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Childbirth

Did you find your third birth easier?

16 replies

devotion · 07/11/2009 23:25

Please say yes ?

I've had two natural births but they did not really feel natural iykwim

Both times about 12 hours, dd2's birth was calm for most of it but they both ended with me feeling traumatised.

This time I am planning a homebirth and I have been practicing hypopbirthing and I am really looking forward to it. Any fear I had attached to birth is now gone.

I am just hoping that baby #3 will not take 12 hours too. I am really interested to hear how long everyones third was and did you feel you were able to cope better?

Its the second stage that I worry about because both times I had midwives frantically shouting that I had to get that baby out now!!!

Both times they had to be yanked out, I am really hoping this baby will be able to make their own entrance into the world without coaching and shouting from all around him or her and me squeezing the breath out of their poor little body.

Thanks x

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displayuntilbestbefore · 07/11/2009 23:27

No idea how yours will turn out as I didn't have same problems with previous births, but my 3rd was a lot faster.
So, my answer is YES.

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Ineedabreak · 07/11/2009 23:30

My third birth was a homebirth and was fab - and quick. 1st was 24hrs, 2nd 4hrs and 3rd 1 hr.

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Northernlurker · 07/11/2009 23:38

Yes it was definately the best. The labour actually took a bit longer than dd2 - about an hour or so more because my waters didn't break and that was all that was holding her in. I felt very in control of my position, love the hospital midwife who was fantastic and coped fine with the pain. I did lose a fair bit of blood in the immediate aftermath which meant they wanted me to stay in overnight - I thought this was daft as it was only 5am at this point so I stayed in for the day and went home at 3pm. I was very tired by then - with the blood loss and lack of sleep but the whole thing was great actually.

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bamboo · 07/11/2009 23:48

Absolutely!

dd was a long back to back labour ending in a c section. ds1 was a fairly traumatic, though not lengthy, ventouse delivery.

I'd planned a homebirth for ds2 as I couldn't face going into hospital again. This time my whole attitude was different - I felt really positive, got a Tens machine and geared myself up to cope with little or no pain relief. Of course there was still the odd niggling doubt as, like you say, I felt the previous 2 were "yanked out"!

Anyway, my homebirth didn't happen but the labour was quick and relatively easy.

You sound really chilled about it which I think will help. Also labouring at home, in your own environment, might be better - fewer hospital-imposed time limits and stuff. Good luck!

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Housemum · 08/11/2009 00:14

3rd was great for me too - first was crash section, second was drawn out over a weekend of on-off contractions, then a drip to speed things along. 3rd was waters broke at 7.30 am, contracting all day (v mild at first) then born 9.30 pm. The big thing for me this time was walking around - with DD2 the midwife told me to get some rest/have a bath which I did, and everything ground to a halt. This time I paced up and down the corridor, stood up to watch the telly on the ward, basically didn't sit down unless I was on the loo! (They should pin pages of a book to the wall, read the MRSA poster about a thousand times!)

Didn't have a home birth because of previous section and I personally didn't feel the need to push for it (no pun intended) but to me it was as good as, as I told the MW I wanted to leave straight away and she was OK with that as long as I came back for the doctor's check in the morning. Was home by midnight, so other DD could see her new sister as soon as she woke up in the morning - as good as a home birth to me.

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flybynight · 08/11/2009 11:46

Yes, absolutely.

I was induced, but my labours are fast and furious anyway. No pain relief, 20 mins from 1cm dilated to delivery, used a birthing stool which I would recommend to anyone. Baby was relaxed and ready to be born. I felt confident and in control.

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devotion · 08/11/2009 11:53

thank you ladies!

just what i want to hear.

i have not had bad experiences of hospitals, in fact I was treated so well both times.

its just that you have no control over what is happening around you noisewise etc.

With dd2 I was had been practicing my hynobirthing and I felt really in control at home, when i got to the hospital there was no room for me so i had to wait at the reception and i was trying to focus and take myself somewhere else in my head but everytime i opened my eyes i could see both of the receptionists staring at me feeling all sorry for me and every minutes saying, "ahh bless her... ahh look at her.... not long now darling... looks so painful...oooh" not what you want to hear.

I know they were being sweet but I wanted to shout, "stop looking at me and SHUT UP!". So I struggled to focus. Finally got a room and I managed to go deep into relaxtion and ride the contractions. It actually felt ok and I was managing really well until..... a midwide insisted on checking me and said in a feeling sorry for me voice, "You are now fully dilated but I am afraid you cant push because the baby is too high and your waters are intact.... blah blah" all negative stuff.

If she had not told me this I would have continued as I was and unaware. The baby was not in distress nor was I but after she said that I felt like I was failing and immediately got upset and out of nowhere the pain came crashing in and from then until three hours later I was in agony and totally lost it. I could not get back to where I was.

I had in my birth notes to not talk to me but to my partner on my behalf and he would tell me only what i needed to know. But it was too late and my dh struggled to get me to focus again.

Of course the midwife meant no harm but they dont realise how important their words are to a labouring woman. You are so sensitive in labour and you should only be told negative things if the baby is in danger and you need to know or if you ask of course.

So I just feel this time if I have a home birth I can control what goes on if it all runs smoothly. I will speak to my midwifes beforehand etc.

I sound so bossy!

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Morloth · 08/11/2009 13:52

I don't know about 3rd as am only on my second.

But hypnobirthing rocks, worked a treat for me, no pain, quite a long time from first contraction to pushing but after around 4 good pushes he slid right out.

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neolara · 08/11/2009 19:43

My third was more painful than my second, but it only took 30 mins, so I can't really complain. I had her at home - actually my dh delivered her because she appeared so fast. Midwife and ambulance crew arrived minutes later.

I would imagine your 3rd will be quicker than your other two. Good luck and I hope you get the birth you want.

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beautifulgirls · 08/11/2009 20:57

DD#1 14hrs ventouse
DD#2 13hrs straightforwards but hated every moment of it
DD#3 3.5hrs definately loads easier than either of the others and a wonderful hypnotherapy/waterbirth.

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devotion · 09/11/2009 19:03

beautifulgirls - i love it

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Tomatefarcie · 09/11/2009 20:21

31 weeks pg with DC3, am loving this thread!

(all I seem to hear at the mo, incl from my own midwife, is how unpredictable third labours can be, how one ended up with a csection, the other with a 5 day labour etc etc)

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YouKnowNothingoftheCrunch · 09/11/2009 20:23

Yes, loads easier!

Woke up at 4.30am, called MW at 7 (home birth) but unsure whether she needed to come yet or not, dd born at 8! No intervention, no drugs. Recovery time was a quarter that of ds2. And she was 8lbs 10 in case you thought she was tiny. Other labours were at least twice that time.

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thisisyesterday · 09/11/2009 20:25

ds1- hospital, 18 hrs, ventouse

ds2- home, 6 hrs no probs, very manageable and nice

ds3- home, 45 mins. VERY painful and intense. really couldn't cope with the pain, but over quickly

overall my second was my favourite and my best, longer, but far more manageable

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fingbusymum · 09/11/2009 22:01

ds1 - hospital in France, emergency C-section

dd - St Mary's, Paddington, 6 hrs, easy and relaxed

ds2 - St Mary's Paddington, 2 hrs, brilliant

Basically, south of France not nice for having babies. 3rd birth by far the fastest but 2nd the best because midwives so lovely. Everyone warned me 3rd births scary and unpredictable, but mine so fast and straightforward.

When are you due? Would you consider being observed with baby one hour a week as part of my Infant Observation course at the Tavistock?

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devotion · 09/11/2009 22:43

Whats the Infant Observation course all about then?

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