Of course, labour is tough, but retrospectively, there are actually still a couple of things I am laughing about today (my DS is 10 1/2 months old).
My DS was a bit of a surprise arrival at 36+1 weeks. Thinking that I would go into hospital to be assessed, maximally to stay a night to be started on antibiotics, I unpacked my hospital bag at home to pack a smaller overnight bag (my husband is still laughing about this today) and paid for three hours parking. A few hours and some tiny contractions later it dawned on me that I'd be here to stay for the night, so I shuffled downstairs to the hospital reception - in the spirit of active labour - to upgrade my parking ticket. And who is working at the parking office? The student whose PhD I had failed (and whom I really really dislike!) only about three weeks earlier ...
Anyway, I shuffle back upstairs, contractions getting stronger and shorter together by the minute (start of contractions to 9 cm - 2 hours). I arrive back on the ward, the biggest contraction so far almost floors me. I lean on the reception desk and breathe heavily. Lady behind the desk: "What's wrong with you?" What's wrong with me? The best answer to this one would probably have been "Where do you work?" but my funny bones were failing me at this point.
Half an hour later, my husband arrives back, having raced back 60 miles from a stag do which was meant to be his last night of freedom (he will probably never quite forgive our son). My contractions are now very painful, I scream for pain relief. But they don't want to examine me due me being 36 weeks, risk of infection and because they don't believe I am that far yet. One of the pictures that I've got in my mind from that evening is my husband almost physically dragging a midwife to my bed (he says if it'd been a guy, he wouldn't have guaranteed non-violence). Lo and behold, 9cms.
Finally on labour ward, 2 hours of contractions, getting high on gas & air and not pushing so well (because of getting high on gas & air). Gas & Air is taken away from me (my husband had the honour to take the nozzle out of my reach... I could have punched him at this point!). Unexpectedly (by me), midwife says "Just one more contraction and head is out." Well, unfortunately, wrong assessment, because it was twooooo pushes! Apparently, I was not at my politest at this point. Then, at the next contraction, trainee midwife (a mum of three herself, so she should know better) says "This is going to sting a bit" in anticipation of head actually coming through. My husband says a I looked at her as if I was going to have her for dinner...
Altogether I look back on the whole evening with real fondness and I really laugh at all these episodes now!
Did anything funny happen during your labour (At least funny in retrospect)? Make me laugh!
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Childbirth
Did anything funny happen do you during labour?
dodi1978 · 16/06/2014 20:05
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