Having wobbles about homebirth

[ghoulelocks]

I'm bounced through previous pregnancy and most of this, aside from nausea, so homebirth seemed like a great option. However at 30 weeks the nausea went crazy and I've been in hospital twice for dehydration/ kidney infection/ vomiting/ tachycardia. I don't even feel like I have the energy now to organise the bits I need, let alone do it.

Has anyone else felt like this? I've been referred and swapped teams but I'm having a wobble. I can't decide if I'm run down this week or being in hospital has knocked my confidence.

I just need to talk it out I think, but 5min midwives don't seem to be the place where I can.

[McLurkin]

Poor you - sounds like a scary and horrible time with the hospital visits.

Where was your last birth? And what were the reasons you decided on hb in the first place?

I planned hb first time, transferred to hospital labour ward. second time knew I didn't want to deal with the mess (new house!) so opted for birth centre. was absolutely the right decision for me but I felt weirdly guilty about not trying for a hb again. not sure why.

There are always so many things to weigh up. it is tricky. Anyone else you can talk out loud to and try and work out what will be right for you?

[ghoulelocks]

Sorry to be nosey, but why did you transfer?

I thought a home birth would be good:
-I labour slowly, I hoped it would remove some time pressure
-I didn'tlike being alone at the hospital
-I had a pretty stress free run last time
-I hate the idea of travelling in labour

[McLurkin]

Transferred because the mw said to me "it'll be at least another six hours" and I thought in that case I want an epidural because I'm at the limit of what I can take. dd was born les than an hour later...

Sounds like hb would still suit you then. Is there someone else you can delegate some of the organisation to? And can you give yourself a day or two's grace maybe to just not think about it, sleep on it, care for yourself and then return to the decision when you are feeling in a bit better spirits?

[leannac]

My midwife has told me that if I even half think I can & want to do a homebirth that I should just book it in as if I change my mind after 1 contraction & decide I want hospital/birth centre birth then we can just transfer with no problems. Whereas once you've booked in for hospital you've reduced your options.
Good luck you poor thing. Sounds like a hard time

[Chunkychicken]

I gave birth to my DS (DC#2) at home 13days ago and cannot recommend it highly enough. However, I didn't have the worrying time you've had.

The pros of hb; lack of travel during labour (good job too - I went from 4cm to baby in less than 1.5hrs), comfortable surroundings to labour in, 2 MW (or in my case, 3) all to yourself, comfy bed to get back into, food & drink whenever you want, able to labour & deliver where & how I wanted, much calmer & relaxed time.

Cons; have lots of washing to do, have to clear up after yourself if you make a mess in the bathroom (although, to be fair, I'd have done this in hospital but without the benefit of cleaning materials), you're left 'home alone' very quickly after, so no support on tap if you encounter problems - although they give you emergency phone numbers.

Overall, I credit my home birth with the easy start to breastfeeding, less trauma during birth, quicker reduction in bleeding, far less "baby blues" compared to my DD, and the great relationship my DD has with DS. I have felt physically better, far less tired and uncomfortable after this birth than my DD, so its possible that, despite how you feel now, you might actually feel fitter/more energetic after a home birth.

I agree with leannac though, why not try for a hb but if you change your mind, you can take yourself off to hospital. However, if you decide to transfer after the MW arrives, you will need to wait for the next available ambulance (unless its urgent).

Ultimately only you can decide how you feel.

[YouSeveredHead]

Just book a home birth anyway you can change your mind when ever you like. Traveling in labour isn't easy no however you've got the option open to you.

[Ushy]

May be the wobble should be explored a bit. Your last pregnancy was straightforward and this one has had a few problems -tachycardia etc etc. There's nothing wrong with rethinking your decision in this case, circumstances have changed and its reasonable to think it through again.

This isn't a competition - don't feel pressured. I would discuss this with a midwife and possibly a consultant and get all the info you can then make whatever decision you feel is right for both of you.

Good luck xxx

[ghoulelocks]

Thanks all, still wobbling here. If you transfer though can it be to a MLU, or must it be labour ward?

[PipCarrier]

Hi Ghoule
Yes you can transfer to MLU if they can take you.
I wobbled too with my planned hb of dc2.
Pregnancy wasn't quite as smooth, felt dreadful from week 24 onwards and had low platelets which had the mw's wobbling too about letting me have a hb.
However, all went as planned and good job too as labour was so quick I wouldn't have made it to hospital.
It was the most incredible birth and the absolute best thing was being run a bath afterwards and getting back in my own bed.
As someone else said I'm sure the hb was one of the reasons I felt much more amazing afterwards and no baby blues like with dc1.
Good luck whatever you decide.