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How can I get help with drop-offs etc

(6 Posts)
PistachioQueen Fri 17-May-19 23:07:49

I am in the process of divorcing a man with narcissistic personality disorder, we have a young child together who sees her dad once a week. Drop offs and collection have been increasingly fraught, with him making threatening and disturbing comments which leave me in bits for days. I have tried to find someone to drop my child off to him and collect after, perhaps even meeting me round the corner to make things easier, but childminders are either fully booked or can’t do this as they’re getting their own kids ready for bed. I desperately need someone to help, but don’t want to start advertising for just anyone as I’m afraid that could lead to dire consequences for my child. What are my options for this and where could I find them, as I’d rather have someone who is DBS checked etc?

sleepismysuperpower1 Sat 18-May-19 13:01:26

where are you based OP? have a search on childcare.com x

lilmoopoo Mon 20-May-19 19:49:37

To be totally honest, most childminders wouldn't do just a drop off and collection. You would probably be required to pay their minimum session rate. I, for example, have a 3 hour minimum session some childminder may charge for an hour. I think it would also put a childminder in a very uncomfortable position with your ex, if he gives you grief what makes you think he won't give someone else grief.

There may be someone out there who would do it but I think you will struggle to find anyone. Is there a friend or a family member who could possibly help at all?

LoisLittsLover Mon 20-May-19 19:54:17

Some contact centres will just facilitate handovers for little or no charge. If you Google child contact centres in your area, a list should come up. National association of contact centres may also point you in the right direction.

Mintypea5 Mon 20-May-19 20:04:36

When does your ex have your child? If it's a week day / night could you enrol them in nursery / childminder for the day and then they'd be to pick them up from the setting rather than you.

If not some children's centres can help facilitate this kind of situation or could help you get in touch with a contact centre etc

PistachioQueen Fri 24-May-19 00:04:14

Thanks for your advice everyone. I’d assumed contact centres were for abusive parents but perhaps this is my best option.

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