This is baby (hopefully) number 4 (even at 30 weeks I'm scared to hope having had 4 mcs so no laughing at me). DD1 was induced, I had 11 midwives, the last one being my domino midwife that I'd hoped would follow through the whole thing. I learnt first hand that if baby is not ready to come out and you induce that if feels like you're trying to "crow bar" baby out. DD2 was 2 weeks early, an abrupted placenta and I lost 2 litres of blood had to have a transfusion but was nevertheless (from my perspective and NOT from a medical perspective) an awful lot easier than the first as it was over in a couple of hours . DS1 was induced (against my better judgement but I kind of got emotionally cornered by the consultant) and not only did he NOT want to come out but he was back to back. I had epidural which failed on one side leaving me on my back in total agony pushing when I wasn't ready for sheer hell for 8 hours. Since baby number 4 wasn't planned I never bothered talking to anyone about ds's birth but thinking back to his labour leaves me absolutely shaking/sick with fear. I'm even considering an elective ceaserean (sp?) which is a shame given I pushed the other 3 out.
My perfect labour (aside of course from having little pain and wafting around would be to have little one at home with a known midwife that I trust implicitly. Given the drama of number 2 and sheer mess that number 3 turned into can anyone suggest ideas on how I could make this less fearful. I'm certain that going into hospital scares me. Not so much the medical aspect that's good more that I feel 100% out of control. With each new midwife I'm trying to ensure they like me and don't disapprove of any decision I need to make. Oddly labour number 2 I had a midwife that I really bonded with and I'm sure that's why of all the three labours I remember that one with almost joy. The lead midwife and the senior house doctor worked so brilliantly with me that at no point did I feel that anything was going to go wrong. Unfortunately I've moved house since then (100 miles) and am at a new hospital where the only person i've met and liked so far is the gp surgery's midwife.
Would a birth centre still be an option. Dare I say it would a home birth be an option?
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Childbirth
OK, I'll be honest I'm petrified about labour
16 replies
Wills · 10/09/2009 18:06
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