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Not entirely happy with CM...WWYD?

(32 Posts)
banana87 Fri 21-Dec-12 23:04:45

I don't really know if I am making something out of nothing here.

I have a CM one day per week only. We have 2 children ages 1 and 4.

My 4 year old reports to me that CM has the TV on all day (she often will also tell me everything she has watched---usually movies). Last week she told me that they "went to the shops for a long long time", which I assume meant they went Christmas shopping. When I drop off the TV is very often on, as well as when I pick up. Today when I received my invoice, she had invoiced for a soft play visit last week that I am 90% sure did not happen because my 4 year old did not mention it at all (she ALWAYS tells me where they went). Today CM took my kids along to the dentist for her kids--which I assume meant that my 2 spent near 30 minutes in a waiting room.

I do not know if I am being ridiculous or not. Should I expect the CM to go about her daily activities (i.e. shopping and dental appointments) and TV being used regularly? My kids seem very happy there but something in my gut is nagging me that its just not right....

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 23-Dec-12 15:24:02

My ex dc then 5yrs always said he did nothing at school - I would say did you do reading / writing / spelling / maths / drawing etc and always said no but I knew he had done some of those things

Did think cm's had a diary each day to fill in for ofsted regulations

OutragedFromLeeds Sun 23-Dec-12 15:28:01

One of my DC's also tells me he did nothing at school, which I assume isn't true.

The OP's daughter isn't telling her she did 'nothing' though is she, she's telling her they watched TV and she's telling her what they watched. So it's not just a case of saying 'nothing' she must be actively making up a load of programs/movies that they've watched which is completely different to saying 'nothing'.

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 23-Dec-12 17:39:01

I meant that yes maybe the tv is on and perhaps the op dd is watching it but also say playing with toys or colouring or reading books

Hopefully she isn't watching tv all day and nothing else (apart from soft play) but guess unless op suddenly arrives at cm she won't ever know

OutragedFromLeeds Sun 23-Dec-12 17:51:03

That wasn't to you blondes, to everyone comparing it to children who say 'nothing' when asked what they've done at school/nursery/childminders.

tbh though I would be really unhappy with a childminder who had the TV on while my DC were playing with toys/colouring/reading books. A bit of tv for quiet time/after school - fine, TV on all day long as background noise - I'm looking for another childminder.

JellyMould Sun 23-Dec-12 20:17:29

A bit of cbeebies is one thing. Spider-Man films and films that are scaring the children is quite another. I'd be concerned.

orchidee Sun 23-Dec-12 20:34:24

I think you should trust your gut instinct. As you say, you only use the CM one day a week so you can compare your children's stories and actions.

Oh and about the TV- that's definitely inappropriate for a 1yo, research has shown that any TV before age 2 is inappropriate and the Spiderman films etc are a very poor choice. A youngster can't follow the fast scene changes in this sort of programme and it's confusing and scary for them. If TV is to be shown it should definitely be the sort of thing that's designed with babies and toddlers in mind.

As an aside, my local softplay lets CMs and their mindees in free one day per week. Any additional expense billed to you should be approved beforehand so let her know that's what you expect- approval before and a receipt after.

Do you think your CM enjoys her job? She seems to be doing the bare minimum.

DontmindifIdo Sun 23-Dec-12 20:48:07

Trust your gut, a spiderman film is hardly suitable for those ages - even if she has older DCs she's looking after/are her own, it's not acceptable for your 1 and 4 year olds.

Get a new CM. If you aren't happy, you aren't happy.

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