After nearly 2 years since giving birth, and im still uncomfortable having sex. Afterwards my perineum is very sore and sometimes theres a bit of blood when i wipe. Is there anything that can be done? Im convinced i was stitched too tight
I have a friend who experienced this and had to have some reconstructive surgery where they cut her removed scar tissue and sewed up again a bit 'looser' so it sounds like it's worth you asking the doctor. It seems like a long time afterwards and it's not going to be getting better now
I think I was stitched too tight, I also had some other problems with the scar tissue bunching up. I was going to have an operation, but it resolved itself once I finished bf ds1 when he was 7 months (apparently you don't heal so well when breastfeeding), but I think if it's been 2 years it not going to get any better on it's own and you should see your GP.
I think this happened to me. I've always been quite... unstretchy down there, but sex was virtually impossible after I had a third degree tear repaired.
You have several options: ask for a referral to a gynae. You can have an op which involves being cut and restitched. Yeah, I know
Is the pain mainly in the perineum or internally as well? For me it was the latter, and another option is to try dialators (basically like medical dildos, starting small then getting bigger) which you use to gradually stretch things out again.
Oh, and I take it you use lots of lube? That helps.
I was in agony after the birth of ds1, it just didn't seem to get better. We went to the gynocologist (male, abroad) who basically asked my husband if it was bothering him, when my husband nervously answered no, just that he was conscious of it effecting me, the gynocologist said no problem and refused to treat me. Fast forward to the birth of ds2 I needed a second episiotomy and luckily for me it cured me of the first lot of stitches. As far as I know you can have minor surgery to undo a bad scar. I hope it gets resolved for you.
OMG badgers. I can't believe the doctor asked your husband if it was bothering HIM?! That's outrageous. I had a friend, in this country, being stitched up after labour by a male doctor. The doctor asked my friends husband 'does that look how you want it to look, would you like it a bit tighter?' !!!! I can't believe this happens these days.
I know, at the time I sobbed, but post ds2 life has been lovely again. Please ask for a referral, I have been where you are and it was mentally as well as physically torturous. No matter how much I loved my husband I was terrified of him coming anywhere near me.
I think if you had a consultation they would answer that question there. Childbirth cured my issue, it might be the same for you, then again it might be something that can easily be rectified before then.
I've been wondering this to OP. DS is four months and sex hurts. Only really done it once. It hurts at the entrance and feels like a graze, I bled a little after and it also hurt to wee. I read on the nhs website it can take up to six months to fully heal. Hadn't heard that it takes longer when bfing though. Why is that, do you know tutu? Really would like to avoid having a 'repair'. I'm hoping I'm just getting ahead of myself and it will get better over time?!
It something to do with the hormones you produce when breastfeeding impinging on the body's ability to heal properly or as quickly. All I know is I was set to have and operation to cut out the original scar tissue and then re-stitch the wound, but within a couple of months of stopping breastfeeding ds1 it all settled down on it's own. My ds2 was a smaller baby and the scar was fine during the birth and I didn't require another episiotomy.
I feel for all of you suffering with this. My ds is also 4 months old honeybear and I still feel sore after 2nd degree tear. Sitting down I get sore, can't wear jeans as it rubs and haven't even tried sex as it seems ridiculous to even try. I also was of the opinion it will get better with time. I've been back to the gp twice and have been given a steroid cream to try to numb things apparently (?!) but was told it would not be good enough for me to have sex! I am ebf and wonder if it's actually vaginal dryness causing me to feel sore due to low oestrogen, I'm not having any discharge either. I've asked for a referral to gyne now so will see what happens.
Oh wow sazz that sounds difficult. I'm definitely not having as much of a hard time. Haven't been to the GP. My episiotomy was equivalent to a second degree tear though. I think I will leave it a bit longer and see how I go. DH will have to just go without! I would like another baby at some point so I guess it will become important in a year or so. By which point I won't be breastfeeding and I'll definitely know if I need to see a doctor!