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Going through my birth plan with the midwife today - what should I put in it?

(25 Posts)
Miaou Thu 07-Jul-05 07:37:34

I've got a few ideas, and I know things vary from place to place, but have you got any tips about what should go in it?

I've had a look in the archives but couldn't find anything...

Fran1 Thu 07-Jul-05 07:42:12

I wrote a very basic one and didn't even show it to the mw as i arrived at hospital quite late and we all just got on with delivering a baby! But it all turned out the way i wanted anyway.

I had said i wanted to avoid pain relief - except gas and air.
I said if anything happened to baby and me - dp was to stay baby rather than me and be consulted on every matter.
I said i wanted to breastfeed.
And i wanted baby to be given to me immediately.

Think that was all!

sobernow Thu 07-Jul-05 08:14:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bumptobabies Thu 07-Jul-05 08:25:52

as said before i think the main thing is not to end up disapointed if you dont stick to it.
the easyist way to avoid this is to have sugestions like speak to me or partner before a procedure and i wish to be active, i wish to have baby to feed imediatly, etc.
i wouldnt put anything around pain relif as your hormones may get you through it nicely you and partner can always decide that later.
most woman request pain relief at the time of transition when your so close to meeting your baby i wish you well

Miaou Thu 07-Jul-05 08:42:42

Thanks for the advice so far.

Other things I am thinking that it's worth finding out, eg do they provide gowns/towels etc, that sort of thing - anything else practical I should be asking?

Littlefish Thu 07-Jul-05 09:28:07

I took my own towel with me so I could have a lovely big soft one! I also took my own pillow so I could be comfortable in the ward. I took a bottle of ribena and some flapjacks (in case the food was awful!). I had to send my MIL out for some muslins because I forgot to bring them. Take some really scraggy old pants, or disposable pants for afterwards - it's not worth ruining good knickers! Find out what the situation is with telephones - do you need cash, phone card or special hospital card? I wanted to phone absolutely everybody!

The main thing IMO with your birthplan is to make sure that your partner knows what you want so that if you are stressed or tired, they can back you up.

Like Fran1, I put in my wishes about breastfeeding - e.g. wanted support to do it, and if not able to breastfeed immediately, I wanted the baby to be fed by cup or spoon until I was able to breastfeed.

I also put in that I was happy to have 1 student doctor or midwife present, but only as an observer.

Like Bumptobabies and Sobernow said, don't be so set on particular things that you might become disappointed if they don't happen. My birthplan was my "best case scenario", but I kept stressing that I was open to discussion and wanted to be kept fully informed.

BTW my midwife read my birthplan really carefully and asked me a few questions just to clarify. She was wonderful!

Mosschops30 Thu 07-Jul-05 09:39:40

Message withdrawn

mrsdarcy Thu 07-Jul-05 09:46:06

I have asked them to talk me through the delivery. When I had DS1 he didn't make any noise as his head was delivered and I was too scared to ask if he was alive or not! Apparently he was looking around the room whilst I was waiting for the next contraction to deliver his body, and was just fine - but I didn't know any of that. This time I would like them to tell me exactly what the baby is doing.

I've also asked if the hospital chaplain can bless the baby as soon as practicable after delivery, but I know that isn't everyone's cup of tea.

I've asked if they can use an anaesthetic spray before inserting the venflon for antibiotics (I have GBS) as I am hopeless with needles.

I'd assume you have to provide everything yourself - pads, knickers, towels, nappies etc. Someone on the June thread posted a really detailed list of what she was putting in her hospital bag - it might be worth a look.

Good luck

Dalesgirl Thu 07-Jul-05 09:51:34

My second baby is due next week my midwife is not interested in a birthplan - nobody cares second time around, I suspect I will be left to get on with it!!!

However, I have filled it in just in case I go crazy during the delivery and they have to refer to it....

1.No pethidine, don't fancy drugs that make you sick and then being administered drugs that counteract the sickness.
2.Baby delivered directly to me.
3.Husband to give directions should I lose control and not be able to commuicate in anything but cries...this actually happened last time!! What fun.
4.Gas and air as appropriate when requested.

In hospital,
1. take plenty of face and body lotions and potions, the atmospheres are so dry. Face cleansing wipes..I like the Boots Botanicals ones.
2.Water, Water, Water!!
3.Remember to ask for a bath or a shower...I know that seems ridiculous but in my case I expected the nurses to tell me when I could have one (when my epidural had worn off), they didn't and I was too overwhelmed to ask - five days later(baby kept in with jaundice) my stitches had infected and I spent a week on antibiotics! The nurses response was " Oh, you should have had a wash on day one, did no-one tell you?" No, actually they forgot to leave that little detail out!! It's the simplest things that can go pear-shaped!!
4. If you don't feel confident with the breasfeeding ask, ask, ask and get a breast-feeding counsellor (that's what they call them in Yorkshire) to help you. Pester the staff until you are satisfied. There will be less people to ask when you get home and you might feel exesperated and give up.

After all that, enjoy your birth day and your new baby - given all my rantings I know I will!!!!!

Miaou Thu 07-Jul-05 15:46:14

Thank you everyone for the input. Midwife i saw today was so keen to rush on to the next person that she pretty well skipped over the birth plan, with a "oh, you've done it twice before, you'll be able to teach us" . Maybe, but both times previously were in a different hospital and I had an epidural, which isn't an option this time! I managed to slip in a question about how long I can stay in, but didn't get chance to ask about towels etc before we were hustled out! Never mind, m/w I am seeing next week is more approachable and clued up so I will ask then.

Catsmother Thu 07-Jul-05 20:20:54

Miaou, I'm not sure from what you've written whether or not you did actually get to fill in a birth plan with the midwife, but as you say the one you're seeing next week is more approachable, if I were you I'd type out my birth wishes (in as big and bold font as space allows) and insist this is stapled onto my notes if they don't have time to transcribe it !

Everyone's got different hopes, fears, needs and wants, but in mine I put (in no particular order):

- I wanted to avoid artificial pain relief if at all possible & use my TENS machine, but was open to reviewing situation if need arose ( ... and boy it did, but that's another story)
- I wanted as much intimacy/privacy to the occasion as possible, i.e. just me (obviously), DP and midwife. No students or cleaners !
- I wanted to avoid tearing and would appreciate any guidance/assistance midwife could offer to help me do this at crucial moment (my midwife was fantastic & I had no stiches with 9lb6oz baby)
- I didn't want any procedures being done to me without my express permission beforehand
- I did NOT want anyone announcing sex of baby and wanted it handed to me asap for me to find out (even if baby had to be taken away for medical attention)

I'm pleased to say my midwife followed this to the letter. I was eventually wheeled in for emergency CS only for baby to make an appearance at the last moment in the operating theatre. Midwife shooed all the theatre staff out at that point as thankfully they had become superfluous, and I was very grateful she remembered my plea for privacy.

I just wish it were possible to write a post-natal plan, as I have to say that the unfriendly indifference I found after was in very stark contrast to my labour care.

Gem13 Thu 07-Jul-05 20:28:02

Apart from all the stuff about pain relief I also wrote down DH's name in big letters (we have different surnames) and put things down that I knew would bother me. Things like I wanted DH to tell me the sex of our baby, he was to stay with the baby at all times if we were separated, the baby shouldn't be given formula as I wanted to breastfeed. Things that may or may not be asked but which would upset me if they did or didn't happen.

kgc Sat 09-Jul-05 21:26:01

hi miaou when I was having my fourth I made sure I was heard in my birthplan and made it very clear and confident so they knew it was my body, my birth and my baby.

spidermama Sat 09-Jul-05 21:30:52

1. Don't offer pain relief. Only give if I request it.

2. Let dp cut the cord.

3. No routine syntometrin for 3rd stage.

4. I want to be able to move around.

marne Sat 09-Jul-05 21:31:05

I wrote down that i didnt want any drugs, BIG mistake.

kgc Sat 09-Jul-05 21:37:12

- Marne!!

sweetkitty Sat 09-Jul-05 21:44:40

I didn't get round to writing my birth plan first time around DD arrived early, didn't even open my carefully packed hospital bag either, went in took off jeans and pants gave birth.

This time:

- only gas and air (even if I'm screaming pretend midwives have given me morphine!!)
- baby delivered onto me, also want to feel head coming out this time
- natural 3rd stage cut placenta when it's stopped pulsing
- oh I want a homebirth as well lasting approx 10 mins lol

marne Sat 09-Jul-05 21:48:21

Wont be doing that again, next time it will be drugs and lots of them!

spidermama Sat 09-Jul-05 21:49:19

Oooh! Marne. Bring back memories does it?

kgc Sat 09-Jul-05 21:52:19

LOL Marne!!

marne Sat 09-Jul-05 21:53:41

11 hours of hell, never thought it would be that painful, i was so wrong.

kgc Sat 09-Jul-05 21:56:09

Is that your first, if so anymore after that one Marne!!!!

mumfor1sttime Sat 09-Jul-05 22:25:01

I didnt do a birth plan- cant see how you can plan a birth!

marne Sat 09-Jul-05 22:28:08

trying for no2 at the moment, will be having drugs for sure. hasnt put me off.

kgc Sat 09-Jul-05 22:38:14

Good for you Marne and good luck with no.2....use all the drugs you can....

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