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Got questions about giving birth? Know what to expect and when to expect it, with the Mumsnet Pregnancy Calendar.

Any have any nice stories of giving birth??

(124 Posts)
MidnightBreeze Mon 14-Nov-16 19:55:44

As the title says really, all I seem to read is traumatic births & il be honest it's absolutely freaking me out!!

I just want some good experiences!

FourToTheFloor Mon 14-Nov-16 20:00:50

Well I had a traumatic birth with dd1 and an amazing experience with dd2. I did hypno birthing with dd2 but I had a fantastic midwife with dd2 which I think makes all the difference.

And a very quick labour. 4 hours from water's breaking (no contractions though) until I was holding dd2.

CatsCantFlyFast Mon 14-Nov-16 20:01:26

Dd1 - waters broke at midnight (in a flood half way to the bathroom, and they kept coming for an hour or so!!) Contractions started at 2am - lasted 45 seconds and about every minute right from the off. Weren't painful, just uncomfortable and tiring, stayed at home until 6am. Into the birth centre and into the pool with lovely oils burning and so on. Calm, dark, lovely, and she arrived at 9am in the pool. Would do it again in a heartbeat - it was lovely

unimagmative13 Mon 14-Nov-16 20:02:17

It depends on who you are! Mine would be traumatic for some and is certainly a story to tell, but it's a distant memory. I know someone who had a similar birth and is completely traumatised and can't move on from it.

From personal experience people I know who are traumatised after birth because it wasn't what they expected or how they planned it. I also know a few people looking to pin blame on others.

Just be open that anything can happen, it's one thing you have little control over x

OohhThatsMe Mon 14-Nov-16 20:02:50

Me! Second child, went into labour at home and had him a couple of hours after getting to hospital. Just gas and air - great delivery (my friend is a midwife and delivered him.) A few stitches which I didn't notice really as she gave me lots of local anaesthetic and I held my son while she did it. Quick shower, stayed the night (years back, before everyone got thrown out early) and then home.

My daughter was my first child and although she was a forceps delivery, I only had gas and air. Less than a minute was tough and the rest was fine. Manageable. Everything was explained in full - that was very important to me.

Best of luck!

Luckystar1 Mon 14-Nov-16 20:04:18

I had 2 easy, straightforward water births. No tearing,no stitches, no pain relief. I won't have a 3rd as I'm too afraid of a difficult labour/birth!

JukkaSarasti Mon 14-Nov-16 20:05:25

I know how you feel. As I became more visibly pregnant people just seemed to want to share horror stories!

I had 3 very ordinary births, DD was a wee bit tricky as she had the cord round her neck but doctors/midwives were all over it very quickly and she was fine. No tearing, no serious complications. No pooing (that I'm aware of - of course there could have been poo everywhere but nothing that I saw grin).

I'm very lucky. I was reasonably clear about what I wanted/didn't want. My TENS machine was wonderful and just kept me distracted/busy so I wasn't climbing the walls. They offered me a water birth but when I found out I had to take the TENS off I just scowled and muttered at them and gripped my zapper! All in all very straightforward and some good memories believe it or not.

MinnowAndTheBear Mon 14-Nov-16 20:06:23

Immediately following DS2's very straight forward birth, I was hit with the biggest rush of hormones you could imagine. I remember thinking to myself, "I feel amazing! I feel like Beyoncé!" I could have taken on the world and won. It was genuinely one of the best things I've ever experienced.

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface Mon 14-Nov-16 20:08:03

I got the world's most awesome son at the end of mine.

Don't remember much else about it.

Midwife was lovely.

EsmesBees Mon 14-Nov-16 20:08:25

My first was so easy that I didn't even realise I was in labour! DH finally convinced me to go to the hospital and they said I was 8cm. I couldn't believe it. Got through the rest with just gas and air, no tearing, and then over night in a private room. I found it a really positive experience, I felt like superwoman.

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface Mon 14-Nov-16 20:08:50

"I feel like Beyonce!"


IEatCannibals Mon 14-Nov-16 20:11:54

I'm a midwife and I have seen hundreds of lovely, calm, straight forward births. People like to big up the horror stories I think at times. Stay positive.

LaPharisienne Mon 14-Nov-16 20:15:37

I was induced and it was lovely! Epidural early on, lovely time gossiping with the midwives, did a spot of pushing, baby arrived v.quickly with the help of forceps - reckon I felt pain for around a minute and then I had a wonderful beautiful baby.

Good luck!

ghostspirit Mon 14-Nov-16 20:16:16

I had 3 of my kids in hospital. They were not overly bad. Nothing bad actually happend but the problem was the way I was treated in general was not very nice and they don't talk in a nice way.

I then had 3 home births which were fantastic. The midwifes seemed much kinder. And more friendly. It was relaxed and just perfect I can't explain why it just was grin

I also had a home birth on my own as it all happend to fast
But that was pretty ace to.

okalidokali Mon 14-Nov-16 20:16:45

Mine was quick too! Contractions started 5am like v strong period pains for most of the day. It was definitely manageable - I even went to supermarket! Followed by visitors!

DH came home from work and we got to hospital at about 5pm. Waters hadn't gone but contractions were regular and close together so off we went. Baby was born by 615pm with ventouse. Gas and air was all I had time for and it was enough.

For me I felt calm because whilst it did hurt, it hurt in exactly the way I would have expected it to hurt - there were no surprises! I actually forgot about my hypnobirthing but didn't need it.

Hope it goes well OP.

vvviola Mon 14-Nov-16 20:17:06

My first was probably pretty ordinary other than being a bit fast (relatively speaking) and a bit early (36 weeks).

My second was lovely. Routine appointment discovered I was 6cm. Was brought to delivery suite, did some knitting, called DH to tell him to go home from work and have some dinner before coming in. I barely had a contraction before they broke my waters when I was 9cm, and DD2 arrive in 45 minutes grin. Other than yelling at poor DH when he couldn't get the facecloth cold enough, and having a little wobble that I'd "forgotten what to do" about 10 minutes before she was born (about 10 minutes before DD1 was born I told everyone I'd changed my mind and I was going home and would have the baby another day grin, so obviously something happens to my brain around then!), everything was really calm and quite nice. Incidentally, I didn't go hypno birthing or anything like that (not my thing) and I was giving birth in a very medicalised environment (Belgian hospital, consultant-led care), so I wouldn't necessarily say that the midwife-led/birth pool/hypnobirthing way is the only way to get a nice relaxed birth (no criticism of it at all, just saying that if for whatever reason you can't have it, it doesn't mean the birth will be stressful etc)

ElectricMelon Mon 14-Nov-16 20:17:27

I was in labour 2 hours start to finish. Straight forward with no drugs, not even gas and air.

Despite this I will not be doing it again any time soon, if at all!

Just tell yourself the baby has to come out one way or another so there is no point in panicking or worrying too much.

vvviola Mon 14-Nov-16 20:20:45

The other thing to remember is - if you haven't given birth, then any birth story has the potential to sound scary.

I remember sitting around with a group of friends (some parents, some not) and we ended up on birth/labour stories. I realised that the non-parents were looking progressively more horrified as the stories went on... all of which we would have considered to be positive birth stories. It was just so out of their experience that the bits of it that we were able to look back fondly on and laugh (me deciding to go home, my friend's water going in her car, me giving poor DH a hard time), sounded absolutely awful to them.

grounddown Mon 14-Nov-16 20:21:00

Me too!!
2 easy births, one on a bed and one in the pool - the pool was best as it was dark with twinkly lights. DS floated up and I caught him, lovely memory. I didn't need pain relief either time and didn't do any damage.

One tip, don't tense up. Just relax and go with it. Your body knows what to do.
Congrats on your pregnancy flowers

Blackfellpony Mon 14-Nov-16 20:21:09

Mine was okay. Started at 3am, rushed to hospital and was 6cms, had a laugh with lovely midwives, had a sleep, baby born at 7am.

I'm not going to lie it hurt but it wasn't as bad as expected!

MrsGB2015 Mon 14-Nov-16 20:26:29

I was really lucky when I had my son. I went in around 4am when I was 3cm, used a TENS machine until I was 6cm at 9am. Then used gas and air until I went birthing pool at 12 (at 10cm... No pools were available before I then). Had DS at 2.30. The whole hypnobirthing stuff wasn't massively for me (I spent the Whole hypno session thinking about my lunch rather than listen to the CD at NCT) but I did put together a playlist of relaxing songs that I listened too. And I tried to breath and count through the contractions. Me and DH found it a very bonding experience! In a weird way I'm kinda looking forward to giving birth again.

I'd rather give birth 10 times then have a reflux newborn that never sleeps!!

minipie Mon 14-Nov-16 20:32:28

DD1 was traumatic but because she was prem rather than due to pain - it wasn't exactly pleasant but it certainly wasn't agony. Small episiotomy, healed easily.

DD2 was textbook - start to finish in under 3 hours, mainly just uncomfortable and she was born just as it was starting to actually properly hurt. No pain relief (no time!). Slight tear, healed easily.

Agree that the key is not to tense up, but try to relax as much as possible, especially your jaw and shoulders. I also found low lighting, being warm (socks!), standing up and counting through contractions really helpful. DD1 would have been born much quicker and more easily if I'd been allowed to stand up (still cross about that).

3luckystars Mon 14-Nov-16 20:37:23

My last 2 births were great!

The best bit was when they were over, I was elated that were finished and everything turned out ok!

My friend gave birth to her second child just before I did, we both had very long first labours with loads of interventions etc.
Anyway, she hadn't time for an epidural and totally freaked out. She rang me and advised me to not freak out and make the same mistake she did. She told me that she ruined the birth because she was in such a panic about not having time for the drugs, she wished that she had calmed down and went with it, that she was going to survive and should have just taken a deep breath and calmed the fuck down.

Well I took her advise, it was ringing in my ears as I went into labour the second time. Calm down, go with it,you will survive. It was v painful, but I gave birth in just over 30 minutes, no stitches and felt great after it. (this was nothing to do with staying calm, the baby comes out whatever way it wants, but I didn't wreck it by panicking if you get me)

My last labour was the same, I was induced and that bit went on for ages so I was tired, but the actual full on labour bit was the same, her advice stood to me again then. Whatever happens, and its as unpredictable as the weather, whatever happens, just go with it, it might not be "lovely" but if you try to stay calm, you will make the best of it.
Good luck.

Luckystar1 Mon 14-Nov-16 20:44:03

I'd completely second remaining calm. I'm not a calm person but somehow remain extremely calm in labour, but it's very easy to lose focus and panic which does no favours (adrenaline slows everything down)

reallyanotherone Mon 14-Nov-16 20:45:00

It depends on your pov and expectations.

My friend had an absolute textbook, 1cm/hour, 10 hour labour from start to finish.

She is utterly traumatised. Whether she didn't do her research and didn't know what to expect, or what she thought would happen, i don't know. Apparently about 5 hours in she thought she would need an EMCS for "failure to progress". So much so she doesn't know if she will have a 2nd, if she does she is adamant she will have an elcs as she "just isn't built for birth".

She seems to think I had an "easy" birth. She knows I had an emcs without going into established labour-again, she assumed it was for failure to progress, and that not having to labour means it can't have been traumatic like hers.

I haven't told her about the sudden severe, horrendous pain that was placental detachment and the near loss of our baby.

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