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need to discuss hosp/homebirth with midwife again..any advice (please!)(21 Posts)
Had opted for a local birthing centre which everyone raves about, BUT a colleague is planning a home birth and I have always really fancied one, didn't think dh would go for it. Talked to him and he's supportive - Two reasons (OK maybe three) I have gone off original choice
1. if need extra intervention will still need to get into an ambulance and go to hosp, would rather just have one trip iyswim
2. (warning, this is really shallow) the birthing centre is far too near where my in laws live
3. last time i had early stage contractions roughly every five minutes from saturday afternoon through to wednesday morning when they broke my waters, so real trouble relaxing and no sleep...if we hired a birthing pool i think it would really pay off if that happened again (anyone know if it's likely to?) used tens last time but don't want to this time because it put me off using the bath to relax (hurt like hell pulling the pads off and also don't like that weird buzzy feeling you get after using it a long time).
ANYWAY, having talked all this over (not seen midwife yet but will soon) saw GP for 22 week check up and she expressed suprise that I was going for a birthing centre, saying that because I had ventouse with my first, and was quite small, was likely to need it again because second babies are often bigger (is this remotely true??) so now I'm thinking I'll probably end up in hospital anyway so might as well plan to... honest views appreciated x
(ps, have been reading up on the homebirth threads..will try to get back on mnet soon but life too hectic at the mo to get on much) Thanks
No idea about second babies but my first was 7lb and my second 9lb 8oz and I managed both at home, despite being 5'3. There are plenty of homebirthers here who had much bigger babies too. I hope pupuce or someone sees this. No-one knows for sure how it'll go but if you're at home you can transfer to hospital whereas you can't transfer from hosp to home.
But second babies are almost always faster and easier! I don't think anyone would dispute that, including your gp.
My GP told me not to have a home birth as i would have to buy a new mattress for the bed. Ignored her and there was no mess!
What I am trying to say is that most GP's dont know a great deal about it. Chat to your midwife.
My second birth was a great deal easier than my first.
I too am sceptical of GP's knowledge on this. I had ventouse for dd1, and am also small, and nobody ever said there was a particular likelihood of needing ventouse again. In fact most midwives I spoke to thought it likely that the reason I ended up having ventouse was exhaustion, due to slow labout, due to stress, due to being in a crappy hospital with unsympathetic midwives (to simplify a bit!). My go told me she wanted nothing to do with me if I went for a homebirth, citing post-partum haemorage (?sp) as her reason, so I ignored her, got an independent midwife through a well-known well-run birthing centre and had dd2 at home. I'm not suggesting you ignore your gp, but am suggesting you talk to different people and ask lots of questions. Ask the professionals exactly what the evidence is for thinking you're more likely to need intervention? A big consideration for me was that I'm only 10 mins drive from a hospital (probably 5 in an ambulance!) so I had my safety net.
Agree - many GPs are notoriously jumpy about non-hospital births so talk to your midwife instead. What were the reasons given for the ventouse first time round?
I would also say talk to your midwife. I did talk a couple of times to mine about homebirth and was finally really taken seriously when I took my husband to my antenatal app and he went on about how mucj I wanted to have our baby at home and how suppotive he was. Sometimes the mw wants to know that the partner is also keen.
Hi Jiminy (source of the yummy chicken cacciatore ) - I highly recommend joining the homebirthuk email support group - its members are midwives and mums who've homebirthed as well as mums-to-be - if you post your query or any other concerns there you'll be amazed at the response you'll get - they're incredibly supportive and well-informed.
I would also say take your GP with a pinch of salt. And good luck - I hope you get the birth you want.
Hi My midwife today asked me if I would like a home birth. I also had ventouse with dd and assumed I'd need to have this baby in hospital but she says thats not the case. She's just delivered a home birth baby last night who had ventouse with her first baby.
I would really like a home birth but I'm having difficulty persuading dh. The idea really freaks him out...you know what men are like!
My first was a vile ventouse in hospital, my second was a far easier labour (as they usually are second time round) and a home birth.
Alicemama, my DP didn't want a home birth at ALL and kept going on about it. I just ignored him - I was the one giving birth, after all
wow, thanks everyone. Katemum I think my dp is most worried about the mess (and that he'll be left to clear up after an exhausting and emotionally draining birth), so I might quote you on that. MI and Alicemama - really encouraging, thanks (think my dp is freaking a bit too, but he's managing to cover it up and be really supportive!) Hatsoff - that sounds a bit like my first delivery, and is really putting me off another hospital birth. Snafu - I'm not entirely sure what reasons were given for ventouse (that's terrible, isn't it?) but I think like Hatsoff it was more the length of labour and that they wanted me to get a move on! Thanks for the link franch
My experience (and also following a thread I started) the chances of needing ventouse or forceps for a 2nd baby is VERY small....
Indeed you would probably have a higher chance of ventouse in hospital whilst at home things would be handled differently and the MW would either be more patient or suggest position chanegs to allow the baby to come down.
I think it is VERY common to have a ventouse for a 1st birth and very uncommon for a 2nd..... I am sorry but the size of the baby really isn't the issue but the way it is coming down the birth canal is more at stake.
Again 2nd time around is much easier.
From what you say - go for a home birth !
Alicemama - McKenzie's husband was also freaked out but have a look at her birth announcement (about 1 month ago)
don't let the mess thing sway your dp. I can honestly, hand on heart, say we dealt with less mess at home with dd2, than we did in the hospital with dd1. In hospital the midwives had to dash off to the next delivery, leaving me on a crumpled up bloodied pile of those horrible plastic-backed huge pieces of cotton wool, which dh and I removed between us. I struggled to the shower on my own (got a bit told off for that!)coz I was so sticky and messy and horrible and ended up dripping blood all over the floow which - for some bizarre reason - my conscience made me clear up. At home I had two midwives (admittedly they arrived late, but that's another story)who ran a bath for me, helped me in, cleaned up the bedroom while I was gone, put clean sheets on, put the messy ones in the washing machine, and made everyone a cup of tea. I didn't deal with any mess at all.
very interesting pupuce...thanks. Do you mind if i add a couple of queries? Last time i had syntocin to 'turn dd around' is that really necessary or is it just to speed things up? I have to say I was v tired by then. Also (and forgive my ignorance in this) from listening to lots of friends, in hosp quite often you'll be told 'the baby is getting distressed' and intervention happens quickly to deliver - if you're at home what would happen?
Hatsoff...think dh was a bit traumatised 1st time around...have to say it was very messy! Have been telling him about all your messages and he's up for it, I think x
Hi there - we really need mears for this as she's a practicing midwife. I am an ex-midwife (not practised for the past three years) so may not be as up to date. Syntocinon is often used to augment labour when things are moving slowly and there can be a variety of reasons for this slowness. Sometimes it's because you are exhausted for whatever reason, perhaps because you haven't eaten, are immobile due to an epidural or continuous monitoring or the baby is in a position that makes labour slower. A slow labour in itself is not a problem if you and the baby are coping well with the slowness. In the past - hospitals have been guilty of rushing in with Syntocinon just because things are moving more slowly than they would like. No better reason than that. In the process they have sometimes been guilty of adding Syntocinon to a labour that is progressing perfectly normally (just slowly) and distressing both Mum and baby as a result.
This is far less likely to happen at a homebirth - for one thing - they cannot give Syntocinon at home and secondly - they are much more inclined to let nature take it's course. As this is your second baby, the chances are that labour will be faster anyway - no matter what the position of the baby is.
In a true emergency situation (and they do happen) if you were at home they would simply transfer you to hospital by ambulance (as they would from a birthing centre). From my time as a midwife I very rarely had to transfer anyone in labour. The two times it occurred were simply because progress was very slow and the babies were showing signs of being tired. In both cases the babies were delivered safely albeit in hospital. In the vast majority of cases there are lots of indicators of a need to go in to hospital and often the decision is based on the whole labour and what has happened rather than just one single event.
wow, thanks amanda..i must say a lot of the responses on this thread are encouraging me to plan a home birth...I just hope I get a positive response from my midwives - the new one we've got was really pro the birthing centre and more natural births, so I'm hoping they will be.
Hi pupice & motherinferior,
I had a good long chat and explained what exactly is involved in a home birth and he's coming round to the idea. I think he realises that I will be more relaxed at home and the care off your midwife is better if you have a home birth as the midwife is totally focused on you and isn't looking after other woman at the same time. Going to record some episodes of hme birth diaries off discovery health to show him. If anybody has any other resources I could use I'd appreciate the info.
I'm a GP and much as I'd hate to disparage my cooleagues but they're not usually the best people to advise reagrding home births as a lot of medics automatically are against them and many GPs haven't really had a lot of obstetric experience especially nowadays. You'll get a much more balance view from a midwife as they see all the home births that go well. I'm going for a home birth with the next one (if there is a next time - new babies are rather effective methods of contraception!! ) and expect a certain amount of disapproval from my colleagues but really can't think of anything more natural and relaxing than having the whole labour in my own surroundings and not have to move to hospital in the middle of labour!
Hmm, must say several of my friends have had really enthusiastic responses from midwives about home births while everyone else has looked at them like they were mad. Thanks - and my 18 m old didn't work as contraception! I couldn't wait to have another, tho starting to feel a bit daunted now..
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