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Sacking a new nanny...

(22 Posts)
Trying2bMindful Sun 28-Apr-13 01:28:51

Our nanny started v recently but due to a number of issues we no longer trust her with our baby. So we need to sack her.....
Any tips?

LittleMissLucy Sun 28-Apr-13 01:46:29

Just do it. We had to do it after a few weeks because our new nanny shouted at me when our 1st DC was maybe 2 or 3 wks old.

I just printed out a formal letter and at the end of the day said " I think you'll agree things haven't quite worked out here, so here's your formal letter and you'll of course get paid notice"

And I had a friend in the house because I was nervous. But I had also given the nanny agency the heads up so they could call her and forewarn her, so it wasn't a shock.

Can you do any of these things?

Be sure she's paid off, or has the promise of it, then you're less likely to get a noisy exit!

Trying2bMindful Sun 28-Apr-13 08:32:10

Thanks Little. We didn't use an agency so are on our own but DH & I will do it together. As she has been here so little time we were hoping to avoid paying her off but will keep that option as a back up.
I'm nervous about the security at home as she has a key....

nannynick Sun 28-Apr-13 08:59:08

Do you have a probationary period in the contract.

Do any of the thing done fall under what is written in the Gross Misconduct section of the contract.

Paying notice is to end things quickly. You could take the key off them and send them home.
Need to be careful about Wrongful Dismissal. You need to be fair.
If you are not in the UK then look at what employment laws apply in your country.

hermioneweasley Sun 28-Apr-13 09:02:48

You need to pay the notice she's entitled to, which will depend on her contract

drinkyourmilk Sun 28-Apr-13 11:39:03

As a nanny I would appreciate honesty. Tell her why and then what you are going to do and what you expect of her.
So if its gross misconduct then instant dismissal and return of key on the spot.
Alternatively she can either work notice or have notice paid but not work, again key returned on spot.
Just make sure its all legal.

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 28-Apr-13 18:34:28

depending on what your contract says regarding notice and any probation period depends on if you need to pay notice or can get rid of for gross misconduct

whats issues have happened?

Trying2bMindful Sun 28-Apr-13 22:29:30

The contract had been reviewed by both of us but was waiting to be signed, subject to review by a lawyer. The lawyer had come back to me and we were going to add a probation period prior to signing, but had not yet done so. Thus we are in a grey area I believe....
It wasn't working for a number of reasons, details of which I won't post here in case she is on here too! It isn't fair to air it. Suffice to say over the period she was terrible at communicating, didnt listen to me, lied to me, seemed disinterested, ignored important parts of the unsigned contract re our rules and when we raised these issues got defensive and refused to discuss them. Unfortunately we no longer trusted her so she had to go. We couldn't go to work leaving our baby with someone we didn't trust.
I wish her well but I would not recommend her although I am willing to accept she might be perfect for some mums, just not for me!. Unfortunately her behavior now sheds light on some of the comments made by her referees, which at the time seemed fine but take on a different meaning once there is context to place them in.
My husband tells me I will have to refuse to give a reference if I am asked as I cannot give a bad one and so honesty is not the best policy.....

We have done the deed. It went surprisingly smoothly but she didn't ask any questions so I feel a little uneasy about it being a clean break. I wonder if she will have questions tomorrow..... In the meantime we have changed the locks.
Thanks for the advice guys.

blueshoes Sun 28-Apr-13 22:53:55

There are no rights of unfair dismissal if she has worked for you for less than a year (barring discrimination). If you have raised those issues before but no improvement, I would just pay her off to get rid quickly.

OutragedFromLeeds Mon 29-Apr-13 00:33:42

Is she coming tomorrow to work?!

LittleMissLucy Mon 29-Apr-13 01:33:47

Well done. Agree that she needs paying off. Wouldn't be surprised if this weren't the first time this has happened to her, also wouldn't be surprised if she was the nanny we had to let go (no reference was ever requested).

Trying2bMindful Mon 29-Apr-13 22:06:45

Where are you based Little? It would be weird if this was the same nanny!

He was so much happier today so I'm pleased with the outcome. I felt quite relieved in the office too. Phew.

LittleMissLucy Tue 30-Apr-13 00:33:59

Well it happened to us when we lived in Fulham - but she was all over the South East. I should have known, because there were lots of patches in her CV that were "between" jobs. I think she was fired a lot and paid off quite well and took benefits until the next job. She actually dazzled us on her interview, but then she knew exactly what to say to first time parents (as we were at the time). It'd be nice to think there was only one nanny out there doing this, but there may well be more, of course.

SuperDuperJezebel Tue 30-Apr-13 09:31:50

I wonder if its the nanny I know of who seems to change jobs like I change clothes, LML?!

blueshoes Tue 30-Apr-13 09:34:33

Trying2b, did you talk to her referees or just rely on a sheet of paper? I hire aupairs (not the same as nannies, I know) but I always insist on speaking to referees on the phone. You might find you get more information out that way. I have a killer question at the end: if your circumstances were the same, would you hire her again?

Strix Tue 30-Apr-13 12:45:41

I think it is common pratice to write a very short and factualy reference, and leave your contact details. When/if someone contacts you, you can tell the unabridged truth (if you want to).

Something like:

"Susie Q worked for me as a full time nanny from x to x, 2013. If you have any questions feel free to contact me on..."

Trying2bMindful Thu 02-May-13 00:16:53

I did talk to the refs but unfortunately when you find the best out of a bad bunch & you really want to hire them you hear what you want to hear. & as a first timer you are at a disadvantage because you have no clue about how your life is about to change!
I did ask the same killer question.... They all said something about their situation being different now so they would be looking for something different. DOH. Should have been a warning to me but I just didn't heed it.
Next time....

Trying2bMindful Thu 02-May-13 00:18:31

Sadly Little there is more than 1. She worked for the same family for years, since she arrived in the UK.

LittleMissLucy Thu 02-May-13 00:55:39

Well you know at least that your super senses will be working if you ever meet another possible nanny for your child, having gone through this. And at least you have nipped it in the bud. That's two positives!

LadyHarrietdeSpook Thu 02-May-13 11:33:21

Don't beat yourself up about it. Hindsight is a beautiful thing...

WouldBeHarrietVane Thu 02-May-13 21:51:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Trying2bMindful Sat 11-May-13 00:57:00

Thx for the support ladies. New CM is working out wonderfully. Psyching myself up for sorting out a new nanny!!!

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