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Nanny bringing own child to house during school holidays?

(7 Posts)
QTPie Thu 04-Aug-11 15:06:33

Probably just musings, really...

What do other mums think about nannies bringing their child/ren along to work during the school holidays? Mine does and I have mixed feelings about it. Although, in reality, doubt that I can do anything about it: the alternative may be that she refuses to work during school holidays...

The first few times she asked, now she just seems to bring him along. Time before last she didn't say anything, last time she said "I brought him with me" as she dragged him through the door....

She only does two mornings (4 hours each) a week during term time, one morning a week (if I am lucky) during holidays. However she is very flexible. She is very experienced (20+ years) and not cheap.

My child seems to like her son (which is great), but I do worry about the split of attention and - when they are out and about - I worry that her mind isn't 100% on my child (ok probably not realistic anyway, but...).

Just musings really, since I doubt that I have much choice in the matter, but just wondered what other people in similar situations felt?

QT

colditz Thu 04-Aug-11 15:07:49

You do have a choice in the matter, you could find another nanny, but in your shoes I'd welcome the opportunity for your child to have some proper company whilst all the schools and toddler groups areshut.

alarkaspree Thu 04-Aug-11 15:12:21

I agree with colditz. If you're really unhappy with the situation then you can tell her not to bring him. But this arrangement would be fine with me. It's not necessary for children to have undivided attention from adults all the time, and if you think of it as a weekly playdate with a boy your child likes, it doesn't sound bad at all.

QTPie Thu 04-Aug-11 15:24:23

You are probably right, I just have a bit of uneasiness about it... The age difference is quite large (about 6 years).

Yes, I agree about not necessarily having "undivided attention".

Maybe typical "mother's guilt": am not there, so worry about the care that he is getting...

Novstar Thu 04-Aug-11 15:49:18

Well as a nanny employer, it seems odd to me that she'd start bringing her child to work without formal consent from the employer. Sounds like you employed her on the basis that she will not have her son with her, and I don't think it's fair for her to change this unilaterally. I wouldn't let this go by without having a conversation at least, and possibly contract/pay revision. What if her son's ill? Who's paying for her son when they go to activities? What about food for her son? What if her son injures himself while at your house, or breaks something in your house?

nannyl Fri 05-Aug-11 09:03:33

i think its only common courtesy to ask you.

Though for 4 hours once a week, may not be a problem, thats not the point!!!!

I dont see why him being there should be a problem, but to assume its ok and bring him along without asking is the issue IMO.

I wouldnt worry about the care / attention thing. Im sure your child comes first and hers is instructed to be good and go with the flow etc. Also can be good for all children to share (carers / toys / attention etc)

But regardless of that its up to you and she should most certainly ask you first and you do have a right to decline her request.

redglow Sat 06-Aug-11 18:15:05

Yes it had advantages bringing an own child along but not to ask is just rude . Tricky really as it not every week and not that many hours. She should ask ant not just presume.

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