Hi all,
My first post on Mumsnet - hope I’m doing it right.
I had DS 2.5 years ago and am due with my second child in 3 months.
With first DS my waters broke and 18 hours later I was only 4cm and not progressing further so I was given the induction drip which successfully got me to 10cm fully dilated within a few hours and ready to push. I pushed for about 1.5 hours but to no avail. Baby was not coming out/stuck. I was rushed to theatre not knowing whether they would do an instrumental or c-section. Once we got there and they assessed me they decided an urgent c-section was required.
My little boy came healthily and we were pleased but I struggled emotionally to come to terms with having a c-section as I had my heart set on a vaginal birth and is something that as a woman I feel is important for me to experience.
So I met with the obstetrician who delivered my son today to discuss the birthing plan/options for my #2 due in 3 months. To my huge disappointment and devastation, he was extremely strongly encouraging me to opt for a planned c-section. He felt that a VBAC may not be successful for me because the reason for my first c-section was not a one-off occurrence (such a fetal distress) or a slow progressing labour. I still needed a c-section after getting to full dilation and pushing for a while, possibly suggesting that the shape of my pelvis was not allowing the baby to pass through effectively. Something he thinks may be likely to happen again (although no one knows until you get to that point).
He acknowledged that we would not know until I tried but if I tried a VBAC and then induction or emergency c-section occurred then this could have serious risks for myself and my baby.
I am so torn between my personal desire for a VBAC so I feel fulfilled as a women but now can’t help but think whether I would be selfish to go for this when I know full well what the risks would be. I would not be able to forgive myself if something went wrong with a VBAC and I knew it was because I went against medical advice because of my personal desire to deliver vaginally.
All I read all over the internet is how much you should push for a VBAC if you want it and don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise. Does this mean I should go against the advice of a well trusted and hugely experienced doctor?
I read constantly of women saying a VBAC was empowering for them and helped heal their trauma and guilt from their first c-sections. This is what I desperately wanted for myself but I just cannot see logically see I can go against the advice of a doctor with over 30 years experience who I trust and value his opinion, and instead take the risks of a VBAC as he explained them.
I feel like I have no options left and that this and God-willing any future children I have will all have to be by c-section. I don’t know how I will come to terms with this. :(
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Childbirth
Advised not to go for VBAC and am devastated
116 replies
Kaito16 · 13/06/2018 22:36
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