showed signs of being anything other than happy.
She was pleased to have another child with her DS and thought it was good for him. They did both learn excellent social skills very early - taking turns, playing together, talking etc.

wanderingstar Sun 28-May-06 13:43:18

No personal experience, but a friend who's a single mum had the same much loved nanny for 6 years, the final 3 of which she brought along first her daughter then her son. It worked very well for them until nanny's dd started school. They carried on for a few more months but the logistics got too much. However they parted on good terms, and friend's dd (only child) really benefitted from having a liitle girl close to her age to play with (and a little boy for a while too !).
My friend would say it was a great plan while nanny's children are not yet in full time education. I know nanny took a pay cut but not sure of the %.

thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat Sun 28-May-06 15:58:54

I agree floating - I see that in myself if I;ve got othre kids around - definitely look out more for the ones that aren't mine, definitely more likely to bollock mine for not taking turns etc.

goldenoldie Sun 28-May-06 16:45:51

Could work out very well if the kids get on together, but what happens if they don't? Then you have got a really difficult situation on your hands. All children fall out from time to time, and it could be just more stress on your plate trying to deal with it.

And I seem to remember someone in a similar thread said 'in the event of a fire/running out into road/any emergency/dangerous situation - which child do you think nanny would grab first, yours, or their's?'.

But, it is a cheaper way of employing a nanny, a discount is reasonable as they are saving on childcare themselves, and don't forget all the extra food/snacks, and wear and tear on your home/toys/equipment that having nanny's child in the house will incur.

zoej Sun 28-May-06 17:42:03

I think my biggest stummbling block will be that I already have 3 children, one being at school, but the added factor of a extra child (4th)? May be too much?

I get the idea the parents with experience have 1 or 2 of their own plus the nannies child as a playmate. Does anyone have expereince of 3 of their own plus a nanny with child?

I am not too fussed about wear and tear - a 4th child isn't going to make too much impact on what the other 3 have already done! as for the food - I guess you factor that in to the wage you agree on?

thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat Sun 28-May-06 20:01:02

I think feasibility of 4 might depend on ages. If 2 are the same then - logistically - that's not much diff to having 3 iyswim. there are quite a few mn mums with 4 and I guess they manage. rather them than me. would it be full-time? are some of yours at school? does she drive? I think all those things might make a difference. We put the food thing into the contract - her dd had lunch and tea with us and she had lunch - tbh it makes very little difference

lottiesmummy Sun 28-May-06 22:27:55

I was a nanny 3 yrs ago taking my 2 yr old with me, it worked well for a while till the parents thought I was favouring my child over theirs, ended up loosing the job whilst pregnnat with my 2nd, they blamed my 3 yr old for this saying she ws bullying their kids, wasnt nice, it can work though as I had a job B4 that with DD and it was great, depends on kids ages really

bubble99 Sun 28-May-06 22:38:11

Not quite the same thing - but similar in some ways...We are nursery owners and at the moment employ two staff who bring their children to work. We pay them full salaries with their childcare places. I think we are the exception as most nurseries will offer a percentage off of nursery fees. TBH, and as previous posters have found, we feel it is a cost worth absorbing as they are excellent at their jobs and their children fit in perfectly. In both cases the children are in different age groups to their mums and so are not in the same groups as them at the moment, although they will be as they get older. We haven't had any real problems with the parents giving more attention to their own children at the expense of the others, though we are aware that a parent will (naturally) 'look out' for their own child first.

TBH, we are happy to have found such fantastic people to work with.

bluebear Sun 28-May-06 22:39:45

Our nanny has between 1 and 4 children to look after depending on the day and whether it is school hols - but she comes from a nursery nurse background and is not at all daunted, so I think a lot of it depends on the nanny and their abilities. It probably is easier if at least some of the children are similar in age though.
Our 'guideline' was the ofsted ratio used for childminding, 3 pre-schoolers of which 1 can be under 1yr, and up to a total of 6 including school age, I think (obviously, we only have a total of 4)...if you want your nanny to have insurance then they need to be within the ofsted ratio too.

thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat Mon 29-May-06 00:27:20

bubble - that's great - I would have thought that the benefit of having parents as nursery workers - bit older and wiser and helpful to the parents would really mark your nursery out. And its a conundrum that has often bothered me, - the lowish level of wages for childcare jobs, the desire of parents to keep costs reasonable, the difficulty of keeping people in work when they have their own families etc etc . well done you.

madchad Tue 30-May-06 12:42:04

I am about to have 3 under 3.5 (the almost 3.5 year old has started preschool 08.30-15.30), and we have just got a nanny.

When advertising, I first thought I would have no problem if nanny has say one child, and in fact thought it would be good for the 2year old,
but rethought this because, depending on age of their child, couldn't get over:

1. Needs of all kids if nanny child is at school: co-ordinating school runs could mean endless time for the youngest in cars, how does their child cope without contemporaries in school hols?

2. Safety issues: how do you walk 4 kids under 5 anywhere? (Please God I will never know). Two in the double pushchair is okay, but how can you watch/hold the other two and push?.Tricky with three as it is, I'm going to use the sling, and have always reins in the pocket just in case!
This was the clincher for me.

3. Would need a new car/nanny must have 7 seater or else 1 kid has to be in the front seat.

Perhaps not a problem if my kids were older and not as close in age, and we had a bigger car.

Reminds me to post about best car for 3 under 3.3.....

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