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Is there such a thing as a live-out au pair?

(17 Posts)
TitianTiger Wed 17-Nov-10 12:16:49

My 2.5 year old ds is currently very happy at nursery and attends full-time whilst I work nearby. However, in the new year I am starting a new job which will involve a lengthy commute and I won't be able to drop him off at nursery early enough on my way to work.
I will therefore need someone to take him to nursery and pick him up again and possibly the odd bit of babysitting when I have to stay later at work.
Does this sound like something a live-out au pair could/should be doing (don't want to break any rules?!). It seems such a big sacrifice to have someone living in our home with us when it's just 1 hour in the morning and 1 hour in the evening - or is it?

Does anyone have any advice or thoughts? I have thought about a full time nanny, but I think my son actually really benefits from the socialisation and activities at nursery.

Thanks TT

juneybean Wed 17-Nov-10 12:41:52

I don't think so, I don't know how an au pair could live out on such a low wage unless it was a local teen?

kitkat1967 Wed 17-Nov-10 12:57:47

I'm in the process of getting an au pair for the same reason - 45 mins before school and after - have been unable to find any alternative solution.

frakkinup Wed 17-Nov-10 13:02:55

There's no such thing as a live out au pair - it would be a live out nanny/mother's help.

1 hour in the morning, 1 hour in the evening you'd be overpaying if you had an au pair. They're about £70 a week in wages, plus the cost of living etc.

What about trying to negotiate with one of the nursery staff? It would be valuable nannying experience for them and the nursery shouldn't mind because it's not like you're actively poaching their staff.

Local sixth former or student? Assuming your nursery is 8-6 so you need someone 7-8 and then 6-7....

mickytoo Wed 17-Nov-10 13:03:00

"au pair" is a difficult word because it implies a certain set up but it's not well defined. Simpler to call it a nanny. You might be able to find a live out nanny who can do that, but I think you'd have to be very lucky indeed because it doesn't pay much and the timings don't leave much scope for finding another job to supplement their income. Maybe you can find someone who works at the nursery who could do this?

TitianTiger Wed 17-Nov-10 13:35:40

Thank you all for your comments. I use one of ds' favourite nursery nurses for the odd babysitting, and she is doing her level 3 NVQ and the local college so I have just sent her an email to see whether she fancies earning an additional £16 per day as I think we are on her way to work anyway
Failing that, I think I'll look at a full time live-out nanny but with a few sessions at nursery still to keep up the social interaction...

This is when I had family nearby

frakkinup Wed 17-Nov-10 13:50:48

Childminder? That offers a mix of activities and social interaction with flexibility and isn't as expensive as a FT live out nanny.

Or a nanny with own child of a similar age? Or a share?

TitianTiger Wed 17-Nov-10 14:39:46

meant to say "this is when I wish I had family nearby"...

Frakkinup - we started off with a childminder when ds was 9 months but in the space of 6 months she couldn't have him on 9 occasions because either she or her daughter was ill and it came to be a bit of a mare...

frakkinup Wed 17-Nov-10 16:26:14

Fair point - with a nursery you have pretty much guaranteed cover...

Fingers crossed the nursery nurse who lives near you can help.

Sequins Wed 17-Nov-10 21:31:28

We have an au pair for just this situation. She is very nice and we are happy to live with her. The problem is DH and I do not have 9-5 hours, H works c.10.30 to 6.30 and I work 8 to 6 with unreliable commute (short train journey but often delayed by leaves on line etc.) It is a nice job for an au pair as it is light hours and it has been good for us for flexibility e.g. when DS has been ill she has cared for him for the day (for extra pay).

sunnydelight Thu 18-Nov-10 04:18:54

If the nursery nurse taking him means he arrives before the nursery is officially open, just make sure the owner/manager is ok with this arrangement. It might seem like a funny thing to pick up on, but a friend with a similar arrangement had to stop as the nursery kids were only insured from a certain time so the child couldn't be on site, but the staff member had to start work before the kids arrived.

Niknaks1046 Thu 18-Nov-10 05:57:28

Hi, just thought i'd let you know that there is some people that do this. I've just completed my childminding course and they was a lady on the course that is becoming a live-out nanny.

It might be worth contacting a nanny agency to find out. Otherwise speak to the family services information as they will have a list of minders in your area with vacancies. It might just be that you were unlucky with the one you had.

vicki2010 Fri 19-Nov-10 08:28:10

im a childminder and not had a day off in the three years i have been doing it!! we are out at playgroups or softplay/park library etc EVERY day so they get loads of interaction (depending on the childminder)..i think it would be worth you looking for another one you prob were unlucky first time....good luck!

togarama Fri 19-Nov-10 11:57:51

We started off with a live-in au pair who has now become a live-out au pair / mothers help.

Our AP moved out into a student flat down the road after the first year as she has started college here. Her home government covers her living and study costs.

She still looks after DD 2.5 days per week (around 25 hours) but we pay her slightly more than previously and I think she probably falls more into the mothers-help category.

cjn27b Sun 21-Nov-10 18:57:28

There is such a thing as an au-pair share, where the au-pair lives with one family and the other pays but they work for both of you. Might be an option if you know of someone else who is willing to have an au-pair live in and wants some childcare.

MammyT Wed 24-Nov-10 21:28:54

We got an au pair for the reasons you mention and asked her to do housework, a night babysitting and the option of a couple of hours at the weekend.

It worked out well and we didn't find it intrusive with nice girls.

Treeesa Thu 25-Nov-10 12:04:22

cjn27b - Are you implying the 'other' family pay all of a 'regular salary', while the 'host' family don't pay any pocket money but offer the accommodation/meals..?

The au pair is only living as a member of the family with one of the families so only that first family can really pay 'pocket money'..

There are many au pairs who work for other families doing bits and pieces of extra cleaning/baby-sitting etc. In these cases they will be paid a regular salary though..

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