second time c-section please help!

[wzmo]

So I am planning a second c section. My first child will be 23 months at the time of the birth. I am so nevous about the recovery but mostly not being able to pick her up Also I would really just love some stories about 2nd c sections ( hopefully mostly positive ) thanks so much. ( plus people who have never had a c setion and think it is "easy" and have lots of advice say things about not going into labor that i may not bond with the baby etc.. ) which just throws me over the edge!!!!!!! any chat would be helpful.

[cheesesarnie]

i had my 2nd 1 year 5 days after first.was fine.was easier than first infact!i felt more relaxed as i knew what was happening.and i felt i knew my limits with regards to picking up dd etc.
when are you due?

[AnnaBeck]

Hi wzmo, I had my second c-sec in July and once again, it was a fantastic experience so please don't worry (although I guess this all depends on your first-time experience!!). The only thing I noticed was that I felt a bit more bruised afterwards but a friend (who had also had 2 c-secs) told me she had felt a bit more pulled around so perhaps I was looking out for it more. I was in hospital for 4 days - I didn't notice that the recovery was any harder than after my DS and I was out and about with the baby by Day 7. My DS was 3&4months when DD came along so was kind of past the picking-up stage. I just made sure I knelt down to hug him or made him stand on a chair!!!

[NellyTheElephant]

Hi, I had my 2nd section with DD2 when DD1 was exactly 24 months (birthdays a couple of days apart). It was a totally amazing experience (planned - so a calm happy experience unlike the horror of my first emergency one). Great to know when it's going to be and arrange childcare etc too. Recovery was amazingly good (I was up and showered unassisted about 6 hrs after the op). I could pick up DD1 pretty easily to be honest and had to constantly remind mself not to incase I pulled something (so I'd just sit down on the floor to cuddle her), but I never had any problem e.g. helping DD1 in and out of the bath (which did involve a bit of unavoidable picking up), you just have to be slow and careful.

I think the whole bonding problem thing people talk about is a load of rubbish, I know loads of people who have had sections and no-one has had any trouble bonding. I was in labour for 2 days with DD1 and it definitely took me longer to bond with her than with DD2 as I was knackered, exhausted and destroyed. DD2 was a breeze as I was relaxed happy and ready to cuddle her.

3rd section due in April all being well.......

[Ceebee74]

I had my second c-section 7 weeks ago - DS1 was 2.5 at the time.

I have had absolutely no problems bonding with either of my 2 boys and I don't feel like I haven't given birth either - to me giving birth is about producing a healthy baby, whichever way that is done.

As regards picking DS1 up, it was really difficult once I got home from hospital as he would stand at the bottom of the stairs saying 'mummy carry' and when I said I couldn't and daddy would have to do it, he would go into meltdown mode This lasted a couple of days and then he got over it and always asked to be carried by daddy without any fuss. I was still able to pull him up onto a chair I was sitting on, get him out of the bath etc. I have just started picking him up from the floor and carrying upstairs (yes DS1 is a lazy bum!) in the last couple of weeks - tis fine!

Recovery - took slightly longer this time I think - I had more twinges for longer but you don't get the same opportunity to rest as you do first time round as you have a toddler to look after aswell.

All in all it was a lovely experience and I don't regret electing for a c-section 2nd time around at all

[McDreamy]

I've had 2 sections and found then both fine. Recovered faster from the second one really alhough had to be very careful with having a toddler around. I was in hospital 48 hours both times and had no complications. I am having my 3rd section in about 4 weeks!!!!!!

[wzmo]

THANKS! I am due in June. Very excited! but of couse now knowing what i am going in for makes me a bit scared. last time it was an emergency, so to walk in and no what is going to happen ahhahahha!!

[strawberrycornetto]

I had an emergency cs first time and a planned second time. I would say I was ever so slightly more sore in the first few days with the second one, but recovery was quick both times. Both my DCs were in special care afterwards so not with me but I still bonded very strongly with them pretty much immediately. You will be fine. My age gap is bigger so can't really help with that.

[spottyshoes]

have asked this on my antenatal thread already but what about all of your scars 2nd time round? probably a dumb question but do they cut always cut the same place? or do you end up with 2 scars? and did you find the overhang worse

[McDreamy]

Used the same scar (had an op when I was 18 so used that scar for the first section) Scar is currently nice and neat, no over hang just hoping they don't mess it up this time as this is my last baby!

[FiveGoMadInDorset]

My second section was lovely, being planned going into hospital and finding childcare was great. My DD was 2 and a half and I do admit I lugged her round the maternity unit, just did it slowly. Recovery was quick. Is that positive enough

[BEAUTlFUL]

My 2nd section was fine. no probs at all. I did feel more rummaging around during the operation, but NO pain. I also got permission from GP to drive after just 3 weeks, so consider asking yours for this if you feel you need more help.

They used the same scar and Doc was keen to say that he had "given [me] a lovely scar". I was about that, just wanted the lovely baby! Overhang is definitely no worse!

[samsonthecat]

My second section was so much easier to recover from than my first. To start with I had not been in labour for so long or in need of a blood transfusion. I bonded with DD2 straight away, much faster than with DD1.
I was skipping down the ward about 5 days later (been home on day 3 but readmitted with high blood presure). Once I was home properly I felt fine but had to keep remembering not to pick DD1 up. I was back doing every day stuff like toddler groups with in 2 weeks. It really all seemed so much easier second time.

[spottyshoes]

Thanks McD and Beautiful that's really good to know. It slightly alters my pro's & cons list re CS2 vs VBAC decision. Hope you get the same good job this time round McD

[BalloonSlayer]

1st section - DS1 - emergency. Was delighted that I was not going to have to go through with having a baby I knew was too big for me.

2nd section - DD - elective. I felt very VERY nervous. Having spinal was very different when not in labour, plus I was very worried about DS1, as I had been the entire pregnancy (DC1 was 17.5 months old and not yet walking, so still quite a baby. In fact as I type, DS2 is 16m and the thought of beig 7.5 months pregnant is )

No trouble bonding. I was told not to carry DS1 up and down stairs but reasoned that I was in less peril carrying a toddler carefully than having to catch a suddenly plummetting one.

Just think carefully about what you are doing when you have to lift your older DC and you will be fine.

Had DS2 by elective section and all was fab. No trouble bonding. Other DCs 7 and 6 by then though, so I wasn't worried.

[wzmo]

I feel much better after reading, Thanks! I think i will still be able to go to 39 weeks and when i went into labor with first she was also 1 week early so it should be about the same. I have never (knock on wood) had to go to a hospital for anything but all the pregnancy check ups ETC so having a surgery like a c section was huge!! so walking in knowing that i am going to go through such a major surgery is VERY scary! so i really do love the positive 2 time arounders! my first c section did go well and my recovery was amamzing so i hope that is a good sign.

[AnnaBeck]

I was more nervous second time round because even though my first c-sec had been planned (DS had very big head!) it was all new. The second time I knew what to expect and so I guess was a bit more nervous (even though I knew it was all perfectly safe). Having said that, I ended up with the same anaesthetist and assistant anaesthetist as with my first so it felt like a reunion!!!

[MrsMattie]

See here for more positive stories, including mine.

I found my 2nd c-section by far a more relaxed, happy experience to my first.

I have recovered more quickly this time (7 weeks post section and bouncing around like normal) but I do put that down to having a proper rest for the first 4-5 weeks. DH / my mum took care of a lot of the childcare and shopping etc. If you can get some help even for that first few weeks I think it makes a huge difference to how speedily you recover, physically and mentally. I appreciate that some people just don't have that help, though, in which case you just have to scale down your daily life big time, do the bare minimum and ride it out with your older child (they won't be scarred for life because they had a few weeks of convenience food and CBeebies on repeat! ).

Good luck.

[AnnaBeck]

PS - meant to say, mine went through same scar, overhang fine. Agree with BEAUTIFUL, I was quite shocked in that I felt A LOT more rummaging around the second time (not painful) but apparently DD was quite high up!!

[midnightexpress]

I had my 2nd cs 14 months aftr my first - in my case it was actually more traumatic because I was going for a VBAC and got a lot furtehr on in the labour (to full dilation) than I had with the first so didn't really know what on earth was going on. But I would imagine a planned section would be positively blissful by comparison, so don't worry about that.

With regards to bonding, I didn't have any problems at all, in fact bfed ds2 until he was nearly 2 and found bonding much easier - I think because I kind of knew what was coming if that makes any sense.

And as for recovery, get as much help as you can - it is difficult when you can't pick up your older child. We lived on the 2nd floor at the time and it was a pita for the first few months weeks, and we were lucky enough to be able to get a p/t nanny for the first 8 weeks or so (no family nearby, and dp was working f/t). If you don't have any possibility of help, I'd suggest getting in touch with Surestart to see if they can help.

[wzmo]

UGHHH!! my mom is killing me with all this, she just doesn't believe in planned c sections and thinks i am messing with the spiritul timing of when the baby wants to come!! this is a hard enough decision to make!!! so needless to say all of your stories really help me to feel as though i am not doing something terrible. my first labour was very very intense and went 36 hours with her still not being able to lower and she was quite big and i never fully dialated even with pitocin, so by the time the surgon/ob came in and saw after 3 hours of pushing that nothing was going on it was a very quick emergency cs. and quite honestly i feel as if a try again and that happens again that it would break my heart. i also still totally feel that i gave birth to her and have no problem with the fact she was not vaginal, even though the last thing i ever thought was that i would have a cs!!! so this is a big deal!! i am sorry to vent. i just feel scared and like i am doing this for convinince when i talk to other people, when all in all or when i am talking to my DH we feel it is the right thing! and the safest. uguguguhhh

[BalloonSlayer]

My Mum was/is a bit like that. She feels that women who have never given birth naturally "miss out." I know a lot of people say that, but my Mum went so far as to say, when a relative (who had been told that she always would need a section to delivera baby at term) had a premature baby who later died, that "at least she had experienced childbirth" .

I shut her up now by saying that I have had enough of labour to know what bloody agony it is and that was quite enough birthing experience for me, and I am far more concerned with getting my baby out safely than anything else. I know that it's perfectly possible to have a safe and wonderful VBAC . . . but I just felt so worried something would go wrong, I couldn't bear the thought of it.

As far as I was concerned my emergency section had given me a "get out of labour free card" which I used with the next two children and knew I wouldn't have to worry about their safety. This did, however, bite me in the arse somewhat as my DD had breathing difficulties caused by being an elective caesarean . . . it does happen sometimes unfortunately. She was fine in the end though.

[EBenes]

My second section was much much easier than my first - recovery, pain, everything. And my first wasnt a bad experience. My 2 year old didn't like me being in hospital much, but that was more to do with having a new baby around. My health visitor told me not to worry too much about lifting her afterwards - she said we were all sewn up a lot better these days - and I started at about 3 weeks, because it was such a faff waiting for people to do it for me. By 4 weeks I was completely completely back to normal - after the first, I think I was still walking a bit slowly.

[Bubbaluv]

Regarding the scar. Apparently they don't actually use the old scar so much as cut it out completely!

[EBenes]

Didn't know that. Wish they'd taken a bit more skin with it.