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Going to need some help, what to get?

(7 Posts)
Stropzilla Thu 18-Oct-12 17:09:28

I've got another topic going www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat .

Basically I need an op that means I won't be able to lift for 2 months. DH can't take that much time off work, so we are looking at getting some help. Obviously the choices are au pair or nanny and live in or live out. I was hoping someone could explain the differences and what it sounds like we might need?

DH leaves the house at 8am, DD1 goes to school at 8.45, pick up at 3 and Dh home at about 6.15. DD is 7 months old, but I don't have my op date yet. No car, but near station and bus stops. We do have a spare room but house is a bit small, and it would be the box room. Cooking would probably extend to breakfast for DD1, and feeding DD2. It's a possibility that DH could temporarily reduce his hours so the day is not quite so long.

Is it even possible to get such short term help? I'm really worried about coping.

forevergreek Thu 18-Oct-12 17:34:14

I think your best bet is a temp nanny. Many available through agencies.

An au pair is basically the odd few hours after school with those approx aged children

A nanny will be experienced/ qualified, and suitable to leave your youngest in their care all day if needed. They will do breakfast/ getting oldest ready and out the house, school runs, homework, and all day care if during hoildays/ sickness days. Meanwhile they will entertain youngest/ cook for the children ( poss you/ dh if requested nicely). A nanny is police checked/ first aid trained at v min

nannynick Thu 18-Oct-12 17:45:53

Link to the thread in Chat, should it be handy.

Au-Pair:
Typically someone from abroad, EU country these days usually due to immigration rules (can come from a few other countries via Youth Mobility Scheme). Tend to be quite young, though age can vary teen-mid 20's, they are coming to the UK to experience life in the UK, learning English and in exchange for a room and food plus some money (typically under £107 a week), they help around the home doing a variety of household tasks and can include some care of children. Typically they would do around 25 hours a week, so are ideal for parents needing before/after school care. They may or may not have any childcare experience.

Nanny:
They are mostly coming to your home (they can either live-in, or live-out) to provide childcare. They will often also do some additional household tasks like the children's laundry. They will often have a good level of spoken English, though you can recruit from anywhere in the EU, or Youth Mobility Scheme countries, so language level may vary. Nannies may or may not have childcare experience (if it's their first job) but will usually have various levels of experience working with children of various ages. Nannies can be a good option for care of very young children, as you can recruit a nanny who has experience of caring for babies in the past.

DD2 being 7 months old and thus needing full-time care I see as being a problem for you. The spare room may be rather small and if you are recovering from an OP, I'm not sure you would want someone else around the house a lot of the time.

Why is a Childminder not an option? DH leaves at 8pm, so he could leave at 7.30am and drop both children to a childminder, who then takes DD1 to school and cares for DD2 all day. DH then does the pickup at 6/6.30pm ish. If his working hours are fairly well set then I don't see those hours being that hard to find a childminder to accommodate. Have you looked into local childminders - your local council can provide a list.

A live-out nanny may be an option. As a live-out nanny, I start work at 7am and finish at 7pm on my long days. However it's a more costly option than I would expect a childminder would be.

Would someone do it for a few months? That's the question for all childcare provider types... it will vary on the individual person.

I think the first decision you need to make is if you want someone else Living At Your Home.

How much advance notice will you get of the OP date?

fraktion Thu 18-Oct-12 17:53:59

Temp nanny.

I think you need someone who is confident and experienced enough to care for DD2, while juggling DD1's needs, seeing what needs doing and doing it without too much input from you. An au pair would be working very much under your direction, would have to live in and takes quite a considerable amount of mothering in some cases. You may strike lucky but you probably need someone rock solid and reliable who can hit the ground running and that isn't most au pairs.

Temp nannies can be live in or out, depending on where you are it might be easy to find a live out nanny.

Stropzilla Thu 18-Oct-12 19:00:10

Thanks for all your replies! Sorry about the bad link, thought I'd done it right!

Not too worried about live in or out, and we've tried to find local childminders before and failed miserably! Out of 3 possible ones near by, 1 was too full, 1 gave up and 1 never responded to our messages sad. The local council list was hopelessly outdated.

Would sitters.co.uk be a better choice perhaps?

fraktion Thu 18-Oct-12 19:01:45

Try childcare.co.uk as well as nannyjob.co.uk and your local netmums smile

Maybe someone on here would even be able to help? I think there are a few temps around.

Stropzilla Thu 18-Oct-12 19:14:35

Ok we would need a min of 25 hours a week if Dh can reduce his hours a bit and I can draft in some help from mum.

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