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techniques to cope with things you would rather not be happening

(11 Posts)
peanutdream Tue 27-Sep-11 11:04:28

anyone used any particular techniques - relaxation type of thing / hypnobirthing, to cope with scenarios in labour that they don't necessarily want to happen?

am having a vbac, planning to refuse monitoring if everything is going well and i feel like it at the time, but consultant has put the wind up me this morning with lots of 'we'll be inducing you at 41 weeks' (er, no you won't) and you'll be monitored (er, no i won't) so am just wondering if anyone knows of any good websites or books that offer techniques for staying 'in the zone' to optimise hormonal flow as it were... rather than getting swept up in the whole 'let's medically manage this labour' attitude of various medical staff...

any ideas/experience welcome - am 34 weeks and pregnancy has been fine so far and am healthy etc so low risk except for the blardy scar!?

Withwoman Tue 27-Sep-11 11:29:00

Remember you are the one in control. You do the 'allowing' If you want the midwife you use a sonicaid to listen in rather than a CTG then tell her that.

Best advice is not to go in until your labour is established. ie 3-4 regular (and I mean regular ie lasting 45-60seconds) contractions in 10 minutes. You will probably be advised to go in as soon as things get going, but you don't have to follow that advise if you feel things are going ok as they are.

In fact you have the right to a homebirth if that is what you choose.

scepticalexpat Tue 27-Sep-11 15:19:16

I'm 34 weeks too and have some of the same concerns as you - ie how to stay in the right frame of mind that might help your body progress in labour.

I read Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth. It's more hippie and hardcore natural childbirth than I'm planning to go (if it all gets too much I'm going to ask for an epidural), but nevertheless she has quite a few suggestions that seem helpful. She says it's all about feeling relaxed and trusting your body and letting go, and talks about the usefulness of physical affection from your partner (all the way from being held to more sexual stuff), laughing, vocalising, relaxing your jaw, and helping yourself to believe that your body really can do this seemingly impossible thing. There's also a bit on embracing your 'monkey self' that I quite like!

Other things I've read seem to suggest that water, moving and changing positions and vocalising (whether grunting or singing) are your most powerful tools to stay relaxed and manage the pain.

There's been quite a lot on Mumsnet too about hypnobirthing CDs, which lots of people seem to have found helpful - it's not really my scene, and I'm going to spend the money on a birthing ball instead, but I have been thinking up some relaxing scenes I can visualise and affirmative sentences to repeat.

Will be interesting to see if anyone else has suggestions - this is my first birth and I'm still looking for ideas...

lollystix Tue 27-Sep-11 17:02:52

I did waterbirth (intermittent monitoring) and natal hypno prep (listened to the cd) for vbac 2 and it was a much calmer experience than vbac1

FormbyDoula Tue 27-Sep-11 17:52:23

I had twins and wanted to avoid the medically managed labour. What really helped me was making sure the consultant knew exactly what I wanted/didn't want, getting him to agree to it and speaking to as many other midwives and docs that I could (eg by going to visit the labour ward beforehand), in the weeks running up to my due date. I also wrote a very detailed birth plan.

What about hiring a doula? She could make sure you don't get 'bothered' during the birth. You have to be quite strong to resist the interventions, and even being asked about EFM etc can take you out of 'the zone' and disrupt things. Especially if they start giving you scare stories, but as long as you are firm in your mind what you want, you just say no. Ask them not to bother you unless absolutely necessary. Good luck!

peanutdream Tue 27-Sep-11 20:00:52

thanks all. any particular hypno cd lollystix? FormbyDoula, I have thought about getting a doula - my yoga teacher for DS1 is one and I thought she was wonderful and I do credit her with the positive outlook I have about birth 1 despite it being an emcs as we felt very in control even though DS's presentation meant an emcs was necessary - but money is just too tight.

scepticalexpat I love Ina May Gaskin so that's done too grin. I guess I just hope that this baby is in a good position and labour progresses well so that when I refuse the monitoring etc they aren't TOO bothered

peanutdream Tue 27-Sep-11 20:21:50

just found the hypno thread. very interesting.

lollystix Tue 27-Sep-11 20:47:51

Yes the maggie Howells one - purple - natal hypnotherapy.

BadDayAtTheOrifice Tue 27-Sep-11 20:48:47

Why don't you arrange a meeting with a Supervisor of Midwives to discuss what you will and won't consent to and under what circumstances.
Midwives are required to follow hospital policies one of which is to continually monitor VBACs. If a plan has been agreed beforehand thats in writing from a supervisor then it removes any potential conflict at the time and doesn't rely on you having to fight your corner while your concentrating on labour.

ALotToTakeIn Wed 28-Sep-11 20:06:52

I have hired a doula for exactly this reason. She and I have discussed the birth plan at length and she is very clear on how I feel about various interventions. I don't feel confident enough to try a homebirth as I live a way from the hospital and would like the security of having Drs and drugs there IF i need them but am aiming for as natural a birth as my pain tolerance and bump will allow. DH and I feel so much calmer about the whole birth knowing she will be with us to stop people rushing/scaring us into interventions that may or may not be necessary.

peanutdream Fri 30-Sep-11 21:20:22

thanks lollystix

consultant has written on my notes, doesn't want monitoring. am hoping that i am going to be well dilated when i get there so we can just get on with it! husband knows all about this so am relying on him - he was very good during DC1s birth, questioning every intervention... i just can't help get involved iyswim as i am involved in the labour... someone just sat on a ball and lifted a finger during contractions lol which i might try, while ignoring everything else... and i might use the hypno techniques to try and keep relaxed about it all...

thanks for all the tips grin

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