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Working with Parents - Some advice please

(9 Posts)
MUM2BLESS Wed 10-Apr-13 20:23:32

I deal with quite a few families.

One is not keen on her little one watching tv, as limited at home, one wants 20 mins only, whilst some never mentioned it.

Some times parents may want you to do or not to do certain things with their children, how do you respect their wishes when it may not also be possible as you are dealing with other children too.

I have to think about my kids as well as the other kids.

The new one is settling in and mum does not want me to take him to the park as yet. What about the other children?

Should I explain to mum that I have to also meet the needs of the other kids too. I am thinking about letting mum know what my routine is like when I take on the other kids who return next week.


HSMMaCM Wed 10-Apr-13 20:33:01

I make it clear when parents first meet me. They make a decision whether their children come to me, based on the service I offer. I am happy to work with them on sleep routines, etc, but I decide how often we go out and where.

Thurlow Wed 10-Apr-13 20:36:04

Hmm - as someone who uses a CM, I generally expect the telly to be off most of the time anyway, especially when it is only the very little children. However I do appreciate that it might be on sometimes for the older children. Our CM seems to have it on in the background in the morning, but she only has the older (6-9yo) kids for half an hour or so before going to school, so I can see that it is difficult to get them to do much of any other activity in so short a time. Your OP sounds a bit like you are going to have the TV on more, or was that just wording?

The park issue is a bit U of the new mum, I think. If you use a CM then you are choosing to use childcare that generally includes a school run, and/or the need to take the children out of the house for activities (such as ones that nurseries might have onsite).

I know this isn't a CM's opinion, but I would explain that the other kids have needs too, and ask if there is a compromise - if the new mindee is young, can they stay in their pushchair for the first week or so? As a mum I'd find that perfectly acceptable, but I get the impression that this mum might not?

Brownowlahi Wed 10-Apr-13 20:40:17

I think it's fair enough parents giving their views about things like sleep times and food preferences, but I'm not sure as a cm I would be happy for parents to dictate where I can visit with their children. Also if I was another parent at your setting I might not be to happy to know children weren't being taken to places they regularly enjoy (like the park) because one parent doesn't want them to go. Why doesn't she want the child to go the park?

MsDeerheart Wed 10-Apr-13 21:15:43

Hmm as a parent - TV I can see the point to a certain extent - although I think its fair enough to have it on with school age children
Visiting the park - that's odd

MUM2BLESS Wed 10-Apr-13 23:15:13

HSMMaCM - your right, this should be made clear to start with. The little one is the only cm child during the hols at present. I think I will let the mum know that I have to also consider the needs to the other children too. I think it would be unfair to take the little one to the park and keep him in the buggy.

Thurlow - during the hols my kids are with me. They like to watch tv which I allow. During the term time I do not have the tv on for long with the under school age children. I choose programmes which I believe are educational. Ie something special and Mr Maker for example.

Brownowlahi - the mum does not really know me as yet, therefore is not really comfortable with me taking the little one to the park. To be honest I should have asked why. Not sure if any accident took place at the park.


I think I will let mum know the ages of the kids I am dealing with and also what my daily routine is. I want to take into consideration the parents request but I will not do this at the risk of not providing for the needs of the other children.

LemonBreeland Wed 10-Apr-13 23:24:52

The Mum not trusting you to to take her child to the park is ridiculous, as she is trusting you to look after him.

TV inholidwys for your dc is fair enough if that is whwt you like to do, however it would be better if it was elsewhere, maybe upstairs. I wouldn't be happy if my cmer had the tv on a lot.

MUM2BLESS Wed 10-Apr-13 23:27:26

MsDeerheart - sorry I wanted to reply to you also. Yes I agree with the tv bit but will check out the park bit. I am careful now to ensure that I only agree to the parents request if it does not compromise the service I need to give to the other kids or parents.

Thank you for your time .

MUM2BLESS Wed 10-Apr-13 23:31:56

LeomonBreeland. All my kids are school aged. The youngest is 8. Got four.

Next week its all back to normal. Limited tv. I am not one for just leaving cm kids in front of the tv. I visit the library quite regularly.

Thanks. You have given me something to think about.

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