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CM pals, need a huge hug tonite.....anyone???

(111 Posts)
underpaidandoverworked Sat 30-Oct-10 23:46:42

(Deep breath)

OH admitted to hospital Thursday - because I made him go!!!- with pneumonia, taken a turn for worse, not sure if he will pull through.....

Can't cope......

Managed to cancel 1 mindee for Monday, can't get hold of other parents and really not able to do face-to-face at the moment without turning into a puffa fish sad. Feel really bad about cancelling but can't possibly look after LO when cant look after myself. Would it be wrong to send a family member round to tell them? Have arranged cover with another cm child knows and has been minded by before.

Christ I feel shite!

On top of all this DS is 6 this wk and might not get to see daddy......

Sorry all, but at least you cant here me crying sadsad, phonecalls tonight to friends have ended in floods.

bloodsuckingLOONEY Sat 30-Oct-10 23:53:59

OMG hun, I don't know what to say but just had to give you a big {{{{hug}}}}. I'm so sorry you're going through this right now, I wouldn't worry about work and yes, of course I think it's ok to send another person round on your behalf. Anyone should be understanding and if not, aren't worth bothering about.

What have they said at the hospital?

(if I disappear, sorry, we're laying a new floor and may have to disconnect cables so may loose net)


MaudOHara Sat 30-Oct-10 23:55:45

Not a CM but (((((hug)))))

Hope your OH responds to treatment - take care of yourself

NothereisnobodylurkingbehindU Sat 30-Oct-10 23:56:10

Not a childminder but you poor thing! If you have arranged cover then either send that person round with a letter or send a relative around wth a letter. Just say 'Dear x, due to the sudden and very serious illness of my partner I cannot provide care for x today. I have arranged for y to do so, as you know she is known to x. I am sory for any inconvience but as I'm sure you will understand my family circumstances are very diffcult at the moment. I will keep you closely informed of the situation. Yours etc'
Then forget about it and concentrate on your oh and ds! Hope he improves soon. Amazing things can happen - don't lose hope. I know two people who were in a very bad way with lung things - one swine flu and the other pleurisy following severe asthma and they pulled through.

HSMM Sun 31-Oct-10 00:01:01

I'm sure it's fine to let someone else contact them on your behalf. Take care.

underpaidandoverworked Sun 31-Oct-10 00:05:50

Hospital not really saying much, he been on IV antibiotics for 48 hrs, morphine, any other medication they will throw at him but he not responding.

This all came on in the space of 48 hrs, mega sudden deterioration - he couldnt breath and had chest pain, had to take mindee to hosp with us because couldnt contact parents.

This mindees parents have been fab, another have taken my DS today and kept him occupied - wow!!!! I thought I was going to have a nice, easy quiet half-term week......

bloodsuckingLOONEY Sun 31-Oct-10 00:08:22

I can't believe it, must have come as a shock! Nice of your mindee's parents to look after your ds. Does he know much about what's going on? I really feel for you and wish I could make things better. Take care and we're here if you need us. xxxx

underpaidandoverworked Sun 31-Oct-10 00:15:01

He knew daddy was poorly last wk but have just told him took daddy to hospital and the doctors are fixing him (hopefully) but it's going to take a while. He now thinks doctors are crap cos he been away a few days hmm

When I cry he thinks I have something in my eye- have no eyelashes left as far as he's concerned now.

He did have a convo at mindee pals house where he said 'my mammy was crying today'. Mindee said 'my mammy does that sometimes - it's a girl thing'......

off to try and sleep now - thanx all xxxx

badgerhead Sun 31-Oct-10 07:10:01

Just come onto this, I hope your OH responds to the treatment & big hugs to you & your ds. You certainly have done the right thing regardds to mindies & yes I would send round someone else with a message as well. My family had to let my mindies know when I was hospitalised unexpectedly 3 years ago & that was no problem.

KatyMac Sun 31-Oct-10 07:24:45

Oh pet - I know exactly what you are going through.

Remember when he comes out he will need a fair amount of looking after

Which antibiotic is he on? & at what dosage?

Send someone round with a note - it's better if it's in writing

BoysAreLikeDogs Sun 31-Oct-10 08:20:09

oh no

yes, send someone round with a note

I hope he gets better very soon


CarGirl Sun 31-Oct-10 08:24:59

Wishing all the best for OH dh had pneumonia earlier this year it was very scary and he fortunately got off very very lightly.

Huge hugs your way, if the parents don't understand then they are probably not a family you would wish to continue with. I would put "critically" ill the note so they truly do know how serious this is.


bloodsuckingLOONEY Sun 31-Oct-10 08:28:36

Been thinking of you hun, hope you managed to get some sleep last night!! I'm keeping everything crossed for you that he responds to treatment soon. Keep us posted xxx

LesbianMummy1 Sun 31-Oct-10 08:57:53

sending hugs and best wishes. Send a note to the mindee he/she is not your top priority and you have been kind enough to find alternative care.

Just to give you a glimmer of hope when ds was born and in intensive care with a lung infection my grandad got rushed in with triple pneumonia and spent 72 hours touch and go then turned the corner and went home alone. He was 78 so it can change as quick as it started.

mum2akebk Sun 31-Oct-10 09:21:18

Hope you have some better news today and your oh starts to improve.

As for childminding, you have done all you can and have been kind enough to find alternative care when your world has been turned upside down. I am sure the parents will understand and be sympathetic if someone else delivers the note on your behalf. Once that has been done I wouldn't worry about it anymore.

Take care.

crace Sun 31-Oct-10 09:27:45

Thinking of you, try to take care of yourself- CM under these circumstances would be impossible.

I really really hope your DH starts to pull through, this must be a terrifying ordeal for you. I can't imagine.

Thinking of you all, take care of yourself!!

SHRIIIEEEKPoolingBearBlood Sun 31-Oct-10 09:32:23

you poor thing, guessing you're at hospital today but let us know how he is when you can.

Jusyt in case you had overlooked it, Northern has given you the wording

Dear x, due to the sudden and very serious iillness of my partner I cannot provide care for x this week. I have arranged for y to do so, as you know she is known to x. I am sorry for any inconvience but as I'm sure you will understand my family circumstances are very diffcult at the moment. I will keep you closely informed of the situation. Yours etc'

(I have changed it to "this week")

At the moment, you probably don't even have time to come up with wordings fir the note

underpaidandoverworked Sun 31-Oct-10 09:48:58

Hi everyone, thanks for all the hugs and support.

He still not responding to treatment and has had a bad night. Am on total autopilot today, need sleep but cant sleep - and DS now asking questions. Have imagined every scenario that could come of this and my head is tooootally battered. Have upset his family because have said I just want to go to see him by myself today - there were 8 round the bed yesterday hmm.

Will be back later xxxx

SHRIIIEEEKPoolingBearBlood Sun 31-Oct-10 10:01:24

oh shit
What can we do to help?

BoysAreLikeDogs Sun 31-Oct-10 10:03:04

8 round the bed is unreasonable

talk to hosp staff - ask them to police in future to take the pressure off, staff will understand

tell DS that yes Daddy is ill but you can't answer and questions as you don't know what the Drs will say, and that as he is so ill you can't say when he will be allowed home

x x x

(nb sounds like myo/peri carditis in my limited experience)

CarGirl Sun 31-Oct-10 10:03:57


bloodsuckingLOONEY Sun 31-Oct-10 10:07:44

More {{{hugs}}} xx

sharbie Sun 31-Oct-10 10:26:29

sending best wishes and hope things go better today xx

CarGirl Sun 31-Oct-10 17:49:31

Been thinking of you all day x

crace Sun 31-Oct-10 19:11:58

Hope your Dh is doing better, thinking of you x

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