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(15 Posts)
shrub Mon 11-Apr-05 19:47:54

A bit of a dilemma - I am due to have a c-section on 20th of April and my ds1 (5) has recently started school 5 miles away. DH doesn't drive Don't know anyone who lives as far out as we do and taxis will be expensive. I was driving in 9 days last time, but worry the pressure will be on to get him to school as normal and don't know if the c-section will take the same time to recover.
Anyone else had this problem - did you just explain there was no way you could get your child to school? was the school sympathetic etc?
any advice.......

Twiglett Mon 11-Apr-05 19:50:18

ask at the school whether they can put you in touch with any parents who live nearby who might be able to offer a lift for a couple of weeks?

I don't think you should keep him off school if you can avoid it, it is important he keeps his routine, and it will do you good to have some time alone with baby

WideWebWitch Mon 11-Apr-05 19:51:25

Not quite the same but I took ds out of school for a day when dd was born because he was staying at my mum's (she was born on Sunday night) and didn't get back until the next day and I thought he deserved to spend the rest of the day meeting his new sister. The school were fine and asked him to stand up and tell the rest of his class his exciting news. Oh I've just read you think it could be 9 days, talk to them, maybe they can think of someone who can help with the drive for a week or 2?

misdee Mon 11-Apr-05 19:53:09

a bus?

shrub Mon 11-Apr-05 20:01:47

no buses unfortunately - its the middle of nowhere all uphill (otherwise I would have made dh get a child seat for his bike). I have thought of asking school if they know of anyone but worry that I would put that mum/dad on the spot and they would feel obliged to and/or ds1 might not want to get in the car with someone he doesn't know.....
flap, flap, flap.....

tigi Mon 11-Apr-05 20:16:38

You are allowed to take the children out of school for a holiday (reluctantly) for up to two weeks- would this cover it?
I would certainly ask at school though if there are any other nearby parents. If you don't ask, you don't know.

kid Mon 11-Apr-05 20:20:03

You never know, one of the teachers may be able to take him to and from school if it is on their way.

serenity Mon 11-Apr-05 20:20:26

DSs had a couple of days off when DD was born, same thing as you, Dh doesn't drive and I also wanted them not to feel forced out. However I didn't have a C/s so they were back pretty quick. The school was fine with it. We had a lot of births in DS2s nursery year (something in the water!) and I remember that some of the other kids were off for a couple weeks (most of us travel quite far to the school)

LIZS Mon 11-Apr-05 20:23:55

Agree with the others - could you see if there is someone local who could help out. It may not even be a parent but a member of staff who could offer a lift. Perhaps your dh would have to hitch a ride the first couple of days.

What would you do with ds if he has to stay at home and is anyone coming to take care of him while you are away who might be able to help ? How is your dh planning to visit you in hospital if there is no public transport and get you and babe home ?

shrub Mon 11-Apr-05 20:35:53

dh will be looking after ds1 and ds2.during op grandparents will be looking after them for a few hours, then will drive dh and the boys back to our house.
last time dh was there for the birth and then had to pick up ds1 from nursery and look after him till i got home (3 days later). so only the one visit from them while i was in hospital(40 min drive but train and bus would be about 2-3 hours each way).on a positive note it was a very peaceful and precious time bonding with ds2.

milward Mon 11-Apr-05 20:41:18

When is it that children are obliged to go to school? if he isn't required to go then enjoy your time at home. If he does have to go then tell the school the full story and see what they can do to sort it out. There must be some sort of system for when parents can't get their child to school because of medical reasons - could you get the class work from the teacher & do it at home for awhile? Cs can sometimes take longer to recover from - sometimes can't drive for six weeks (check with doc & insurance provider. best wishes.

shrub Mon 11-Apr-05 20:49:26

i'm not supposed to drive for 6 weeks but have no choice. we did have funds for dh driving lessons but house we bought is falling down and the diy won!

milward Mon 11-Apr-05 20:52:10

If you drive shrub - check you're covered insurance wise if your doc doesn't agree to you driving. I did driving lessons three weeks after cs - but had docs approval first so was ok - 4 weeks before cs doc told me to stop driving lessons so I just had to follow her advice.

shrub Mon 11-Apr-05 21:01:09

milward - does you docs approval have any weight re the insurance company - did you have to get written confirmation?
thanks for all the advice - will stop being so british and tell school tomorrow about op and see what options are out there instead of speculating and flapping about!

milward Tue 12-Apr-05 12:47:14

For my driving school it was enough that the doc had said everything was ok. I asked her and she wrote something down in my notes. I didn't have to give any papers over but if there had been any problems at least my cs wouldn't have been a factor. Would ask your doc to be sure as I only know for my situation (as a learner driver then only driving with the driving schools car) plus I would call your insurance provider to see what they think. I think to drive against medical advice can be an issue if there is an accident?

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