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What happens to the baby if mum becomes ill during labour/Just after

(36 Posts)
Flamingo19 Tue 07-Aug-18 17:37:27

Only asking as the thought entered my head and couldn’t find much info on the internet. Say the mum became very ill, life threatening, ended up in intensive care etc, is the baby handed over to the father to care for?

Dreamingofkfc Tue 07-Aug-18 17:50:46

Yes, or whoever is there as support. Usually, well where I work, (and this is rare) if the mum was to go to intensive care, it's usually for a 24-48 hour period and dad and baby would have a room on either labour ward or postnatal and be supported until reunited with mum. During that time baby is usually taken to see mum.

wowbutter Tue 07-Aug-18 17:55:07

One of my sons was born at 10.30am and I didn't get back to the ward until 1.45pm. I was under anaesthetic and he was taken to his dad on the postnatal ward where they waited for me.

lizzybennett1926 Tue 07-Aug-18 18:48:50

In my case I didn't see my ds2 for nearly two weeks as I was unconscious in ICU. My son was critically ill as well in NICU he was born at 24 weeks. As a single mother I was allowed to nominate people. my mum and one of my brothers in my case, who were allowed to visit and sit with my son as a 'parent' would, until I was well enough. As soon as possible I was shown pictures of my boy and then wheeled in to see him. There's a picture of me lying in my hospital bed reaching in to his incubator with him gripping my finger.
The hospital were absolutely fantastic and facilitated as much contact as possible while we both recovered.

Canwejustrelaxnow Tue 07-Aug-18 18:51:42

I didn't see my ds for a while as I had a GA. He went straight to dh. I didnt even know I'd had a boy. It can still upset me now, as it's not how it's "supposed to be".

ASqueakingInTheShrubbery Tue 07-Aug-18 20:00:44

A friend became very ill with complications of childbirth. Her baby went home with Daddy. The baby wasn't ill, and the mum was too ill to care for her, so baby went home and mum followed a week or so later.

triballeader Wed 08-Aug-18 08:08:12

My eldest son [APH followed by a life threatening PPH during a preterm em c/sec] he was handed straight to the pead's as they cleared the theatre. Very vague memory of husband being thrown out of one door and son being taken to NNICU. Hospital staff & husband cared for my son but bought him to visit me every day. Cannot remember the first three days of his life.
Eldest daughter VBAC but had another severe PPH. Midwife Baby handed baby straight to husband to look after as she was a bit busy till the emergency team responded. Hubby looked after daughter for three hours till consultant got the bleeding slowed.
Third son. Was v. ill on antenatal ward. Had a planned c/sec under a GA in a theatre filled with various teams and the runner from the tranfusion services waiting outside to fetch more blood. Baby okay -I avoided the plan to admit me to ICU but needed HDU so son was looked after by husband with help from staff. I needed help to care for my son for three months after. Many thanks to my mum for looking after all my kids during that ghastly time!
Second unplanned daughter and absolutely my last child due to childbirth being so darn risky for me. Careful planning meant I only had a mod PPH from a planned C/sec. I had hoped this time I might get to hold a baby soon after delivery but Elly was teeny [> 0.4th] went into hypo-thermic shock and it was an age before we heard her kitten like cry. Even my hubby could not hold her. She spent a few days being looked after on transitional by staff but was transferred to BCH as she was not thriving and they suspected she may have Silver Russel or a nasty metabolic disorder.

IF you think you may have a high risk delivery its worth talking to the hospital team caring for you. My Ob's team went above and beyond the extra mile to do all they could to minimise the risks I faced from VwB's [bleeding disorder] As it was very clear I was high risk the lead consultant sorted out pre delivery visits to NNICU and a specialist support midwife who could help me both prep for and debrief after.

ohgodnotyouagain Wed 08-Aug-18 08:38:31

My DD was left with DH when they took me to theatre after delivery smile then he and my Mam were called to meet me when I was in recovery.

PowerPlayed Wed 08-Aug-18 08:45:57

In the immediate term, dad or whomever is supporting the mother.

I have a very clear recollection of DD being handed to DH who was trying to comfort me and him being directed out of the way and told "you need to look after your DD now".

I know DH was very conflicted over who he should prioritise but realistically there was nothing he could do for me.

Roomba Wed 08-Aug-18 08:57:58

My cousin was taken to ICU after having her son. He also needed a minor but timely operation, but there were no free NICU beds in the hospital. So my cousin went to ICU and the baby was transferred by ambulance to another hospital halfway across the country - his dad went with him and stayed with him until my cousin was well enough to be transferred to the same hospital a few days later.

It was horrible at the time - I remember her phoning in floods of tears because her MIL had driven to see the baby and support her son. My cousin was gutted her MIL had spent time cuddling her baby before she'd even had a chance to see him or hold him. Ten years later, she knows her partner needed support with the new baby and it was just a few days out of the whole of her son's life. She's just thankful they were all well in the end now.

thismeansnothing Thu 09-Aug-18 22:32:26

I had a GA but DD stopped in theatre/recovery with me. I had breathing difficulties afterwards and took a while to come round so was kept in recovery ages in no fit state to even hold DD. DH didn't see either us for a good few hours when we were brought back to the labour Ward together

AdventuresRUs Thu 09-Aug-18 22:45:20

I ended up in ICU but the general hospital was across a road from maternity.... the baby was just left in maternity sad Husband just went home (!!!). Apparently he was told to go home - the midwives kept the baby. I later met a midwife - due to going in again with tongue tie - who had been sat with my baby on her lap all night! She'd been cuddled at the nurses station. I'm so sad she was "abandoned" for the first day of her life but so relieved when I found out the baby had been cuddled.

KitchenFloor Fri 10-Aug-18 18:28:26

Not quite in the same league but my eldest was forceps and they had been worried about him at the end of the labor so they carted him off to be checked over, I was in theatre being sewn up. If we'd thought about it we would have agreed that husband follows baby at all times (we could hear him crying after a minute or so but didn't know where he was). Luckily both of us were fine and neither needed ICU etc.

imip Fri 10-Aug-18 18:31:43

A friend of mine had a very bad time after birth and was induced into a coma for weeks. I think she was in hospital all together for well over a month. Her dh took the baby home and they got a maternity nurse as I think they expected the worse for her.

She is fine now.

popocatepetals Fri 10-Aug-18 18:38:42

My dd1 was whisked off to the neonatal unit, complete with DH, while they sorted me out. I couldn't see her for several hours, and they brought me a polaroid of her in the incubator.

ThrownMuse Fri 10-Aug-18 18:40:48

I had to have a GA after an emergency C section: DD was back to back but no one realised, and I went into shock after a v v long and deeply traumatic labour.

I didn't see her for 3 hours after she was born but she was with DP. No harm done, but I still get very upset and feel like I failed her.

flowers to everyone who had a tough time.

Are you ok, OK?

ThrownMuse Fri 10-Aug-18 18:41:30

OP, that should say!

smerlin Fri 10-Aug-18 18:41:36

I was in HDU and baby came with me! They asked if I wanted to try to feed her or if not, said they would care for her while I slept while having blood transfusions. DH was sent home!

BretonStripe Fri 10-Aug-18 18:47:41

I was put in an induced coma 12hrs after my c-section, and didn't meet my baby til he was nearly 2 weeks old.

He'd been in SCBU for a few days having precautionary antibiotics, then went home with dh. Family members helped look after the baby when dh was visiting me in ICU.

BertieBotts Fri 10-Aug-18 18:55:44

Usually whoever was with you to support you during birth, whether that is a partner, friend, mum, sister etc would still be there so they would ask them.

If it happened a little bit later or you have nobody with you then they might ask if you have a husband/next of kin or start calling around your family. I can't remember if there's an emergency contact section somewhere on maternity notes? It's quite likely this could be traced through police etc if necessary.

Are you worried about an absent father or abusive partner? You could just refuse to give any details (after all, as far as they know you might not even know who he is) and/or tell them that the baby is not to go to their father/your husband in this (rare) situation, especially if you can provide an alternative emergency contact they could use instead.

I expect in the event that the father is unknown and you have no emergency contact or family, the baby would be cared for temporarily by staff and a short term emergency foster placement would be sought by social services with a view to reuniting you once you are well again.

800msprint Fri 10-Aug-18 19:06:37

I was on hdu for 2 day's after ds1. Was v scary as I knew I was very poorly but that I'd just had my baby and I was panicking about how to look after him. The nhs staff were beyond wonderful. They cuddled him loads when my husband wasn't there, helped me try bf/get my milk going, laid baby on me frequently and we're just there 24/7. I mean in a way in hindsight I was lucky as I was fine and also had 121 midwife care and support. Vv scary but the midwives and nurses are just amazing and will go above and beyond to look after you and your baby

AdventuresRUs Fri 10-Aug-18 19:29:16

When i was stepped down from ICU to HDU I had my baby with me - 1 to 1midwife care makes a difference I guess. They werent able to have a baby in ICU.

shudder. 6.5 years on it makes me feel funny.

tinytemper66 Fri 10-Aug-18 19:39:50

My mum suffered from a stroke when she gave birth to my sister and I in 1966 (I realise how much things may have changed). She was in hospital for months. I was in SCBU for a few weeks as I was so small.
When we were well enough to go home, my dad, grandparents and aunties looked after us.

differentkindofpenguin Fri 10-Aug-18 19:55:27

Our maternity hospital does not have adult ICU, so if you're sick you get transferred to the main city hospital. If baby stays in NICU back in the maternity hospital, once the woman is well enough she can access an app where midwives put on pictures of the baby and write little notes, kind of like class dojo app schools use, not the same as having your baby to cuddle, but still nice. and nurses like to coo over the pictures
If baby goes home- either with dad, or mums parents, once mum is well enough we make every effort to find her a private room, and turn a blind eye to visiting times, so baby can be brought in as much as possible or practical. We have a fab outreach midwife who is great for advice and support. We once supported a lady to express milk.

AdventuresRUs Fri 10-Aug-18 20:05:02

The app sounds fab. I got sent a polaroid but I didnt like it. I was lying immobile and had a photo of a bay I didnt recognise/hadnt met and just wanted to be allowed to see.

On the positive though a midwife did come across with the intention of helping me express/had a milkimg machine. However she let the baby lie on my stomach and was so calming and patient - it really did the baby crawl and latched on. It was incredible.

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