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is second baby without epidural a positive experience/do-able for cowards?

(25 Posts)
Gemzooks Mon 25-Aug-08 12:59:19

Had DS with mobile epi, was fine (though still very painful).

Now in Holland so it is harder to get an epidural (they're very into natural childbirth). So nervous that am considering having DC 2 over the border in Belgium (where I had DS).

Did anyone have epi for first and manage without for the second, and do you wish you hadn't? any advice much appreciated, as am bricking it though only 10 w!

TrinityRhino Mon 25-Aug-08 13:01:37

I had an old fashioned epi with dd1

a mobile with dd2

and nothing but gas and air with dd3

was great no prob at all
I am a certified coward but the anticipation of knowing I couldn't have one was WAY worse than the actual doing

pushchair Mon 25-Aug-08 13:07:40

Two induced labours with epidurals. Fine. Third birth caught me by surprise and I had nothing and it was the easiest. Uncomfortable but not the terrifying agony I always dreaded. I expect tho thet every time is different. Good luck either way.

ellasmum1 Mon 25-Aug-08 13:09:34

my sis had her second baby a few weeks ago and had an epi with her first. She was asking for one this time but the midwife encouraged her to try gas and air and water pool which sis was very sceptical about, but she had baby in water within an hour and was so elated and pleased with herself!
Its usually much easier to do without an epi second time because the labour is usually so much faster!

suedonim Mon 25-Aug-08 13:35:35

I had epi for POP ds1 but had ds2 in a hospital that didn't offer epis. I ended up being induced at 10 days over and produced ds in just over 4hrs, with a pethidine inj about 10mins before he made his unexpectedly rapid appearance. I'm usually a whinger but coped pretty well! smile

findtheriver Mon 25-Aug-08 13:37:38

Second labours statistically are likely to be shorter. Anecdotally a lot of people say they are less painful too (though obviously still hurt!). Your body has done it before. I didnt have epidurals with either of my vbs, but I would say go for it! You get a fantastic sense of ahievement!

Oumasrusks Mon 25-Aug-08 13:49:58

I had an epidural with DD1. I remember thinking when I was in dreadful pain in labour that I'd die if they refused to give me an epidural.

I had gas and air only with DD2 and it was absolutely manageable. I couldn't believe how much less painful it was, compared to DD1's birth, even though my labour was actually longer than the first one.

ElectricFlightAttendent Mon 25-Aug-08 13:57:22

I had one with ds1 and it was all pretty easy.
I planned a home birth for ds2 and it was, for me, terrifying and I found it agony, but then what is birth if not painful -

It was quick though.

I'm glad to have experienced it in a weird kind of way, and that I understand how birth feels without any intervention (well not too much)

I think you'll be Ok. It really hurts though.

ElectricFlightAttendent Mon 25-Aug-08 14:00:58

Not that this is a good thing, but I will add that I felt I had somehow 'cheated' with the epidural. I felt like I'd failed and didn't qualify to say I had given birth, it was that easy.

The second time made me feel quite proud to have survived iyswim. I have noticed I feel more like a real 'mother' this time. I don't know if there is a connection there (for me)

Again, this isn't how one should feel - I have issues with self esteem anyway so that probably coloured it a lot. There is no reason why one ought to feel a failure for having pain relief!!! hmm

morerestneeded Mon 25-Aug-08 14:36:03

I had ep with both births and am planning a homebirth this time. I am a wimp! But have lots of reasons for wanting a homebirth, if i could have an ep at home I would.hmm However, birth2 was much quicker than 1 and am hoping this one will be quicker again!smile Good luck!

lavenderbongo Mon 25-Aug-08 14:36:04

I had an epidural for my first but just had gas and air for second. Yes it did hurt a lot as I felt nothing for most of my first labour. However it was an absolutely amazing experience and I actually felt her come into the world - something i will never forget.
So I think you will be fine - it was a quicker labour (12 hours compared to 28) and weel worth it. Once its over you forget all the pain.

jamescagney Mon 25-Aug-08 14:40:01

had epidural with my lo and am planning to have one again with my second, if it is at all like the first in terms of pain washing over you, puking and feeling you're gonna die!
It is not as if they give you a medal/award for having a baby w/o pain relief, is it?
But I have heard of people who've had totally different experiences with subsequent pgs, <whispers, but I've never met these hardy souls>

Lio Mon 25-Aug-08 14:43:01

epi with ds, homebirth with no pain relief for dd. Yes, it hurt, but then it hurt with epi too, and second birth was LOADS better. If I were to have a third child I would go for a homebirth again.

As an aside, I was fearful before the 2nd birth (don't like hosps) but a doula helped, as did EFT. I will look for a link. I know it sounds weird but it worked for me, and you can do it by phone.

Lio Mon 25-Aug-08 14:45:48

Here it is: CAT me if you want to know more about it; I realise it's not for everyone, but worked for me.

amidaiwish Mon 25-Aug-08 15:41:24

i had an epidural with DD1
only TENS then gas & air with DD2

hadn't planned "not" to have an epidural, just didn't get to the point where i needed it. Also DD2 was faster than DD1 so altogether an easier time. Well, with the epidural i suppose DD1 was "easier" but overall DD2 was quicker so easier, IYKWIM!!!

Gemzooks Mon 25-Aug-08 20:34:14

hi all,
what's EFT, Lio?

TheHedgeWitch Mon 25-Aug-08 20:38:14

Message withdrawn

Lio Mon 25-Aug-08 21:04:35

Stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. Link three posts earlier. Got me in control of the feelings I still had after ds's birth, so that I could talk about it without crying and control the recurrent feelings of fear about giving birth again.

thisisyesterday Mon 25-Aug-08 21:08:05

hi gemzooks. I had an epidural with DS1 and with hindsight wished I hadn't. altohugh pain-wise it was bloody brilliant it had many downsides that I wished I hadn't risked.

ds2 was born at home, with no pain relief whatsoever, and he was back to back.

so, yes. It can be done lol

ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe Mon 25-Aug-08 21:10:11

I was being pressured to have an epidural with DD but tbh I am glad she came before it was done.

Section for baby 1
Tens for baby two
Tens and gas and air for baby 3.

onepieceoflollipop Mon 25-Aug-08 21:13:48

Dd1 was induced and I had practically everything in terms of pain relief. After 27 hours she was a ventouse delivery but I had been prepped for a C section. I had an epidural and it was the right decision at that time.

Dd2 was a completely different experience. I went into labour spontaneously 2 days after due date. I had a fantastic midwife and labour only lasted 3 hours (well the terribly painful bit anyway). Managed with gas and air and had overall a good experience. In transition I screamed for an epi but was too late and I didn't mean it!

ravenAK Mon 25-Aug-08 21:14:50

I am a total wimp & begged for epidurals all 3 times.

With dd1 (dc2) the epi didn't actually work, though. & - I hate to admit this - the 'I am woman hear me roar' rollercoaster primeval endorphin rush was bloody amazing! Was giggling like an idiot for hours afterwards, it was ridiculous.

Still demanded an epi - in good time this time - for dd2 though...

EffiePerine Mon 25-Aug-08 21:16:06

<hijack>
congratulations Gemzooks

no experience with epi for DS, but got yhrouigh without pain relief and I am a complete wuss grin. So much must depend on the baby's position etc...

Heartmum2Jamie Mon 25-Aug-08 21:25:04

I had an epi with ds1. I was found to be 7cm dilated when I arrived and I was told I needed to decide 10 minutes ago if I wanted the epi and as I was a naive & scared first timer, I opted for the epi. With ds2, there really wasn't time as he arrived in less than 90 minutes and to be honest, I really enjoyed the experience, it hurt sure, but in a good way. This time around I am hoping for a homebirth with no epi or G&A, we shall see, lol!

Gemzooks Tue 26-Aug-08 09:38:26

thanks everyone. This has given me a bit more confidence. I"m definitely not planning a third, so could think about it more positively if I thought 'this is my only time to experience real childbirth!'

Have to say it still bloody hurt with the mobile epi, though. On the other hand I've completely forgotten how bad it was. Also, TENS was really marvellous, will definitely use that again..

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