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Poorly child

(170 Posts)
ifmamaainthappy Wed 20-Mar-13 13:49:09

Child is 14 months, has a cold, just generally not happy, contacted Mom to let her know, that she's not herself, Mom has told me she's got to much to do to collect her at the moment??? What do you do??? i can't just sit cuddling all day, have others to look after, ( i'm having a late lunch and 5 minutes right now!!)

Twinklestarstwinklestars Wed 20-Mar-13 14:02:57

Did you say she needs to collect or just that she wasn't her self? Don't give the option of not collecting, I've toughened up now after a grandma wouldn't collect a child with a temp of over 40 and a history of fitting!

woahthere Wed 20-Mar-13 14:05:14

Have you a baby carrier or sling you can pop child in so you can get a few things done and give cuddle? I know its not ideal and Mum is being an arse, but unless youre prepared to get properly shirty with her and justify it you havent got much choice apart from to put it down to a bad day. After that though you might want to have a think about whether this is a good working relationship or not. If its a one off I would let it go, but if Mum is like this in general then have a word.

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 20-Mar-13 14:07:49

I wouldn't call a parent home from work because a child had a cold and wasn't happy!

Is that standard practice for childminders?

ceeveebee Wed 20-Mar-13 14:10:24

I wouldn't expect a childminder to ask me to collect a child just because of a cold and "not being happy". I assume the Mum is working so can't just drop everything for a non emergency

ifmamaainthappy Wed 20-Mar-13 14:16:26

The child is normally really happy, Has been crying all day, not eating, and have found out slept most of yesterday, Mom and Dad are both full of cold and told me they feel awful (as in not well!!) I'm not paid to nurse children, i have others to look after... A sick child should be with their parent's!!

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 20-Mar-13 14:18:33

Bearing in mind the number of colds and stuff children get, that makes you very unreliable childcare.

ifmamaainthappy Wed 20-Mar-13 14:22:19

Outraged, no Not at all, i never send children home unless they are ill, The fact the child has not stopped crying all day is not good for the baby or the other children.. I wouldn't want any of my children to be with anyone else other than me if they were crying all day!!!

minderjinx Wed 20-Mar-13 14:53:50

I don't think that's fair, Outraged. You pay a childminder for shared care, not exclusive care. You take on board that she needs to balance the needs of all the children in her care. So you take the chance that if or when your child is poorly enough to need constant one to one attention, that it will have to be you who provides that. It's just not fair on the child, the childminder or any other children there to try to keep a sick child happy when they really need a parent for comfort. I also think most parents would want to be there for their baby in these circumstances.

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 20-Mar-13 14:58:22

...but the child has a cold? If it was throwing up or running a dangerously high temperature, fair enough, but to leave work and come home immediately because the child has a cold and is unhappy?

I respect your right to run your business how you see fit, but I can see why this would be a problem for the parents.

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 20-Mar-13 15:37:37

i agree with leeds, she has a cold and grumpy - not a reason i would call my boss and say come home

she is not throwing up or has high temp (both of which parents should collect)

yes you are a cm and not a nanny, but does it say in your sickness policy that if has a cold/unhappy that parents will collect

yes you have others to look after,assuming 2 others if have 3 under 5, but sounds no different to my day if have one charge under the weather/teething etc and they need a bit more tlc - the other 2 have to understand it

ifmamaainthappy Wed 20-Mar-13 15:58:48

Mom and Dad are both full of cold and told me they feel awful (as in not well!!) Seems to have been missed here.. if the child feel's the same as mom or Dad, as it is we have worked through it, although the child clearly would have been better with it's parent's, And i am a very very competent and caring CM, with the childs welfare being paramount in all i do.

ifmamaainthappy Wed 20-Mar-13 16:05:08

And i have also informed mom the child has not eaten hardly anything but more importantly not drinking enough i have only had 1 very slightly wet nappy since 7.45 this morning, surely that would be cause for concern.

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 20-Mar-13 16:16:50

'surely that would be cause for concern'

and who better to care for the child than a professional, qualified, first-aid trained childminder?

That's why parents pay you instead of using an au pair or teenager. You can deal with this sort of situation. You say you've worked through it now, so it was doable and neither parent has to walk out of work!

Oh and I saw this bit 'Mom and Dad are both full of cold and told me they feel awful (as in not well!!)', but my thought was, if they're well enough to go to work then the baby, who has the same cold, is well enough to go to childcare.

ifmamaainthappy Wed 20-Mar-13 16:19:44

Outraged, i do not agree with you but will leave it there!!

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 20-Mar-13 16:22:29

Fair enough grin

ReetPetit Wed 20-Mar-13 16:22:58

op, i feel your pain. some parents are extremely self centred where childminders (and their children are concerned) I would be sending home too. My job is not looking after ill children. Ill children should be at home with their parents.
A nursery would send home - why shouldn't we?

Don't worry about Outraged, she has a bit of a chip on her shoulder about childcare it would seem hmm

ReetPetit Wed 20-Mar-13 16:25:24

outraged, you have a very selfish attitude - don't you think it matters that op, her children and other children in her care are now likely to get ill - resulting in another set/sets of parents being unable to go to work and op losing income as her children will not be able to go to school?! You have to think about the knock on effect.

We are not nannies. We are childminders. We work from our own home, are self employed and therefore set our own terms, including whether or not we chose to care for sick children. We have more than one set of parents to consider.

ifmamaainthappy Wed 20-Mar-13 17:28:08

Thank you ReetPetit, sometimes i'm amazed on here about attitudes, but then there are others like yourself that make it all worthwhile.. flowers

ReetPetit Wed 20-Mar-13 18:00:39

thankyou ifmama smile
there are some very odd people on here, that's for sure.

I've worked with children nearly 20 years and since being a childminder have been appalled at the way some parents think the can treat us! they are leaving their most treasured possessions with us but yet squabble over the odd pound or two and think its fine to leave ill children in our care and not pay on time...
all in all i have had enough and hope to give up this year.

did mum collect btw? was she at work orhome ill? i would have been inclined to deliver child to her but obviously that's nother fair on other children....

ReetPetit Wed 20-Mar-13 18:01:09

sorry about spelling - on phone

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere Wed 20-Mar-13 18:46:21

OP, I agree with you 100%. If the child is ill, even if not with a raised temp or D&V then he or she should be at home. A cold can make someone feel bloody awful and home is the best place.

I suggest you firstly ignore peculiar opinions on this thread, then have a look at your Exclusion policy regarding illnesses and then be firmer next time you need to ring a parent for them to fetch their poorly child. You are a childcare provider not a nurse. If mum was too busy to collect, then dad could have (if all is well there) or the emergency contact person.

Hope you are ok.

(BTW, it boggles my mind that someone would rather leave their child in childcare than collect them if they were ill.)

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 20-Mar-13 19:02:43

There are downsides to all forms of childcare. One of the downsides of using a nusery or childminder is that they are unable to look after a child who is ill.

I am suprised that a cold is considered serious enough to call the parents home from work. I imagine if schools and nurseries used that policy they would be half empty from September to March.

I am confused that you seem unable to understand that a parent cannot drop everything at work to rush home when there isn't a serious problem.

I respect your right to run your childcare business as you see fit.

I hope we can discuss issues of this nature without resorting to personal insults.

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 20-Mar-13 19:07:47

alliwant I don't think there are many parents who want to leave their sick child in childcare, but it is not always possible to leave immediately and collect.

If the mum is a teacher for example, she can't just leave her class and come home because her DC has a cold....

or if she is a judge or lawyer and in court....

or a doctor in the middle of seeing a patient....

Some people have demanding jobs, which is why they use professional childcarers who can deal with illnesses/accidents etc. Perhaps these parents are better off with a nanny, but I'm not sure it's a good advert for childminders.

AllDirections Wed 20-Mar-13 19:13:54

But there is a cold as in lots of sneezing and a snotty nose and then there is a full blown cold that gives you a thick head and makes you all achy and feel terrible. It sounds like this child has the full blown variety.

If my childminder thought my child was ill enough to phone me at work then I'd trust her judgement and collect the child asap. I trust my childminder 100%

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