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seriously bricking it...

(4 Posts)
catscratchingpost Mon 08-Feb-16 09:44:01

...about the birth. am a regular but have NC for this as I think it might out me if anyone I know is reading! Am 35+6 so baby is possibly imminent (or possibly still 6 weeks away, who knows). Have been relatively calm re: childbirth up til now but am now fully realising I have to do it and am shitting myself.

I have a mental health condition which means I get very upset if I am spoken to harshly or if I am not listened to (I know we all do, but I get worse IYSWIM). My main worry does not necessarily centre around the pain, scary as that is, but more around the fact that I have heard so many stories about women not being listened to and choices not being respected. I also don't like being interfered with, so I already know I do not want a sweep and I definitely don't want to be induced unless there is a genuine medical reason for it (ie, not just because I am overdue).

I will have two excellent birth partners with me - my DP and my mum - and I know they'll be able to speak up on my behalf, but I'm still frightened. Also terrified of something going badly wrong and dying, which I know is daft, but still...

Also stressing because we're in the process of buying our own place while currently living in rented. If all goes well with exchange etc we'll have people coming round for viewings on our current place literally at the exact time I'm due. I really don't want people coming round when I'm not here due to our two cats who may run out and also don't want people coming round when I have a tiny tiny baby (like, days old). Can't do much about this but is another stress.

Any advice/similar worries?

Bumpsadaisie Mon 08-Feb-16 10:32:54

Bless you. Its normal to be worried about something unknown like having a baby, in particular if other things are up in the air (like where you are living).

You can cancel viewings or put them off for a couple of weeks. Your estate agent can explain that you have just had a baby, people will understand.

The birth itself will just happen - your body knows what to do - you don't have to do it, you just have to let it unfold. The medical staff will be there to keep an eye and help things along if needed. It will probably be nothing like you imagine! (Don't think you can really imagine childbirth tbh.)

We spend all our lives as women, from the time when we are little girls and it dawns on us that we are going to have to go through childbirth, thinking about it and how painful it will be. Now its happening for you. Of course you're frightened. But honestly it's really not that bad. Most women have more than one child.

And if it is painful or you're too tired after a long labour, lots of things can be done to help you.

angemorange Mon 08-Feb-16 10:44:16

Having a written birth plan of how you would like things to be is a good idea, but be prepared that things can change during the course of the birth.

I'm a total scaredy cat and managed a sweep and long labour ending in a C-section and I look back and think I had a wonderful experience!

DoodleCat Mon 08-Feb-16 10:53:04

It's natural to be scared, but try not to let it overwhelm you (easier said than done I know). Remember that you hear the horror stories more than the positive ones. The staff will listen to you and you'll have your family there to help you.

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