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Second (or more) timers

(7 Posts)
MyNameIsAnAnagram Tue 09-Apr-13 09:47:24

if you wrote birth preferences first time round which went mostly out of the window, did you bother second time round?

I was hoping for a fairly intervention free waterbirth, and ended up with constant monitoring and a ventouse. Am totally happy with how it went anyway tbh, but I would like to try again for the waterbirth if possible. However, I will go with the flow again and see, I've very much got a what will be, will be attitude. Just wondering if I should bother writing any birth preferences or not really. I'm 35 weeks so ought to do it soon really if I'm going to.

Notmyidea Tue 09-Apr-13 09:56:25

I didn't with my second, and regreted it because it was all so much more straightforward. Being prepared to go with the flow is a healthy attitude, but no harm in stating your hopes, too!

birdofthenorth Tue 09-Apr-13 10:17:13

Expecting DC2 by induction tomorrow and nope, no birth preferences. I have told DH to continue to remind me I don't want an episiotomy if possible -I readily agreed last time when my big baby was stuck but it took months to heal- but I can't see the point in writing that down- never seen any medic or mw refer to a birth plan in the heat of the moment! Aside from that one stipulation I am very much in the "see how it's going" camp. I've never really understood how you can make decisions about how you will feel in wholly unpredictable circumstances.

FloppyRhubarb Wed 10-Apr-13 14:18:54

This is exactly what I have been wondering! I was the same as you first time around - hoping for a waterbirth and as little intervention as possible, but when it came to it my waters broke and my contractions stopped so it was onto the drip after a few days of hanging around in the hospital and then I slowly climbed all of the pain relief methods from the tens machine all the way up to an epidural and all of the possible interventions (episiotomy, ventouse and foreceps), narrowly escaping a c-section.
I still have that first hopeful birth plan and ideally would love to try for a waterbirth again but really am of the mind that what needs to happen should happen. The only thing I would insist on this time would be delayed cord clamping and cutting for my baby.
So I suppose I should revise the plan and ad that as a must at the end? Is that what you would do in your situation, as well as clueing in your birth partner on your non-negotiable (if possible) wishes?

MyNameIsAnAnagram Wed 10-Apr-13 14:51:49

I have decided to write down some non-negotioables at the top - no formula without consent and if required administered with srynge, no diamorphine - I think they are the only two, DH is well aware of those. Then a few preferences underneath that, ie dh cutting the cord (didn't get to do that last time), delayed cord clamping (didn't get to do that last time, he needed paediatritian attention), immediate skin on skin with dh to do if I cant (didn't get to do that last time see last point), etc. It will be very short I think.

festive Wed 10-Apr-13 15:08:47

I haven't yet, am also 35 weeks. Have consultant appt in one weeks time so might put down a few things after that.
Don't think I wrote anything down the first time though - other than repeatedly telling the medical staff I wanted the baby out as quickly and safely as possible and no forceps if at all avoidable.
Had quite a traumatic time the first time so my plan might just involve writing down all the things I don't want to happen again this time!

CuppaSarah Fri 12-Apr-13 16:55:57

MyNameIsAnAnagram I could write the exact same as you for my birth experience, literally word for word thats how it went for me. You must let me know how your labour goes and how you go about it. I'd quite like to aim for a water birth next time too, but now sure if I'll end up wanting it once contractions kick in. So I'm dead curious to see how you go.

Either way I hope you get an nice easy labour and a lovely healthy baby.

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