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Giving birth alone

(7 Posts)
Milsplus3 Wed 21-Aug-19 17:56:13

Hi, newbie here after not having any replies from a different forum I thought I’d come here.
I’m pregnant with my third baby which has a different father to my eldest two. The dad doesn’t want to be involved so I am doing it alone. I have little family so support is minimal. I know I will be giving birth alone and I’m fine with that but my concerns are if I can’t find last minute childcare to go into hospital. I have considered a home birth to rule this out, but I did really enjoy the hospital experience before and would prefer to do it that way again if I can. Has anyone had this situation and how did it work out for you?
Also am I likely to receive more support in labour as I’ll be alone? There won’t be anyone to take photographs for me which I’m sad about and not sharing the special moment with a partner will be strange for me. I plan to discuss it at my next appointmenr but your experiences will be appreciated tia

OP’s posts: |
Cashew1 Wed 21-Aug-19 18:00:35

No personal experience but some hospitals offer a service where they can offer you a buddy to support you through the birth in case this is something you are interested in.

Not sure where you are based but this is in London: http://whfs.org.uk/index.php/what-we-do/maternity-mates

Hmmmbop Wed 21-Aug-19 22:48:56

Not sure about the child care issue, it'll depend on a few factors- age of your kids and how long your labour is likely to be. But I'd be asking kids dad/friends/neighbors/ local babysitters if they'd be able to help in an emergency.

My waters broke, but no contractions I went to hospital, DH was sent home and I stayed and was scheduled for a c section in the morning. My labour started unexpectedly progressed very quickly, DH almost didn't make it (arrived as they cut me open). The staff were wonderful, had a midwife holding my hand, chatting to me, counting with me, advocating to the consultant for me. I felt totally looked after.

All the best.

Dontfuckingsaycheese Wed 21-Aug-19 22:57:30

I had ds in a midwifery led unit. Was asked very early on will you have someone with you or do you want a midwife as your birthing partner? So. On the day it was just me and her (I managed to snag the most amazingly fabulous one in the team) and she made it the most amazing experience from start to finish (though it hurt and it got a bit scarry) - like having my best friend there but who knew exactly what she was doing. It was only me and her on the ward. A student joined us at the end and took photos. I know that's not always the case though. Not all birthing mothers are that lucky.

Dontfuckingsaycheese Wed 21-Aug-19 23:00:12

If you're really planning on going to hospital you'll need childcare, backup and backup backup!! If I were to do it again I'd maybe go for home birth.

How about a doula? Do people still have them?

stucknoue Wed 21-Aug-19 23:04:26

In emergency social services would put your kids into temporary foster care but it's far better to find a friend to take them obviously - the hospital won't be that phased by you turning up with kids and no childcare, you won't be the first. I know hereof women are giving birth alone they usually assign a student midwife to them so they have extra attention

stucknoue Wed 21-Aug-19 23:05:16

Ps staff will be more than willing to take photos

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