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If you have the opportunity to talk through your birth with a midwife -

(8 Posts)
boundarybabe Mon 05-Oct-09 16:09:25

do it!

I met with a midwife a week ago to discuss my birth experience - to cut a long story short I was sent home whilst in labour (not 'established' hmm), and then ended up with possible foetal distress and an em cs. In all honesty, I was terrified of going through it all again next time and it's only recently I've started to think I'd like another one one day (DS is 7 months). The midwife ordered my notes and we had an hour and a half one-to-one meeting, and I can honestly say I feel 100% better about the whole thing. I just wanted to tell you Mnetters what a positive experience it was. smile

PlantASeedWatchItGrow Mon 05-Oct-09 18:09:30

Thanks Boundary

Last week I booked a doctors app. for this coming Wednesday to ask for a referal back to the hospital to talk over my notes again. I had a pretty terrible birth and want to try for another!

I hope that I feel as good after mine appointment. smile

Meglet Mon 05-Oct-09 18:19:34

I did it and thoroughly recommend it too.

GoldenSnitch Mon 05-Oct-09 18:23:21

I felt worse after mine! Before the meeting I didn't know DS had been back to back - the consultant only worked this out when they opened me up and saw a face rather than the back of DS head, I didn't know how much blood I had lost, didn't know how long DS had been in distress before they gave me the EMCS, didn't know what or how bad his APGAR scores had been and more!!

And the pathetic excuses for why the midwives had ignored me and refused to help me with my TENS machine, or to help me run and get into a bath or offer me any pain relief were infuriating!

OK so I'm glad I know now but if anything has persuaded me to push for an elective section this time - it's my Birth Experiences meeting!!

PlantASeedWatchItGrow Mon 05-Oct-09 18:29:41

Clearly that was supposed to say my, was in a rush sorry!

I really hope I get some 'answers' and 'closure' (I hate that word) from my appointment.

PlantASeedWatchItGrow Mon 05-Oct-09 18:35:19

Sorry to hear that Golden I think it really depends on cicumstances wether it will 'heel' or not.

There is are no more bad things I could learn from my birth, it was terrible and after suffering PTS and constant panic attacks all day everyday, I feel that I can only get heeling from mine.

I 'know' all the things that they did wrong/went wrong, and if I did learn anything new, it wouldn't suprise me in the least. It was literally bad from start to finish, they did everything wrong and I suffered as a result. I think that asking questions and being able to express my feeling of complete let down will only help me.

But I can completely see how, if you didn't know things were as bad as they were that it could actually cause you more distress, as in your case.

PlantASeedWatchItGrow Mon 05-Oct-09 18:36:57

Sorry, my spelling/grammar is terrible tonight blush

GoldenSnitch Mon 05-Oct-09 20:41:24

I knew it was bad but it just got worse when we talked it through and there were no decent excuses for why the midwives had been as rubbish as they were.

I suppose I did find out that it is no longer hospital policy to separate newborns from thier mothers for 2 hours straight after birth and that DD will be allowed in recovery with me so that was reassuring.

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