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Will I make a plan with midwife?

(23 Posts)
justanotheryoungmother Sun 15-Jan-17 21:11:32

Hi everyone,

I'm currently 24 weeks pregnant with my first, and my next midwife appointment is the 14/2. I was wondering if I need to make a plan, so to speak, about how I'd like to have the baby, what painkillers etc, and if I'd have to clear it with the midwife?

Thanks for any help smile

mlr1uk Sun 15-Jan-17 21:21:41

Hi, I've been wondering the same. Am 31weeks and midwife hasn't discussed so far..... confused

SheepyFun Sun 15-Jan-17 21:35:11

When I saw the midwife at 36 weeks, she suggested I write a plan before my next appointment at 38 weeks. Then she examined me and discovered DD was transverse, so it was a planned section. I think she'd have gone through the plan at 38 weeks, but I was hospitalised before then.

PastysPrincess Sun 15-Jan-17 21:37:03

In my maternity notes there were a few pages at the back for your birth plan (not sure if all trusts are the same) if nit you can just write one out.

It is a good idea to run it by your midwife so that you can check if your expectations are realistic etc.

All I would say is be flexible about your plan as childbirth can be unpredictable.

soundsystem Sun 15-Jan-17 21:39:33

If you go on the NHS website, there's a birth plan template you can use that gives you various questions to think about, including pain relief. You can then discuss that with your midwive. In my first pregnancy I was asked to fill it in around 30-something weeks. This time round we discussed the plan at my 36 week appointment (not NHS).

LemonyFresh Sun 15-Jan-17 21:44:33

My 36 week appointment discussed my birth plan but of course you can do you own research and write down notes to discuss with the midwife.

mum2be88 Sun 15-Jan-17 21:51:37

My midwife has told me to book a double appointment next week (36 weeks) and she will help me compose my birth plan

Brighteyes27 Sun 15-Jan-17 21:54:56

I would look at options but please be flexible and realistic. I was terrified of child birth had no real plan thought I might try the birthing pool if it was free but other than that I would go with the flow. The birthing pool was fantastic to labour in like a soothing warm bath and you can move around to whichever position is comfier. I was lucky enough to have two natural labours but ended up having to come out of the pool towards the end of my labour due to concerns over babies.
However, a friend who was due the same time as me had a perfect labour plan but unfortunately something went wrong and she felt like a failure as she didn't get to have her idealised labour plan. She then got severe mastitis and couldn't breastfeed which made her feel even worse.

Wolfiefan Sun 15-Jan-17 21:55:07

I think the word "plan" is misleading. Think of it as your hopes and wishes. Don't be afraid of putting maybe or I think id like. If it's your first you have no idea of what it will be like. I put I may like a water birth. I wouldn't mind trying TENS. I wanted to try and avoid an epidural and stay mobile. But i could have ended up with a c section!

MrsNuckyThompson Sun 15-Jan-17 21:55:08

I wouldn't assume she'll have time to help you. I discussed this at ante natal classes and cribbed stuff off the internet. Maybe go along with a draft and ask if she has time to go over it with you?

TheTantrumCometh Sun 15-Jan-17 21:59:24

Just to add to the replies, you don't need to clear anything with the midwife wrt painkillers etc. It's not a case of if it hasn't been discussed with you on the birth plan then it's not an option.

Birth plans are there purely for HCP's to have a reference point of your wishes. I actually didn't write a birth plan with either of my Dc's. With DC1 I didn't know what to expect. I didn't know how the pain would affect me and what would be the best course. I did research on the pros and cons of each type of pain relief and had decided that I'd rather not have pethedin (sp?) but I would have taken it if it was best. I wanted an active labour if possible but I thought I'd either say so at the time or just do it, or it wouldn't be an option. It wasn't an option as I was induced and it was stressing me out trying to keep the monitors on and stay active.

The only thing that was a must for me was that DH tell me whether we'd had a boy or girl and there was no point writing that down. I just made sure that if there was a shift change I let the new midwife/HCP know that, which I would have done if it was written down anyway.

With DC2 I had a CS so there wasn't a birth plan to do. Though again, I made sure DH was the one to tell me if we had a boy or girl. DC3 will also be CS and I won't be bothering again either.

So I found not having a birth plan absolutely fine. As PP said, it's good to keep an open mind because no one knows how their labour will progress. You could be adamant that you want an epidural but find the pain manageable etc. As another PP said however, it could be useful to go over with your midwife just in case you have any expectations that aren't realistic smile

drinkyourmilk Sun 15-Jan-17 22:01:42

I'm 29 weeks and have already brought it up with my midwife. We've agreed on a couple of points and the rest I've suggested we just wing. If I make a plan as such I'll be disappointed if it doesn't work out.

mlr1uk Sun 15-Jan-17 22:06:19

Ha ha my birth plan is pretty much going to be "get this baby out of me"!!

My midwife has been pretty useless so just wondered if she'd not mentioned due to that but from the above anticipate it maybe raised at next appointment, if she doesn't, I'll raise with her

Thanks all x

Brown76 Sun 15-Jan-17 22:10:06

The main thing to think about is where you want to give birth. In my experience no-one really asked me what I wanted (birth centre) and I had to bring it up with the consultant and get it written into my notes that yes, that was going to be supported by the hospital. I had a great midwife for ante natal classes and she suggested writing a few key points on a sheet of A4 and sticking it on the front of my hand held notes so it could be skim read quickly by midwife on the day. This worked out well, and removed all my flowery language and cut it down to a few bullet points: 1st baby, due xx date, birth centre a must, hypnobirthing, offer gas and air but not epidural unless requested, birthing partners are X and Y. That sort of thing. As that's all anyone has time to read on the day. HTH

TheNewMrsGerardButler Sun 15-Jan-17 22:12:47

My midwife told me to book a double appointment for my 36 week appt next week to discuss the birth plan. I have, however, already started compiling one. I did some research online, looked at templates and have included what I think I would like (keeping mobile/active, use of water pool if possible, delayed cord clamping, DP telling me if it's a boy or girl, skin to skin etc). However, I've made it clear in a paragraph at the top that I'm aware these are simply my birth preferences in the beSt case scenario and I'm aware that circumstances can change, and getting the baby out safely is THE main priority so do what needs to be done.

Chelazla Sun 15-Jan-17 22:12:50

My plan was "we'll take it as it comes", my midwife said this was the best plan!wink I know people with mad plans screaming for the epidural in minutes! Just see how it's going is my advice (fwiw). All that matters is the end result! Good luck ladies!

Mungobungo Sun 15-Jan-17 22:15:11

It's really important to think not of a birth plan, but your birth PREFERENCES. It's really tricky to write a plan when birth is unpredictable and you can't know how you'll cope when it happens.

Around 36 weeks is a good time to get it all together. It do your research beforehand about what's available to you locally regarding place of birth, pain relief etc. Most pregnancy notes have a section where there are prompts for you to consider and can make notes. Use these as a guide, then get on the internet and find out more about each key point. Anything you're not sure of, you can then speak to your midwife when you see her at 36 weeks.

sj257 Sun 15-Jan-17 22:34:17

Nobody has mentioned it to me. I'm due on Wednesday, third child, will just discuss it when I go in I guess!

Mamatallica Sun 15-Jan-17 23:06:38

I read about making a birth plan and kept expecting my midwife to mention it, eventually I brought it up and she said I could write some stuff down if I wanted. Apart from asking where I wanted the birth, she couldn't have cared less. I hope yours is more supportive.

Imaginationfailedtoload Sun 15-Jan-17 23:10:06

Birth plans are discussed at around 36 weeks. By then you know baby is coming in the right direction etc etc. Jot your ideas down and have a chat with your midwife

3boys3dogshelp Sun 15-Jan-17 23:16:54

3 pregnancies, never mentioned by a midwife in any of my appointments! I picked up most of my preferences from reading up and from my antenatal classes. The top tip from classes was not to write down that you didn't Want an epidural/pethidine etc as then the midwife would try really hard not to give you one in order to stick to your plan!!
My (verbal) plan was 'let's see what happens, I'm open to everything needed' which was lucky as I ended up with three inductions.

Mamatallica Sun 15-Jan-17 23:33:36

Yes, to be fair, none of my preferences worked out either. It was pretty much the opposite of what I wanted. I got my baby though so it's all worth it smile

Acorncat Mon 16-Jan-17 22:33:18

I had a birth plan sheet in my notes. I filled in some brief points but I don't think they actually looked at it. I just made sure I knew that I wanted delayed cord clamping, the injection for placenta removal or not and the Vitamin K injection for baby. They just asked at the time what I wanted, a detailed, thought out plan would have been pointless I think

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