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No desire to push during birth

(19 Posts)
frankiefirstyear Wed 24-Apr-19 06:14:20

Speaking to a friend the other day and I wondered how many women have experienced VB with absolutely no desire to push at all? I have never heard of this before (and neither had she!) and always been told things like 'once the urge is there you won't be able to stop'. She said the midwives didn't seem to realise and she was waiting for the urge to come on and it was only when they began to get concerned about her not getting the baby out fast enough she clicked on that she was at/past the point where she was meant to be pushing! All was fine because she told them to tell her when she was meant to push and got her baby out with no issues to the baby after just a couple of pushes. All she had was gas and air but they took that off her to encourage pushing faster.

OP’s posts: |
PorpentinaScamander Wed 24-Apr-19 06:31:00

I had no urge to push with ds1. I just pushed when they told me to. The mw was a bit of a bitch and couldn't seem to believe I wasn't pretending (she had previously called me a little girl, and told me labour doesn't hurt that much so stop making a fuss)

Ds2 was a shock because I couldn't resist the urge and I thought '"oh... that's what she was talking about before"

Seekingwellness Wed 24-Apr-19 06:34:20

I've had 3 children. Never had the urge to push with any of them.
1st - induced with drip and had epidural. Slightly above average birth weight.
2nd - spontaneous birth, only gas and air though with gaps in using it. Very heavy birth weight.
3rd - spontaneous birth, only gas and air (with gaps in use), fully dilated for 2 hours with no urge until the pain got so bad that i just decided to crack on with pushing and out came another large baby.

Really wanted to experience the urge everyone talks about but had zero! When i was fully dilated with 3rd the midwife said i could crack on pushing then but i chose not to as i wanted to hold on for the urge but had to give up in the end!!

eBaysLikeMyFamily Wed 24-Apr-19 06:37:21

I didn't have an urge exactly my body just did it, I described it like throwing up but you know downwards. Not once did I consciously push and when the placenta needed to come out I had no more contractions, urge to push or involuntary pushing just nothing. I realised months later that it didn't even occur to me to try and push the placenta out, it was pulled out be a Midwife eventually and I refused the injection.

AfterLaughter Wed 24-Apr-19 06:38:29

#1 zero urge to push. Long drawn out labour. Back to back and the head was in a weird position. I couldn’t push. I had no idea what they meant by push. 4 hours of pushing followed by forceps.

#2/3/4 - Couldn’t have avoided pushing. Totally different birthing experiences to #1. Transition hit me like a tonne of bricks each time (hadn’t experienced that first time either) and all 3 were born with very little effort.

BendydickCuminsnatch Wed 24-Apr-19 06:39:31

Hmm well I did 1 or 2 pushes in the corridor, couldn’t help it and was amazed by it!! But then I had to have forceps and was like ‘I can’t feel anything, i don’t understand!’ 😄 so they had to tell me when to push. So I can believe having no urge at all is a thing! That was with absolutely zero pain relief u fortunately (forceps, ouch!)

stucknoue Wed 24-Apr-19 07:13:11

With dd1 I needed a bit of coaching, there wasn't a big desire, but dd2 I dictated to my midwife and she was pretty much superfluous

fourquenelles Wed 24-Apr-19 07:45:03

Thirty years ago and I had no desire to push despite being 7 cms dilated after 1 contraction and fully dilated an hour later. DD would still be up there left to my own devices. I had to be told when to push.

I thought I was odd so many years later it's good to find that I am not.

DippyAvocado Wed 24-Apr-19 07:52:44

No I didn't get the urge at all. Consequently pushing was very hard work and eventually DC was born by ventouse. In both labours, the babies have been positioned near my spine and I have contractions only in my back so I wonder if this has anything to do with it.

Teddyreddy Wed 24-Apr-19 07:56:02

I had no urge to push with DC1 but put it down to having an epidural. DC2 all I had was gas and air - I still had no urge to push. The midwives got me to stand in the end (hanging onto DH) which finally got things moving. Like a pp both were big babies, I wonder if that has something to do with it?

Fairylea Wed 24-Apr-19 07:58:38

No urge to push at all and didn’t have a clue what I was doing when they told me to!

KnitterOfSocks Wed 24-Apr-19 07:59:09

Nothing with first baby - pushed when told. Second and third OMG, was so intense. Although number three was a 45min start to finish one push job...

Thethingswedoforlove Wed 24-Apr-19 08:01:01

No urge to push with either dd1 or dd2

notangelinajolie Wed 24-Apr-19 08:05:17

Of 3 births only one was what I'd consider a natural normal birth. I had no urge to push whatsoever. The midwife kept telling me to let her know when I felt the urge to push but it never happened. My body kind of took over and one huge contraction and baby literally slipped out.
The other 2 were epidural and I was totally numb so didn't feel a thing.

Stuckforthefourthtime Wed 24-Apr-19 08:07:36

I only had the urge to push with two of my four. All were fine.

Ohyesiam Wed 24-Apr-19 08:16:30

#1 no urge to push. Spontaneous delivery, gas and air only. I didn’t know what they meant by push, my body just did it. Couldn’t push the placenta out, it was like shouting into the void, there was just nothing there. Anyway it slithered out once they tried to give me the iv.

#2 urge to push, but mostly just sort of stood back and watched my body do it. I remember the contraction that got his head throughmycervix was like 3 massive blows downwards. Not painful, just really powerful.

UndercoverLauren Wed 24-Apr-19 09:19:32

I had no urge to push. I'd been in labour for 3 days so I think my body was too exhausted to function properly. Forced myself to push during contractions, which was blinding agony. After 2 hours of this, I was relieved when they took me into theater and got him out with a spinal block and forceps.

WobniarRewolf Wed 24-Apr-19 09:35:41

No urge to push. I could feel pressure, but could ignore it.

Five hours of pushing later, we had a (failed) ventouse attempt and (successful) forceps.

I guess that the upside for me was that until they started the interventions, I didn't need any pain relief - it hurt, but not unbearably, even after they put me on a syntocinon drip to try to make my contractions stronger.

Also couldn't get the placenta out and ended up with a haemorrhage. It's like my body just didn't react properly to the hormones that make you push.

Prettyvase Wed 24-Apr-19 10:55:04

Go with the flow and don't push unless you have the urge or you could end up with piles the colour and size of large red grapes.

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