Previous Shoulder Dystocia and 3rd Degree Tear - Now 33 weeks pregnant - CS or Vaginal Delivery??(12 Posts)
Hi - This is my first post on mumsnet so please bear with me.
I am 33 weeks pregnant with my second child and i am very confused about what to do. My previous labour was induced. Folowed by Ventouse, Shoulder Dystocia and 3rd Degree tear - My first baby was 9lbs 13oz. I took a long time to recover and felt very traumatised by what had happened - I felt i had failed and not experienced a real delivery.
I have a consultant appointment booked for next week to decide whether elective c section or vaginal delivery. I am so confused
Firstly - worried about tearing again - maybe worse, maybe less!
Secondly - worried of shoulder dystocia reoccuring - this baby looks big again and i am oh so tiny!
Thirdly - worried that if i choose a c section i will miss out on birth that could be fine and feel eternal guilt.
Please help with any advice
explain all your fears to your consultant, there may be options you can take as and when you need to.
I have had 2 c-sections, the first out cold, second elective and it was a calm, pain free, joyful experience.
As a mum already i am sure you know that the real work starts when you have had the baby, not how you have the baby. There are enough things to beat yourself up about from weaning to gcse's in the years to come, the few hours you spend giving birth are nothing in comparison to the years you will be a parent.
You do not have to fear birth, you do not have to fear c-section birth and you are NOT a failure
Thanks for your response. You are very right about when the real work starts! I will keep you posted on what i finally decide.
I really appreciate your supportive comments
keep asking questions on mumsnet, the silly questions you get in the middle of the night, there will be someone here who can help.
Good first post zanz1bar, my ds was c-sect under GA and I felt totally cheated at first but now I look back and can see that the birth is really just a means to an end!
I had horrible first delivery - 3rd degree tear and subsequent repairs etc, but still dithered for ages about making a decision second time around. I contacted the supervisor of midwives eventually to go through my previous notes to see if there was anything I could have done differently and we decided that it was completely out of my control and it was the instrumental delivery that had really done the damage (this also helped me get rid of the 'failure' feeling - in the notes it stated that I was pushing extremely well but just not progressing).
So then my birth plan became to aim for normal delivery but if I went overdue to elect a section to avoid any induction/epidural/instruments situation. Wouldn't you know, no sign of labour so I ended up with an elective section - which was absolutely wonderful, home 48 hours later, now (12 weeks later) I feel perfectly normal and no horrible flashbacks to birth all going wrong etc - and no feeling of failure, which I had expected as well.
What is important in the end is a healthy mum and baby, how bub gets here isn't such a big deal after all...
If you see my post on shoulder dystocia and second birth, I have got some good advice from others. My story is practically identical to yours, and it was really only when going through my previous notes this time with the consultant that I realise how abnormal that was for a birth, and that I had every right to see it as traumatic as I did. I had a list of about 20 q's for the consultant at my first visit this time, and fair play to her, she answered all as fully as she could. I am going for another scan next week at 37wks, and will then look seriously with her about what type of delivery.
She wants to leave the decision up to me if at all ppossible, which is good - but in ways would be good not to have to make it! I'm going to ask about a trial of labour without intervention, and if intervention is called for, then I would at this point like to opt for a section. Not sure if I will be let do this, but I'll keep you posted.
I really feel for you, and agree with the others - talking it out really does help to make things clearer. I'm no longer worried about having a section if that is what is needed. Like you, one of the reasons I want a "normal" birth this time is to help put the last one to rest, but don't know if I could risk having another one like the last. Maybe a section would help put it right too.
sorry for the long post, hope it helps somewhat.
Christie00 - Your birth plan sounds just like my ideas at present. I too have recently had a birth referral with unit supervisor who went through my notes. I am fully aware that my induction, epidural, ventouse etc all added to the end problems and know it could be so much different this time.
I am also considering booking a c section at 41 weeks to avoid the induction of labour again.
It makes me feel reassured to know how you feel after the section and yes you are right. It doesn't matter how the baby gets here!
Simpletwistoffate - The idea of trial of labour sounds interesting and i may discuss this with the consultant. I think we both feel the same and want a 'normal' birth but are both so scared of what could happen. I sometimes think to myself that it could go perfect and i am so glad there was no section and then as my husband says, it could also go the other way and i wish i had section!! If only somebody would take the decision out of my hands!!
My main problem is that i was given a choice - if they had never mentioned c section i bet i would be having natural delivery with no hesitations! Oh how the mind of a woman works!!
Sorry - long long post!!!
Also, simpletwistoffate - how do i find your post on Shoulder Dystocia xx
look at this page
There are a couple of good and bad second time experiences after a first shoulder dystocia. I have decided that if I do have a natural that I will deffo try not to have an epidural either. Although it really took away the pain last time, I do believe it contributed to the other factors.
The consultant that delivered dd said that unfortunately what happened with me was a series of things that on their own would not have caused a prob, but it was the combination of all that made it so bad - baby was big, I'm short, she was op, never fully engaged, i had epidural & confined to bed thereafter, induction etc... It is unlikely for them all to happen again, but they can't guarantee it.
I'll keep you posted next week.
Just to let you know that i have decided to opt for a vaginal birth and the consultant more than happy to suport my decision. Now i have made a decision it all seems very real and i am now eager to be prepared for this baby!
Thanks for all of your comments x
Had my appointment with the consultant yesterday. I'm opting for an elective section on June 26th, on her recommendation.
It is really due to a combination of all issues. From yesterdays growth scan, there is currently a predicted weight of 10 and a half pounds - and that coupled with the earlier one seems to follow. That and the fact that my spd has left me very immobile at the moment, so all in all for safer delivery of me and baby, opting for section.
Best wishes to you - hope it works out really well. take care.
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