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Nanny tea parties

(17 Posts)
SleeplessInSuburbiton Thu 26-May-11 23:29:35

Does anyone allow their nanny to have their nanny network (good friends and their charges) to meet at the family's homes while the family is at work? Any advice from btdt parents would be much appreciated.

nbee84 Thu 26-May-11 23:44:08

All jobs that I have been in have allowed me to have nanny friends around. I always informed my bosses who was coming and when. Sometimes an arrangement would be made at short notice (ie. bad weather) and I would just tell the Mum at the end of the day that x had viited that day.

SleeplessInSuburbiton Thu 26-May-11 23:58:16

Thanks nbee84, that's very helpful.

GoodDaysBadDays Fri 27-May-11 00:04:17

Yes, I do. I don't see it as any different to my dc's mixing with my 'mum friends' and their children.

My sister is a nanny and she regularly does this. Her nanny friends now are people she has met through her charges, toddler groups etc. so similar ages. She has been in her job 5 years so the children are good friends.

Blondeshavemorefun Fri 27-May-11 00:28:08

yes always have nanny friends around , just as i have mummy friends round and go to theirs

tbh if you decided to ban the nanny from socializing, you may not have a nanny

are you worried your house may get trashed?

Summersoon Fri 27-May-11 07:46:05

Yes, we always did, it was a big part of the socializing process, very important in my view.

nannynick Fri 27-May-11 08:25:20

We've had children (with a parent) come over for tea after school - does that count? I don't often meet other nannies - rural location, not sure if there are any other nannies in the village now... there used to be one other.

nannyl Fri 27-May-11 09:02:28

As a nanny i ALWAYS did

would have 1 or 2 visits per week normally. (normally just 1 nanny and their charges)

During the holidays it would not be unusual for me to have 3 or even 4 nannies around at once for lunch / tea + perhaps 8 - 10 children. We had big tables and lots of spare high / booster chairs etc, so could all sit down together and enjoy a meal all together or perhaps a picnic in the garden.

A typical scenario may be for 2 or 3 nannies to meet "at a place, or perhaps a local park / country park" a picnic lunch at the place, then back to a nannys house for naps (yes we had a fair few travel cots and dark rooms), older kids play in play room / garden and then dinner all together later.

Worked well for us all and very often, these days would be "free" (no expenses on entrance fees) just petrol, and parks etc are often free anyway.

SleeplessInSuburbiton Fri 27-May-11 09:19:33

Thanks everyone for the helpful information, this sounds very workable. Just getting a feel for what the standard practice is as we're new to it, no concerns except maybe about missing the party :-)

SuperDuperJezebel Fri 27-May-11 09:23:26

We do it a lot - great if the weather is miserable and theres not much money left in the kitty! I wouldn't do it if my employers didnt like it, but then again I think I would specifically choose not to work for parents who were against it - I think its important opportunity for the children to develop sharing and social skills, and I have definitely benefitted from having a good support network (having someone to bounce ideas off on how to deal with difficult behaviour, etc). I definitely wouldnt call it a tea party though - its definitely work, esp tidying up afterwards!

Strix Fri 27-May-11 10:05:59

Yes, I definitely encourage this. And no need to inform me ahead of time. Might ask her not to throw a raucous party on Friday, when DH works from home. I had a nanny who threw a Halloween party one year for the DCs and several of their friends from school. A good time was had by all and I have cute pictures of the day (but missed the party).

SometimesIAmABirdbrain Fri 27-May-11 13:36:48

We let our nanny do it all the time, in fact we encouraged it. If I was working from home, I used to shut myself in the study and wish I wasn't missing out on the fun! As long as our nanny told us beforehand, we were fine with it.

harrietthespook Fri 27-May-11 13:59:30

i encourage it too. i actually sell this as part of the au pair job we have, the fact that we set up regular dates at our place and other families' so the AP gets the opportunity to socialise with people her age and not feel lonely. we've never had anyone trash/not pick up after themselves.

This is on the understanding the the other nannies' children are friends of your DCs. Our first nanny did arrange get togethers with people who were of interest to HER primarily. I wouldn't outright ban this but it shouldn't be the nanny's empahsis.

harrietthespook Fri 27-May-11 14:46:36

What a twat comment from me, the lonely thing.

but seriously - the nannies do need company. have never understood why people don't like them having people round.

PickleMyster Fri 27-May-11 19:26:47

I had a very good nanny friend who looked after a child the same age as the one I looked after - children got on brilliantly. My friend's boss and mine were both VERY relaxed mum's and really encouraged it. On the odd occasion that I was ill, had hospital appointment and when I went on holiday my friend looked after both children and vice versa so there were never really any childcare issues for our bosses.

SleeplessInSuburbiton Sat 28-May-11 10:40:23

Thanks again everyone, appreciate all the comments.

candr Thu 02-Jun-11 12:52:58

I had nanny friends over but had to discuss with my boss the food aspect. She was happy to feed her children and their friends and me but not the other nanny which was a bit silly as the other boss had no problem with it. Was a big help having friends in same line of work who could help out with school runs when I had to take baby to emergency Dr etc. Did have some probs though where we would all go round to bosses friends house for tea so all kids could play only to discover they had given their nanny afternoon off and expected me to look after mine and theirs for no extra cash - it happened on everal occassions and was not appreciated by me, my boss felt like she had to pay me extra for the extra work which she was embarrassed about.

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