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Au Pair Angst going on upstairs - I am wearing my judgy pants

(37 Posts)
NormaStanleyFletcher Wed 12-Dec-12 21:39:37

A neighbours Au Pair has come to see mine. She is under 18 years old, has been here just over a week, and is being expected to look after a 2 year old and a 5 year old. The 5 year old from 8-9 and from 3.15-5, but the 2 year old ALL DAY. Plus cleaning. for 60 quid a week. She is leaving as she is getting criticised for her work.

They are havvin a larf.

They should be paying a nanny for that kind of hours.

Shouldn't they?

My au pair does get up, drop off and pick up, simple cooking or re-heating 3-4 days a week. Usually 3 days a week. I pay 90. I am flexible, she is flexible. She does not do much cleaning.

NormaStanleyFletcher Wed 12-Dec-12 21:40:58

Oh and if you are the mum and you happen to be a MNer, I think YABU expecting that much of an au pair. Sorry, but I do

Welovecouscous Wed 12-Dec-12 21:41:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RandomMess Wed 12-Dec-12 21:42:18

Sounds like a nanny role to me, are the parents out at work all day?

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Wed 12-Dec-12 21:42:55

Yes, she is being taken for a ride. Poor kid.

NormaStanleyFletcher Wed 12-Dec-12 21:44:00

The parents are out at work all day, yes

NormaStanleyFletcher Wed 12-Dec-12 21:53:12

Poor girl has told them that when she goes back for Christmas she will not be returning, but she has already bought her return ticket for 4th Jan, and so is looking for another more reasonable family in the new year.

OutragedFromLeeds Wed 12-Dec-12 22:00:13

Maybe you could link her up with Newtothisstuff? She's looking for a new au pair (on the lazy au pair thread).

NormaStanleyFletcher Wed 12-Dec-12 22:04:34

She wants to stay near oxford. Will look for lazy au pair thread - thank you

NormaStanleyFletcher Wed 12-Dec-12 22:12:09

Oh - and she can't drive - so no good Newtothisstuff

Newtothisstuff Wed 12-Dec-12 22:37:21

I'm looking for one a bit older too.. Thanks tho.. The family are being vu tho your right

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 12-Dec-12 22:43:20

Poor girl sad she is certainly being taken for a ride and very unfair

The mum obv wants cheap childcare - for a nanny Doing all those hours that would cost the mum at least 6 times that if not nearer 9 or 10 by the time she's calculated a gross wage

Hope the ap Finds a nice family that won't exploit her asap

NormaStanleyFletcher Wed 12-Dec-12 22:46:59

I would take her on - my au pair is leaving at Christmas, but I already have another Spanish girl lined up.

She has raised the rate with the mum, who has just told her it is all they can afford.

MrAnchovy Thu 13-Dec-12 00:12:51

Outrageous exploitation but unfortunately not unusual. Can you make a point to your neighbour by offering the AP somewhere to stay when she comes back?

NormaStanleyFletcher Thu 13-Dec-12 08:10:49

Unfortunately not. We have no room at all.

searching4serenity Thu 13-Dec-12 08:14:30

Is that legal??!Those hours for that money?

I feel really sorry for the AP. This must be your neighbours 1st au pair?

fraktion Thu 13-Dec-12 09:02:06

That's ridiculous. The family are economising (dangerously) and whilst it's technically legal it's exploitative and shouldn't be. They need a nanny.

Poor girl sad

browniebearscuddlychristmas Thu 13-Dec-12 09:11:47

I pay my childminder more than that for less hours

NormaStanleyFletcher Thu 13-Dec-12 09:37:34

It is not their first au pair. The last one left a couple of weeks ago because she was so unhappy with the arrangement.

Brownie, au pairs will pretty much always get less than childminders, as they get housed and fed on top.

wewereherefirst Thu 13-Dec-12 09:42:01

That is pure exploitation!

LadyHarrietdeSpook Thu 13-Dec-12 11:08:59

The poor two year old! "Dangerously economising" is right.

I wonder what they tell people the terms are before they arrive. THey won't get anyone to stay for longer than five minutes. Seriously I really worry about those children.

poopnscoop Thu 13-Dec-12 11:22:09

'I pay my childminder more than that for less hours'

One cannot compare the service a childminder and an aupair provides at all.

Poor girl, I hope she finds another family who appreciate (and pay!) her properly.

NormaStanleyFletcher Thu 13-Dec-12 14:05:20

Neighbours au pair has asked my au pair if she can stay here for a few nights before she leaves


I have no room.

JaneFonda Thu 13-Dec-12 14:42:08

Oh, poor girl!

It must be so tough being so young, in a foreign country, and being exploited. Good for her for being assertive and refusing to just accept such a bad situation.

Could she stay on an airbed on the floor of your au pair's room? It would be a squeeze, but it would only be for a few nights and I imagine it would save her an awful lot of awkwardness etc. with her host family.

fedupwithdeployment Thu 13-Dec-12 14:46:48

They sound like an awful family. Poor girl. She is very young - any chance she could find something else?

An AP should not have sole charge of an under 3 for long periods iirc....all week!!!! That is something else.

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