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Got questions about giving birth? Know what to expect and when to expect it, with the Mumsnet Pregnancy Calendar.

How to mentally prepare

(6 Posts)
KittyWindbag Mon 17-Apr-17 01:40:50

Firstly I should say I live in Asia so the medical attitudes and practices to birth are slightly different.

I'm 35 weeks and my baby is still in breech position. My doctor said that if baby is not turned by 37 weeks she will book me in for a c-section between 38-39 weeks to avoid me going into labour. I had all my blood and urine pre work for that today just in case.

They will not attempt ECV and I'm ok with that as they are not practiced enough in it so have no success rate.

The thing I'm bothered about most is not knowing how to mentally prepare myself. If i show up for a c-section and baby has turned on the day they will send me home. But by then I'd have heated myself up for the operation! I'm trying to focus on natural birth as my goal but I feel a bit adrift. I wish baby would just get had down so I didn't have to worry.

KittyWindbag Mon 17-Apr-17 01:41:48

*geared myself up
*wishcbaby would get head down

Gaggleofgirls Mon 17-Apr-17 01:57:45

Look up hypnobirthing. Whether you do labour or csection the relaxation methods will be great for staying calm and focused.
I thought it was utter rubbish when I watched a load of YouTube things but it was great for keeping me calm and controlled the pain too.

My DD2 was breech then not then turned back during labour. She came naturally with no pain relief not because I'm some martyr (totally drugged up for DD1!) but because the breathing exercises made me feel relaxed and really focused my mind away from the pain.

GinSwigmore Mon 17-Apr-17 02:51:15

It depends on the following:
Are you an ex pat/do you speak the language?
Do you have support with you for either outcome?
Is this your first child?
Do you have pain relief options available to you?
I had gestastional diabetes and was told a c section might be a possibility but then it wasn't necessary. I was disappointed tbh. Similarly one of the worst things with my first was going to be sent home again as my waters hadn't broken. Very anticlimatic. Same as going past the estimated delivery date by ten days with one of them.
I am not sure how you can prepare with the uncertainty: all you can do I guess is be pragmatic in terms of putting it down to fate wrt the op - either it will take place or it won't. If baby turns then you can think more about the kind of birth you want then (I found natural birth challenging and with midwives in a foreign tongue in a foreign place very challenging).
If you are having the op then the decision is out of your hands at that point. You can't do anything about that. So...making sure you have your bag packed/you have read threads on here about post-section tips/some batch cooking in freezer. Sorted.
Then if baby has turned you can refocus on your original birth plan, while knowing that such plans are always subject to change. shamrock You might feel disappointed that you have one/two more weeks to wait. That's understandable. Relief or disappointment, either reaction understandable.
It's all up in the air right now so I would control what you can: bag/birthing partner/further reading. The baby might be a late turner. You might go into labour spontaneously before 39 weeks.

KittyWindbag Mon 17-Apr-17 03:34:12

Thanks gaggle, I've been using a hypnobirthing app for a while. I'm not sure if it's useful or not. Maybe YouTube vids are better.

Ginswig, I'm an expat but my husband is native here and it's our first baby. My doctor speaks perfect English but the other staff at our hospital speak just a little. I'm not competent enough in the language to get through labour in it! But my doctor has promised to be on call for me.

Whatever happens I will have some support as my mum will come out to see me a few weeks after my due date and I'm booked to stay in a maternity recovery unit for a week afterwards which is a big thing over here.

I'm trying To remain calm about it and maintain the attitude that whatever will be, will be. I just wish I knew which way it was going to go. I haven't packed my bag yet. Maybe that's a good way to help me prepare myself. Once I see the things physically sorted into a bag it might help me feel like I have som control.

Blossom789 Mon 17-Apr-17 09:51:07

Whilst you can wish you knew what would happen you can never predict child birth. Your little one may turn but it's probably a greater chance they won't. Rather than focus on the birth focus on the arrival of your little one.. the process by which it will happen doesn't really matter and you'll have plenty of support it's when little ones here that's the main thing.

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