2nd-time ELCS - what are your experiences?

[MolotovCocktail]

Hello, I'm not currently pregnant but have a question to ask about 2nd-time ELCS.

We have 2 DDs: DD1 is 4.2yo (VB) and DD2 has just turned 1yo. She was born by ELCS last April.

My DH has recently started to say that he would quite like to have another baby. I'm not sure yet if I'm ready for another but am open to the idea of DC3.

Anyway, any more babies for us will probably be born by ELCS as I'd reject VBAC due to the reasons why I requested my ELCS last year, and the fact that I've already had one ELCS.

Part of the reason why I'm probably not ready just yet is the recovery from a section: I had no complications last time, but needed a lot of help for the first few weeks. I had a 3yo an a newborn then: I'd have a school-age child, a toddler/young child and a newborn -
what's it like recovering and needing to look after a young family?

Now, this is a vain question, but here goes - My body
has recovered very well: there is still some over-sensitive skin around my scar but you can barely see the scar itself. I don't have the dreaded CS
'overhang'. What impact does a 3rd pregnancy/2nd CS have on your body? (I'm 30yo, about 5'8" and weigh
9st at the moment).

All of this is relevant when/if I ever get pregnant again!! TTC DD2 was quite epic: 2 years and 6 cycles of Clomid. I'm still quite emotionally scarred from that. I don't think I could 'actively ttc' again, but that is a discussion for another thread! :)

[MolotovCocktail]

Bump!

[Beatrixpotty]

Just had 3rd ELCS.DSs are 3.5,2 and 6 weeks.DS1 at pre-school,DS2 nursery 2 days per week.After this ELCS DH was off for 3 weeks and did everything for the older DCs.I rested and looked after the baby.By 3 weeks I was feeling 90% normal ,managing on my own during the day and started driving,lifting toddler ,doing some bedtimes again.At 4 weeks I took them all to a party on my own and could manage walks to the park with double buggy.I'm breastfeeding and cope with the tiredness & having to get up early with the older 2 by going to bed early.I've got a nanny one day per week which is helpful but to be honest I would manage ok if I didn't..Body-wise,no stretch marks ,scar is looking better than after 2nd ELCS,slight muffin top but not overhang,at 6 weeks I'm back into some normal jeans but have also bought a couple of cheap pairs in a size up.Body does not seem too ravaged by 3 pregnancies.No chance of me doing any gym or swimming due to childcare logistics and bf but I'm pretty active out & about with buggy etc..If you are 5'8 and 9 stone you must be in pretty good shape so chances are a 3rd pregnancy wouldn't do too much damage!I wouldn't worry too much,I've had a positive experience and am nearly 10 years older than you.

[MolotovCocktail]

Thanks for your reply Beatrix, it's very much appreciated :) Congratulations on your new baby, too!

So by my maths, there's about 18m between your first 2 boys - am I right? What was it like having pregnancies and then your CSs with that short-ish gap?

My labour was long with dd1 and she was an assisted delivery,
resulting in a tailbone injury (from hours of pushing) for me and an episiotomy. My ELCS with dd2 was hands down a better birth: calmer and very straightforward, however, not "easy" in terms of recovery. I'd love to be able to just breathe a baby out, but there you go!

I guess I didn't like how weak, vulnerable and slow I felt for about 3 weeks (probably 10 weeks in total). I mean, I was up and walking around the very next day, taking short walks 2 weeks later, driving at 5 weeks but I'm used to racing around - even more so now I have 2 children. Although babies are very reliant upon you, my 4.2yo knows how much she needs me - even aged 3.2 last year she missed me whilst I was in hospital and missed me picking her up, chasing her, that sort of thing.

Also, I waited for a 2nd pregnancy or 2 years, then carried the baby for 9 months, then another 3 months before I really felt like 'me' again. I'm back to my pre-pregnancy body now, I'm enjoying it and would say that I have been back this way for about 6m now. I think a lot of what holds me back is the worry of what toll will be taken on my body. It's pretty much gone back to normal after 2 pregnancies and a CS without any visible after-effects of a CS (other than the external scar,
which looks very neat, I have to say). I feel quite lucky (don't know if that's the right word?) I'm not a gym-goer, either: it's been eating
carefully (during and post-pregnancy), lots of walking (to/back from school) and dashing around after 2 small children!

I'm not sure if we'll stick at 2, but then I'm not sure if I'm ready to have another try just yet! I think I think too much I'd like at least a 2yr, no more than 5yr age gap between DD2 and a DC3, so there's time. And I couldn't ever actively TTC again: any more children would be an unplanned-planned baby, IYSWIM!

Thanks again for taking the time to reply.

[shelley72]

i have been (rather vainly) thinking about this too.

i have had a VB, ELCS and now have to decide in next few weeks whether to have a VBAC or another CS. i recovered quite well from the CS last time round like you molotov just a small scar which is now almost invisible, no overhang and was smaller than i had been pre preg - though i did have various other body issues which i hated - saggy boobs and tummy skin .

just wondering if three years on i would be so lucky again or whether another section would do lots of damage. its not the most important factor of course but i dont fancy being ripped to shreds down below as happened first time either!

[MolotovCocktail]

Shelley, I guess that your age, how many years there are between your DC2 and DC3 and how well you heal should be taken into consideration. How many weeks along are you now? What happened during your VB?

Personally, I found the wound on my tummy much more tolerable to deal with than the perineal wound I sustained first time, physically and psychologically speaking. But like I said in a previous post, I'd love to be able to just breathe a baby out with not even a 'scratch', as they say!

As someone very wise once said to me here on MN: "There's no easy wayto have a baby."

[shelley72]

i wrote a really long post last night, hit post and it disappeared!

well i am 40 now [eek] and so i guess that will go against me healing-wise. there will be just over 3 years between sections if thats what i end up with. DC2 was ELCS due to presentation.

i have to say that i found recovery (both physically and emotionally) from the section far easier than my first VB. it took me 4 hours to push DS out and i ended up with a third degree tear and 2 hrs in theatre being stitched. it took me months and months to recover physically actually i am amazed that DC2 ever came along, and i have never really got over missing the first part of his life.

anyway i am now 30wks pg and have about 6 wks left to decide what to do. the vbac doesnt sound particularly attractive (quite medicalised) but if someone could guarantee a straight forward, intervention free active birth with no tearing then i would definitely go for it. but of course, they cant! just as they cant guarantee that i would have a 'good' CS experience with a fab surgeon and a sympathetic anaesthetist who would let me have skin to skin straight away.

difficult to know what to do for the best. its not easy this childbirth lark is it

[MolotovCocktail]

It's an old thread, I know but it's also a new year and lately the thought of another baby isn't very far from my mind.

So, stories of 2nd time ELCS are most welcome and shelley72, if you can read this and don't mind saying, how did your second ELCS go?

[MolotovCocktail]

Apologies, I assumed you had gone for the ELCS If you had the ELCS, how was it? How are you? Of course, I am interested if you opted for VBAC, too

[plentyofsoap]

I had my section in oct. My first was due to presentation, but this time I requested it.
First was fine, but it was alot worse this time round. I had scar tissue which caused things to get complicated and I lost alot of blood. Very bad bruising after plus an infection.
I would still make the same decision though.