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Childbirth

Please... who coped with labour BETTER than they expected?

41 replies

Salme101 · 14/06/2008 14:32

I'm a first-timer, 40+3 and no signs of labour yet. I really just wondered if anyone could tell me something positive, as it just feels like everyone I talk to and everything I have read on the childbirth board states or implies that labour is an absolutely awful, painful and terrifying experience. I hadn't really worried about it before (didn't see the point), but now I am having a major wobble and feeling really scared. The idea of being out of control and screaming etc probably frightens me more than the idea of pain, tbh.

I know everyone has a very individual experience, but please, please, please - I don't need to know anything more that is negative or scary, as I think fear could really make things worse for me

OP posts:
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TravellingSuze · 14/06/2008 14:40

Hello
My DS is two weeks old today and I am a first time mum. I can really empathise with how you are feeling. I can tell you this much (and not sure what sort of labour you are planning). I went into my labour with a plan to get by with as little pain relief as possible but not to rule anything out if I needed it. I was in pre labour for two days and was pretty tired by the time I was admitted. My baby was back to back and I felt all the pain in my bottom. It did hurt (I assume you want the truth) and after struggling for a while, I asked for an epidural. This may not be what you want, but for me it was the right choice. It gave me back the control and energy I needed and I went on to give birth 3 hours later with no further intervention and minimal pain. In all, I view my birth as an incredibly positive experience.

Good luck.

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StellaWasADiver · 14/06/2008 14:41

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thornrose · 14/06/2008 14:45

Ooh me, me, I found it much easier than I imagined, and was amazed at how soon after I was sitting up having tea and toast. Honestly, don't listen to the negative birth stories right now, put your fingers in your ears and hum very loudly if anyone tries to tell you You'll be fine. I I wish I was about to give birth again, I've only done it once and I'd love to do it again, what does that tell you?

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lenny101 · 14/06/2008 14:45

Hello, I wonder if your thoughts having turned to the birth means it's about to get underway? How exciting.
Until the moment I started pushing I thought I was having a c-section but ds2 had other ideas. It didn't last nearly as long as I thought, didn't hurt as much as I thought and having my baby in my arms (and ds1, then 16mths old, kissing babies head), meant any residual pain was gone in a flash.
Your babies birth is inevitable, enjoy the bits you can enjoy and enjoy telling your special story afterwards.
xx

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belgo · 14/06/2008 14:45

I coped with it better then I expected. I have a very low pain threshold - tend to reach for the anadin at the slightest sign of a headache - but for some reason I got through labour without any medication. It helped that I had a supportive dh, supportive midwife, and everthing was progressing normally - I don't know how well I would have coped if there had been a problem.

It was hugely painful though - but somehow, I just coped.

Good luck Salme.

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bohemianbint · 14/06/2008 14:52

My first labour took 4 hours from start to finish - I had my son at home (on purpose!) and the pain wasn't more than I could handle. It was more the stamina and hard work needed that wore me out!

You will probably surprise yourself and find you cope much better than you think you will - it's almost like nature (or something) kicks in and takes over you. I'll be doing it for the second time in a couple of months and I'm looking forward to it, in an odd way!

Best of luck - and avoid the doom mongers, there's nothing to be gained from being scared out of your wits.

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bladders · 14/06/2008 14:55

I had a section in the end but had a 2 day long labour before that, I was surprised at how manageable the contractions were. It is painful, but you cope. The pains rise and then fall away again so its not constant. in between you feel relatively normal. You have plenty of pain relief options there for if you feel like you aren't coping. I used all the options in the end and each one was really good!!!
Try not to worry, it really isn't as bad as you imagine it is, and I am someone who had what is considered to be a bad time of it. I know of lots of people, and there are loads of stories on here, who have lovely births and feel really empowered by it.
best of luck, I am sure you will be just fine.

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bladders · 14/06/2008 14:55

I had a section in the end but had a 2 day long labour before that, I was surprised at how manageable the contractions were. It is painful, but you cope. The pains rise and then fall away again so its not constant. in between you feel relatively normal. You have plenty of pain relief options there for if you feel like you aren't coping. I used all the options in the end and each one was really good!!!
Try not to worry, it really isn't as bad as you imagine it is, and I am someone who had what is considered to be a bad time of it. I know of lots of people, and there are loads of stories on here, who have lovely births and feel really empowered by it.
best of luck, I am sure you will be just fine.

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wonderstuff · 14/06/2008 14:59

Oh me too, I have really low pain threshold, injections have me whincing, but throughout labour I felt really calm and in control. My body just took over really. My birth plan was to go with the flow, not rule out any pain relief, stay as active as posible and not try to labour on my back. I would love to do it again, feeling of baby coming out was amazing. I did scream, and moo at one point, it seemed to help! Had gas and air and pethadine, which was lovely. Good luck

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Egg · 14/06/2008 15:01

I think I coped quite well with my labours (second one was twins). Both were only about 4 hours though and although they were more excruciatingly painful than I ever imagined I was fortunate in that by the time things really felt too painful to bear I was already 10cm dilated.

Both times when the pain got really bad I said "Ok I want an epidural" and it was too late. Was pleased afterwards though.

I honestly would do it again and again if it didn't mean having to have more blooming kids!

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Egg · 14/06/2008 15:01

Oh and that gas and air is lovely!

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Kaedsmum · 14/06/2008 15:16

I was positive all pregnancy. Then I got induced when I was already in labour as they wouldn't believe I was despite the contractions showing up on the monitor and my waters having broken. The induction pains were much worse than the labour pains. I thought labour was horrific, there's no discribing that sort of pain and nothing can prepare you, and I wasn't allowed an epidural for some reason.

BUT!!!

All the midwives, a doctor and a consultant came in to say that I'd done fantastically because the labour was too progressive, too fast, and the baby was the wrong way which added to the pain. And more importantly, they said I'd coped really, really well and they wish all people coped how I did. So i obviously did cope despite thinking I wasn't. So YES, i coped better than i thought and I would have coped even better if it had been a normal labour.

I went mental off the pain and nothing touched it, but you get through it. It comes in waves so you get breaks at first, and by the end and I passed out between each contraction so it went really quickly for me.

The second the baby came out, i said I'd do it all again and I would. I can't remember the pain now and I've got a gorgeous littlun!

Trust me, it's bareable. And there's no point worrying about it because A) it's going to happen, B)you just get on with it at the time and you manage and it's ok, and c) you won't have much control, you'll just naturally do it.

So chill, it'll be fine. Everyone's got a horror story, including me as you just read, but it's worth it and you will get through it.

Plus if you're not progressing, they'll give you an epidural.

If i can do it with the baby turned sideways, you can too. Mine was not a nice labour at all and I'm offering comfort to you and saying you'll cope, so don't worry!!

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Tanktop · 14/06/2008 15:51

Another positive one here. My labour was extremely fast. Don't get me wrong contraction were mighty painful but I managed to get through the whole experience without any pain relief or gas & air. There were a few moments during the labour that I was tempted to ask for help but managed to struggle through with the support of hubby and medical staff. Eventually was allowed to push at 4.50pm and dd was born at 5.20pm. I even walked back to my bed from the delivery room. I am now hoping 2nd time round will be pretty much the same as am currently 9 wks pregnant.

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maidamess · 14/06/2008 15:53

Ooh Me! Me!

Especially with baby number two which I can equate to having the most satisfyng poop of my life.

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Doodle2U · 14/06/2008 15:55

I LOVED labour!

Honest, especially with my first. Contractions felt like a period pain that went all the way around my body rather than just my tummy and in between each one, no pain. I had a cup of tea etc inbetween some of them.

It's pretty interesting as well.

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Doodle2U · 14/06/2008 15:56

GAS and Air - fab stuff. Should be piped into everyone's house, in my opinion!

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HollyGoHeavily · 14/06/2008 16:01

Labour wasn't that bad for me either. It did hurt (a lot at times) but it was never unmanageable and i always felt in control. My body seemed to just take over and i always felt like I knew what I should be doing. It took me 23 hours from first twinge to the birth and I had a couple of paracetamol, some gas and air and spent a few hours in a water pool.

Try and stay calm - i think your worst enemy in all this is panic because it pushes you into doing things that you might not have done had you had a bit of time to think rationally.

Good luck - it's worth all the pain the moment you hold your baby

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TheRealMrsOsborne · 14/06/2008 16:04

I had two really quick (2hrs) labours, i have a really low pain threshold and thought i'd have everything on offer but i has nothing at all and felt really calm and in control.

Yes it does hurt but it's a productive pain if that makes sense and you'll be amazed at yourself and how clever you are. You go from saying never again whilst in pain to holding your baby in you arms and saying actually that wasn't that bad.

Good luck

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Egg · 14/06/2008 16:05

BTW, with labour no 1 I had a lot of pain from contractions but no pain at all from the actual crowning and pushing out etc (despite a nice tear!).

Labour no 2 the crowning etc overtook the contraction pain, even though DD has the teeniest head ever.

I did of course sob and beg for a c-section during labour but it was all in the heat of the moment, it was great really!

And like tanktop I walked to the ward from the delivery room both times (even pushed my DTs the second time, smiling proudly at everyone ).

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Egg · 14/06/2008 16:06

Sorry, me again....

If you do have gas and air, remember to keep breathing throughout the contraction because if you stop to shout "arrgh" it means you have to take your mouth away from the mouthpiece and then you realise what a fabulous invention gas and air really is as the pain quadruples!

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mom2ava · 14/06/2008 16:18

It's only the last part of labour that is the painful part, but at that stage an end is in sight! I was really luck in that I was in the delivery suite for 30 minutes. No pain relief, but not by choice - rather, it happened too quickly.

If it helps, you forget all about it as soon as you hold your baby!

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Kaedsmum · 14/06/2008 16:26

my labour was 50 hours, but 12 from being induced. I only pushed for 17 mins and my god it feels so good pushing.

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NotABanana · 14/06/2008 16:29

Me, with my second and third babies. The first one was an emergency section.

I felt amazing that here was something I could actually do. I listened to my body and just really went in to myself. I didn't say a word to Dh once I was in full labour and then pushing. It was fab and I would do it again in a heartbeat if I could.

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findtheriver · 14/06/2008 16:43

Me. I wouldnt say I have a particularly high pain threshold, but I wanted to give birth without epidural/pethidine etc due to the risks of other intervention. And I managed fine on gas and air (which is fab btw!!). It does hurt, the pain is like nothing on earth, but it doesnt last for ever, and it's also a different kind of pain, as you know you're giving birth to your lovely baby.

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usernamechanged345 · 14/06/2008 16:59

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