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Should I keep nanny on for a bit after DC2 is born?

(3 Posts)
CAS77 Wed 12-Jan-11 14:11:36

I currently have one DS who is 2 and half. He has a lovely (relatively new) nanny who we are all very happy with. I had half been thinking about starting DS in morning sessions at pre-school in September but thought I would probably try to keep the nanny on until he started reception aged 4.

However, I have recently found out that I am expecting baby number 2, which has slightly upset the applecart! (It was planned btw but for various health reasons, we were not expecting it to happen so soon). Baby is due at end of July. I suppose I would plan to start maternity leave around end of June / early July. I would plan to take a full year off and may possibly not return to my current role (would look for something more part time).

So, on the face of it, our nanny will be redundant as of July when I start mat leave...but part of me thinks it might be an idea to keep her on for a bit, say until the end of August. Firstly, because when I start mat leave I will be heavily pregnant and not sure I will be able to keep up with my son too well for those few weeks! Secondly, once the baby is here, it would be really helpful to have someone to take care of DS whil I focus on the baby (we have limited local support and no-one who could help out on a regular basis). I think this would be good for DS so he has some continuity through a time of big change. Plus, it would be a big help for me! Thirdly, it would mean that she would have a couple more months work.

The downside is the cost. I feel a bit indulgent paying for a nanny when strictly I don't really need it if you know what I mean. Also, I guess I am not sure how attractive it would be for her. At the moment she is sole charge and has the house to herself, freedom to do what she wants with him etc. She might feel that having me around all the time would cramp her style a bit! Also, it might be a bit weird for me having someone else around all the time. I really like her, but the relationship is a good, professional one rather than being really matey (which is kind of how I like it).

So, just wondering if anyone has any thoughts / suggestions on whether this kind of thing is a good idea or experience of doing the same sort of thing. Thanks.

PrettyCandles Wed 12-Jan-11 14:22:15

I would say to keep the nanny on for a few months at least. IMO money well-spent. Perhaps she might he interested in job-sharing with another family?

I have 3 dc, and have been a SAHM since no1 was born. When nos1 and 2 were born we lived minutes from my parents, in an area where I had lived for most of my life. When no3 was born we had moved to a new area, dc1 was struggling with the midyear change to a new school and I had only just got to know a few people.

Despite this, the post-natal period with dc3 was the happiest of the three. I put this down 100% to the help and support of my lovely doula. She was expensive but worth every penny, and in the end we kept her on twice as long as we had originally budgeted.

Having another adult in the house was marvellous for my sanity. My older dc loved her and she was such a huge help.

In your case there is the extra factor that keeping the nanny on will help your dc1 through this transition.

drinkyourmilk Wed 12-Jan-11 14:38:11

It depends on your nannies personality. Some nannies won't want any shared care at all while some are happy to. Would there also be the opportunity for her to help wit your newborn? This could make it more attractive - it would be nice to have some uninterrupted time with your son i think. Also are you clear on what her role would be? Would she be continuing the routine as before, or would you expect more of a mothers help role?

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