Second labour speeds, need to know!

[MrsTmilknosugar]

After having a debrief today i have had a lot of questions answered about DD’s arrival 8months ago but it has raised a worry in my head that the midwife couldnt really answer.
DD was a precipitate (?) birth less than 3hrs from waters breaking to delivery at 36weeks. Now i am worried that it will be even faster and possibly sooner next time?!
she also emphasised packing the bags earlier, tell the hospital as soon as you call how fast and early this one was, don’t chance driving ourselves if my contractions start before we are in the car, call an ambulance instead, dont worry about childcare they can accommodate in this circumstance.
In all honesty i feel like today has been the first acknowledgement (and for me realisation!) that i suffered a trauma my brain has been protecting me from and thats why I don’t remember anything after arriving at the hospital. I even found out that because it was so fast my uterus didnt get a rest between contractions and was exhausted so didnt pass the membranes properly afterwards and this probably caused the womb infection a&e discovered 9days later. It could be why i felt i struggled to connect with her and to breastfeed who knows?
My hv clearly knew before me that i had mentally struggled with this birth and what happened and that i needed a debrief and i am so glad she told me to get one but this one thing is already playing on my mind!
I havent even started to process the last birth and am starting to worry about the next one which isnt even on the cards yet😕
I guess i just want to know how your second labours compared to your first length-wise?
I’m Hoping i can shut this nagging feeling up before it gets worse!

[Pinkkahori]

I had a fast first labour. It was under 4 hours from the first little twinge to delivery. I had a retained placenta. The cord broke away before the placenta delivered and i was sent to theatre for manual removal.
When I was pregnant with dc2 I was nervous about how fast second labour would be. The hospital was close to one hour away.
At one point my consultant recommended reviewing me for induction at 37 weeks but ultimately I decided against that.
I went into labour naturally at 41 weeks. Luckily it was at night and Mil was there to babysit dc1.
We had a stressful drive to the hospital and by the time we arrived I was fighting the urge to push.
Once I was in the delivery room dd was born after 3 pushes! Entire labour was just under 2 hours.

[Pinkkahori]

Sorry that was very long and didnt do anything to calm your worries. I felt more in control the second time round even though it was a lot quicker.

[MrsTmilknosugar]

No lol but i want to rationalise it in my head rather than fob it off with probably’s and hearing that people felt more in control and knew the stages as they happened is a help!
Thankyou! x

[Pinkkahori]

I was fairly traumatised after my first labour mainly due to the fact that I wasn't believed. I arrived at the hospital and was examined and told I was only 3cm. They tried to make my DH leave but i persuaded them to let him stay. Within 30 minutes I had a massive urge to push. It happened so fast and i was coping so well that the midwife did not believe me. I really had to argue to get her to examine me again and when she did dd was crowning.
The second time round I knew my instincts had been right before so I was a lot more confident.
I think we are trained to believe that first labours are so long and arduous that it's a shock when it happens differently.

[LadyCassandra]

My second was fast, although I had a stop-start labour like DS1.
This might help but I know two friends who recently didn't make it to hospital with their second babies (within 2 weeks of each other too!)
They both had longish labours first time round.
I wouldn't take any chances and just go in at the first sign of a contraction!

[MrsTmilknosugar]

Oh gosh! I cant imagine not being believed, that would definitely be hard to process. Especially by someone who is trained for “all eventualities” and is supposed to be the one person you can always trust in that situation. Did your experience affect you during your second pregnancy? Im glad you felt more confident that time, it gives me hope i will too.
I feel like such a weight has been lifted today, like i didnt even realise what i was struggling with, or even how much but now i realised i was scared and confused. Its not a memory as such but when ive tried to think about it thats what i was feeling but i was so misaligned i couldnt even properly identify that!

[Pinkkahori]

I think worrying about how fast it would be second time round affected more than not being believed did because when I had time to process it I knew my own instincts were right and it gave me faith in myself.
I remember worrying a lot about what would happen if I went into labour at home alone with dd1 while DH was at work.

[MrsTmilknosugar]

@ladycassandra eeeeek that is a big surprise for them!
I didnt have any contractions (that i could feel) until we arrived in the hospital carpark then they ramped up very quickly from there.
My waters just went as i got into bed so i called and they said come in as youre only 36weeks so i dont know if i would have that as a warning next time 😟

[AncoraAmarena]

My first was born in 5 hours, from waters breaking before any contractions - and then only took that long as he moved back to back and got a bit stuck.

My second was born in 90 minutes from first twinge and only took two pushes to come out. You definitely need to be prepared for your second to come very quickly. I was told to lay on the floor with my bum in the air if labour started when I was on my own.

Good luck!

[Farmerswifey12]

I also had a very fast 1st labour of about 3 hours, arrived at hospital at 10cm and an hour of that was pushing. Luckily no problems.

My 2nd labour was actually longer of about 7 hours (maybe more as it was during the night and I had felt twinges but managed to sleep through) but the pushing stage was much much faster. There was an 8 year gap so not sure if that made any difference to length of labour. 3rd labour was about the same length as my 2nd though I was induced, and pushing stage even quicker, about 4 pushes.