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How supportive are midwives...?

(43 Posts)
LittlePear91 Fri 30-Dec-16 19:46:51

... when it comes to hypnobirthing techniques? By techniques I'm more specifically referring to the idea of hypnobirthing, as well as the idea of not forcibly pushing and allowing (as far as is medically reasonable) to allow your body to do what it was built for?

My community midwife has so far been very matronly (which is fine, I don't want her counsel particularly) but when I've mentioned that I'd like hypnobirthing techniques to be a part of my birth plan, she's been a bit standoffish and sort of brushes it aside. Basically suggesting that it's a load of rubbish and that I'll be doing as I'm told once I'm in labour.

So I'm choosing to ignore her grin and read up and practice the techniques anyways. My question is, for those of you who've used hypnobirthing techniques whilst in labour, how supportive have your midwives actually been of it?

I'm not nervous about labour itself, more that my ideal techniques are going to be laughed out of the labour ward!!

BreatheDeep Fri 30-Dec-16 19:57:25

I haven't used hypnobirthing techniques but with my first I had a water birth with just gas and air and breathing techniques to manage the pain. The midwives were really really supportive and discouraged me from wavering from my birth plan.

I think it depends on the midwife and on the type of delivery centre you are in though. Some can be more for a medicated birth as that's what they are used to.

PossumInAPearTree Fri 30-Dec-16 19:58:47

I'm a midwife and I love hypnobirthing. Only seen a few women do it but with good results. I'm a big fan.

Even if women aren't hypnobirthing I rarely do the directed pushing. Just tell women to go with it, listen to their body, do what they feel they need to do, etc. I think midwives need to trust that generally women's bodies know what to do.

DomesticAnarchist Fri 30-Dec-16 20:00:22

I used hypnobirthing techniques with DC1 and the midwife was fine with it (they're all a bit woo round here, mind).

I just quietly went about it my own way.

However, I'll be amazed if you can not push! It's an overwhelming urge!

(DC1 took what felt like hours of pushing. If I hadn't have tried he'd never have come and would likely have ended up distressed. DC2 took about 2 pushes!)

DomesticAnarchist Fri 30-Dec-16 20:02:29

Hypnobirthing was ace too, btw. I never got round to doing the CDs with DC2, was quite blasé about it, and read Juju Sundin's ludicrous book instead and was far more uncomfortable.

BendingSpoons Fri 30-Dec-16 20:02:32

The London trust where I gave birth were supportive of hypnobirthing and similar approaches. My midwife had been on a course about visualisation. A friend attended a hypnobirthing course at her NHS hospital. We were probably lucky though with their view. Where are you giving birth? If it's at a birth centre that may help.

BaublesandBells Fri 30-Dec-16 20:13:20

My midwife was amazing. As soon as she found out I was hypnobirthing (shift swap during) she took a step back and allowed me to do what I needed to do. They held a ward round during pushing and she told the consultant not to talk or touch me. Sure the consultant ignored her and I screamed at her! Midwife got annoyed with how they were, threatening intervention etc. So she chased them all out of the room, held me hand, told me to focus and she knew I could do it. She was amazing. I delivered a 10lb3 baby, no forceps etc which shows how premature they were jumping the gun. I am not saying hypnobirthing stopped any intervention but for me it was amazing and kept me calm and focused during the whole thing. I never really believed in the classes etc the whole time I was doing them but it all took over when labour started! I think just make sure you have it in your birth plan. Next time I will do the same and make sure they know I don't want any cheering me on etc.

MyBreadIsEggy Fri 30-Dec-16 20:20:43

I gave birth to my second child at home 10 weeks ago, and the midwife who attended was totally on board with what I wanted.
To be honest, she sat on my sofa nursing a cup of coffee for majority of my labour, while I bounced and breathed my way through contractions on my yoga ball! She actually said "You've done this before, you do it your way honey!" when I showed her my birth plan grin
The only time she really intervened with anything was about 8 hours in, I was knackered and asked her to have a look what was going on "down there". After a quick examination and seeing that I was fully dilated but waters still bulging, she broken them for me and my DS was born a few minutes later, caught by my DH smile

Princessdelrey Fri 30-Dec-16 21:02:50

My community midwife was pushing it on me!! I live in Cornwall so they love all that stuff down here.

soundsystem Fri 30-Dec-16 21:13:19

When I had DD the midwives were very supportive. I had a home birth, though, and I guess home birth midwives are more aware of it (as there are fewer other pain relief options available). Did have a bit of an issue with the midwives not believing just how in labour I was as I was very calm/able to have a conversation!

This time round the midwife asked I I was doing hypnobirthing (different team as the set up in my area has changed since my last pregnancy).

LittlePear91 Fri 30-Dec-16 21:13:55

I'm in the north east so not sure how over the top they are about it here.

Thank you all so much for your replies- I'll continue pressing for it to be part of my birth plan! Of course, having never had a baby before, who knows how it'll actually go when the time comes but no harm in having an ideal scenario planned out.

It's a birthing centre that I'm planning on giving birth in, but it's attached to a major hospital with a medic-led labour ward and children's hospital too so whatever happens, I'm in safe hands!

Your replies have boosted my confidence in hypnobirthing and sticking to my guns- thank you all! Love hearing these positive experiences smile

MyBreadIsEggy Sat 31-Dec-16 07:31:08

LittlePear if it's a midwife led birthing centre I would think they would be pretty on board for hypnobirthing smile
In the birthing centre you have the same options for pain relief as you would at home, so they will probably encourage hypnobirthing birthing techniques even if they don't call it that!

PotteringAlong Sat 31-Dec-16 07:36:54

littlepear I assume from what you've said you're going to the RVI and I can't comment on them, but I've had my 2 at the QE in Gateshead (and am 36 weeks with number 3) and they were great - low lights, no talking, all very calm and lovely.

DoubleCarrick Sat 31-Dec-16 07:40:51

I haven't given birth yet but have been doing hypnobirthing. I'm also planning on doing the whole no directed pushing thing.

I've been told that if ny midwife is unsupportive then I can ask for a different one. I'm also planning a home birth because I feel like I will have more control that way. A midwife unit will be just as understanding though, I imagine.

I have been advised to make a sign for the door if I am in hospital to make people come into the room quietly.

LittlePear91 Sat 31-Dec-16 11:30:16

Pottering Ah that's lovely! Yes it's the RVI- hopefully they'll be as supportive there as they've been for you at QE!

I just feel like I want it to be as calm a process and environment as possible. I'm not generally a very laid back person so feel like this is my chance to do things a bit differently to how I might normally approach something. And it can't hurt to be calm rather than all het-up about it!

MyBreadIsEggy Sat 31-Dec-16 12:12:13

LittlePear sounds like you're in the right mindset smile
Freaking out and panicking releases cortisol (the stress hormone) which hinders your body's ability to produce oxytocin (the "love" hormone that makes all the mechanics of childbirth work!).
Stay positive and calm and keep that oxytocin flowing grin You've got this 👌🏻

LittlePear91 Sat 31-Dec-16 12:38:57

mybread thank you! I'll have to save this thread and come back to see your pep talk before the big day grin

PotteringAlong Sat 31-Dec-16 12:49:13

I know lots of people with very positive experiences of the RVI - you'll be grand grin

museumum Sat 31-Dec-16 12:52:15

I did not learn hypnobirthing but gave birth in a mlu attached to a hospital in a pool and was pretty much left alone (my choice). Dh and the mw checked in me every so often with support but I felt like I was fine on my own and didn't want to engage with anyone else.

LittlePear91 Sat 31-Dec-16 17:03:58

Pottering Ah, that's good! I haven't been for a visit to the birthing centre yet so my only introduction to the whole process has been my community midwife, who as I've mentioned before is a bit standoffish- so I wasn't sure!

Booked a couple of their antenatal classes for the new year. 11 weeks to go- hopefully it'll fly by!

JellyWitch Sat 31-Dec-16 17:07:11

It depends on your midwife. I had one for my first baby who I wouldn't have allowed in the house (homebirth) if she had been on call! My second birth I had a matronly and very experience mw who was absolutely brilliant and just let me to it - no internal examination either - she just watched and assessed me visually.

WeiAnMeokEo Sat 31-Dec-16 18:14:50

I had a hypnobirth at home with mother directed pushing and my midwife was awesome - just hung out and let me get on with it, no internal exams, no pressure on me at all. Just caught my baby when he shot out (I was squatting so she had to be quick!) and passed him straight over for skin to skin.

I would say, if this is what you want then do not be afraid to be as bolshy as you need. I was really lucky to have the experience I did - there are midwives like mine but I also encountered some who were very anti anything other than a hospital birth done their way or the highway and evenot one of the community midwives who came round to see me postnatally I would have hated to have at the birth as she was frankly mean! So basically, don't think of it in terms of what you might be 'allowed' to do, think of it in terms of this being YOUR birth and they can just blooming well get on board. Go through likely scenarios with your birth partner (they want to do x y z intervention ) and make sure he/she knows what questions to ask and how to refuse firmly on your behalf, and generally how to advocate for you. I did Hypnobabies and they had a great role play section for this - might be worth looking good it up?

Good luck and enjoy it - it was honestly the most amazing , powerful experience of my life!

OnTheUp13 Sat 31-Dec-16 18:18:41

Depends who you get. I hypnobirthed through DD for 36.5 hours. First midwife was fab and on board, second one was a twat and didn't get it and he final one was also on board and just stood by whilst I delivered!

OnTheUp13 Sat 31-Dec-16 18:20:49

When it came to pushing she told me to pant once and she put my hand on DDs head as she crowned. Apart from that she stood by and told me to push when I needed to.

OnTheUp13 Sat 31-Dec-16 18:21:24

As in "Push when you need to" not "push now"

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