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How long did you have to wait for a debrief (if you asked for one)?

(8 Posts)
PurpleTreeFrog Sat 09-Jan-16 22:27:12

It's been about a year since I asked, my son is now 19 months old and I asked when he was already about 6 or so months old. I had a really horrible birth, so want to learn more about the what's and why's before we consider having another baby.

But I haven't heard a thing... I called a few months back and they said there's a waiting list... But this seems excessively? Would like to know how long others have had to wait.

KatyN Sat 09-Jan-16 22:33:38

I didn't ask for a debrief but I spent an afternoon on the Internet. It really helped me and then I was able to explain to family what had happened. It also meant I didn't have to go back to the hospital to talk it through as I really never wanted to set foot inside it again.
However, I was referred to the midwife matron while pregnant to have a pre -debrief. We talked about my first labour and what I would like in place to make my second more reassuring and that appointment came through within a week.

A year seems excessive. Hope you get some answers kx

ayria Sat 09-Jan-16 22:36:38

Don't think I'll help... but I know when I had mine she said she gets booked up quick. Initially she wanted to book me in for September last year, but I told her that was too long, not demanding for an earlier date in any way, just winced at the time. Then she said she'll book me in for July. And from then it was 6 weeks until she came round.

I know debrief lists do get booked quick, and spaces snatched up pretty fast but there have been women that have waited a year or more, it's a shame. I think I was lucky in getting one pretty quick, I live in a rural area. Don't know if that has anything to do with it.

Would you be able to ask them for a rough time if they didn't say when you rang? You're on a waiting list so surely they'll know how many people are in front of you or something.

ayria Sat 09-Jan-16 22:42:38

I tried to find things out before a debrief, but nothing on the internet could have told me that my son's heart rate dropped which was why everything went downhill. I tried to gage from their actions and expressions what happened according to things I read and how things are managed, but it didn't help.

I think if you know what happened in the first place, there are some things you can search on the internet, but not everything.

I stressed myself out with it, thinking 'Did that happen to me then?' or 'Is that why then?' But... I didn't have a yes or no answer in front of me so it did nothing for my mental health.

Mrswinkler Sat 09-Jan-16 22:56:13

Just for anyone else reading this thread - I had what I thought was a pretty crap birth experience in hospital. From googling I found out I had a limited time to request a copy of my hospital notes for free. It costs if you leave it too long.

I got a copy of the notes intending to go over them with a private midwife if I ever got pregnant again. I decided to stop at one so never needed them but glad I had the knowledge to request them.

ayria Sun 10-Jan-16 21:55:10

By the way my son is nearly 4 years old, so I think I waited long enough, 3 and a half years nearly, ha! Only knew about birth debriefs in May last year, and enquired about one at the end of May I think. sad

I wonder if it depends on whether you go to the hospital or have someone come to your house, maybe?

3littlebadgers Sun 10-Jan-16 21:58:08

Mine was 2 months, but it was following a stillbirth and they had the results of the placenta and swabs etc.

Keeptrudging Sun 10-Jan-16 22:03:39

I had a debrief in the hospital before I got out, I was really impressed with them doing it and it helped a lot. Bad birth, DD nearly didn't make it multiple times intensive care etc. Can't believe you are having to wait so long, it can be so important for

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