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Hoping for no2 but frightened of birth...2nd experiences wanted please

(11 Posts)
LaCiccolina Wed 14-Sep-11 12:17:58

I return to work at 2012. I think I'd like to return pregnant with no2. I'm scared tho. I ended up with an induction for a medical reason. It was 3 days before I was finally moved into the labour room. All in all it was for me a terrifying experience. My hospital mat department was then in the press for 6mths because of bad practice, as now still being resolved (generally although not specifically my story, and yes they really did deserve to be vilified, it was pretty shocking there). I was so grateful to end up a cesarean section I cannot tell you.

I'm very keen to have a c sec again. Is anyone knowledgeable whether this is poss? Can I push for that option? Would I be listened to? Ive breast fed so i feel ive done my "its best done this way" effort. It would be the same hospital. I'm just hoping they've improved.

I know how to heal and cope this way and I'm frankly scared of natural/induced now. They seemed much more competent once things went surgical you see. It was whilst I was being induced that they made the experience bad. My pregnancy was great. I know all births are different. Logically it all makes sense but Im still scared and Im now working myself up a bit which is silly. Ive made a GP app to see what they say but any thoughts or experiences others have might help?

Boosaphena Wed 14-Sep-11 17:12:01

I had a horrendous induction 1st time, resulted in forceps after 3 days horrible horrible horrible. 3rd degree tear. My second I was offered an elcs but declined and opted for a home waterbirth. Lovely serene experience that was spontaneous and swift. Still resulted in 3 rd degree tear. sad
Now am booked in for elcs in 2 weeks. Really looking forward to it. At 20 ish weeks a reg tried to talk me out of it, said I could maybe 'give it a go' hmmmm when I spoke to my actual consultant he was adamant elcs. I think it's quite common at 1st apt they try and talk you out of it then if your still insistent and convinced at 30 odd weeks they allow it.
Good luck. I hope that helps. 2nd time I was so scared but it was actually fine.

Mummawummadooda Wed 14-Sep-11 18:40:41

Gosh so pleased to hear this I cannot tell you! I might sleep tonight. I've felt so silly but it's terrifying me. Good to hear yr on 3rd so it's not silly to want a baby but still b nervous!!!

Boosaphena Wed 14-Sep-11 23:17:15

I think it's normal after a first difficult labour/pg to be nervous-you have nothing to compare it to. But genuinely all labours are very different.

MummyGemx Sat 17-Sep-11 21:12:05

I had a really long drawn out delivery first time after bring induced and swore to myself during labour I could never do it again! However, I have just had my third and am pleased to say that second time I went into labour naturally and had a pretty good labour and third time was induced but was alot quicker (4 hours from induction to birth) and overall a good labour experience. Remember your body has done it before second time round so that must help.

Its normal to be anxious and I think it is generally more scarey second time round because you actually know what to expect. x

MJHASLEFTTHEBUILDING Sat 17-Sep-11 21:14:05

Message withdrawn

MummyGemx Sat 17-Sep-11 21:21:09

Just a thought - do you have another choice of hospital in your area? I am lucky enough to live close to two maternity departments so had a choice.

Also I gave birth all three times in the same maternity department but had to say my experiences were generally excellent although when I was induced for my third, they were very busy and under staffed and it did show in the care I recieved as I barely saw a midwife until the last 10 minutes of my labour and when I did was told I was only in the early stages when I knew I was close to giving birth. Subsequently, I only just got to labour ward and baby was born imediately. Luckily I then had a fantastic midwife whom had just arrived on shift. My point being you may have a very different experience in the same hospital second time round especially if issues have been highlighted and they are working to improve them.

x

notasausage Mon 19-Sep-11 16:08:08

First birth traumatic massive pph, stitches, surgery and long labour prior to that.

Just had second- induced for post term but it was much faster than first natural labour - just under 2 hours. Even though I had to be monitored throughout and ended up on the bed rather than the active labour I wanted it was much better and I could fault the hospital. Ime the hospital protocol insisted on continuous monitoring by a midwife once my waters were broken and I was not left for more than a few mintues once I was on the drip. Was a bit scared going into it but I think that's natural when you know what to expect especially when first time was traumatic. But it also means you know that you'll recover, that you have a lovely baby and you're more likely to speak up if you think the care you're gating isn't up to scratch.

Davsmum Tue 20-Sep-11 12:43:54

I was really frightened during my 2nd pregnancy because my first birth was horrible. Waters broke but no contractions, and was put on a drip to get the contractions going. In the end I was there for over 2 days and had a forceps delivery, by which time I was on another planet !
The 2nd birth was totally different - felt contractions at 5 pm - got to hospital for 7 pm and gave birth at midnight. It all went smoothly - it was painful but it was an experience I would have been happy to do all over again ! ( sadly - I never did !)

Catsycat Tue 20-Sep-11 13:22:29

I had a horrid first birth too, an exhausting 3 day induction with rude and insulting comments thrown in, and lots of pain, followed by an EMCS. Second time, I pushed for VBAC, went to a different hospital and had a good experience there, but still ended up with an EMCS. However, second time it really put many of the ghosts of the first birth to rest, felt like it was my choice, and not being "done to" me IYSWIM. I had a Doula too, which helped keep it all calm. Now pg with #3 (just), and will opt for ELCS.

In my (not enormous) experience, as you had a previous CS, I wouldn't expect you to have a problem getting an ELCS this time, if that is what you want. This was the same for all my friends who had CS. It was VBAC I felt was seen as more of a problem by some medical professionals. I know it isn't possible for everyone, but where we are is equal distance (40-45 min drive) to hospitals in 3 different PCTs. I had a good talk on the phone to one of the senior mws at the hospital I eventually went to with DD2 before deciding to change hospitals, she was very helpful and answered all my concerns and questions, and the atmosphere was so different there. Even going to the town where DD1 was born (not even the hospital) gave me a panic attack 3 years after the birth!!!

Mummawummadooda Fri 23-Sep-11 17:22:22

So happy to see all these. Going thru same myself and this chain hs really helped x

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