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ignore me if this sounds weird, but do you sometimes wish you could do your labour again with the benefit of hindsight?..(9 Posts)
ive had 2 inductions now, completely NOT my ideal scenario, and with ds1 i had pethedine and g&a, they broke my waters and gave me the oxytocin drip, so i was pretty strapped down and attached to things urrgh. of course, with your first you don't know whats going on and you let stuff happen to you because 'the midwife knows best'.
with ds2 i knew they would induce me when i went a week over and my blood pressure was high, so i was determined to do it as 'my way' as possible. i walked the legs off myself in the days leading up to the induction with the hopes of avoiding it, and when i finally went in they said i had started labour (yay!) but they still wanted to move it along due to the high BP so kept me in and did the pessary. now the effect that had, as i was already in early labour, was to super-charge my contractions - i mean they went from 0-60 in no time at all, it was seriously painful. BUT, my cervix wasn't dilating. i spent the best part of a day with dire contractions and no cm dilation - gutted. i WISH i had had the guts to say to them that i refuse the induction and would labour at home as it was already started. also, because of my
stubborness determination to do things my way and au naturale, i didnt want any pain relief except g&a... mistake #2 or what! i was seriously stressed because i was all too aware of the pain and the situation - pethidine would have enabled me to relax myself and my muscles. double urrggh. mistake #3 is that when he was born poor ds2 ingested a load of my blood, which we didnt realise until later. when they first handed him to me i noticed that his mouth was bubbling and he was slightly struggling to breathe, i mentioned it but they said he was fine. (i think they were more concerned with patching up my wrecked hoo-haa). consequently ds2 has had frequent trouble with stomach acid/reflux/a constantly phlemy chest... all because i didn't speak up grrrr and urrghhh!
my conclusion is that next time i will do things 'better', which sounds weird and has my dh very worried! but i almost want to do it all again a third time because i think, this time, i can do it right.
sorry, im very tired and this has turned into something of an essay.
any similar stories, i'd be interested to hear them!
Ah the sweet benefit of hindsight!
Don't beat yourself up about it! Hey- you didn't drug your baby- that's something to be proud of!
And your team should have picked up on your baby having problems breathing, it's not not your fault that you didn't pester them to do their job!
I've got a list as long as my arm of things I've learned from my first labour and am determined that 2nd will be better. But may need 4-5 shots at it before everthing goes as smoothly as I'd like!
4-5 shots at it?!? good on ya! its such a learning curve isn't it. i'm hoping it gets better each time.
I wish I hadn't taken the pethedine shot. It made the room spin like a hangover from hell. Horrible stuff.
I'm trying to learn more before the delivery this time and more about the options I'll be given.
Hindsight is always fabulous. I wouldn't beat myself up over what happened. Nothing ever goes to plan in childbirth but learnig from the previous experience is always a positive.
I wouldn't like to do previous labours again but have definitely picked up a few things along the way.
With 3 previous labours I have gone into hosp at 4cm dilated with good strong contractions but after a few hours of these (which I'm coping with) I have only progressed to 4& a half cm.
Previous MWs have suggested epidural at this stage as it looks like I may be in for a long haul. All 3 MWs broke waters at this point. And that is what makes labour worse for me. the pains feel too sharp & meconium has been present hence I go from walking the pain off to being strapped down & feeling the need for gas and air.
This time I want to keep going au naturelle for as long as I feel is right without ARM. The CMWs I spoke to seem to have different opinions on this; one of them says go for it as there's no way of knowing how much difference this will make unless I try. The other one was pretty negative & said that the MWs have to push to break my waters & can't leave ms indefinitely failing to progress. She says I should "write a short birth plan but don't write so much that it will piss people off." FWIW I am pretty laid back about childbirth & have never written a plan or been demanding.
I am so very glad she will not be present at the birth! Sorry for wandering off topic OP!
I'm not having Pethidine ever again. Felt drunk, sick and it didn't ease the pain at all. I'm planning on aleast trying to move into different positions this time round too. MW last time tried to get me to move around but by the time anyone suggested this I refused to move at all as the Pethidine had made me feel soooooo ill.
I've only done it once, I thought I knew lots about childbirth (I obssesed about it) planned a hb, etc. ended up being induced, meconium, no freedom, epidural and cs...
I'm trying to come to terms with it, and find myself wanting to do it all again just to try and di it 'right'. I feel awful about that because we didn't want anymore children...
I had a short sharp labour with dc2. So painful and shocking I used that as ammunition next time round, and persuaded doctor that I couldn't cope with a very precipitate labour/risk of giving birth in car.
So with dc3 and dc4 I was induced and with dc4 I had the epidural sited BEFORE the induction began. I felt confident enough fourth time round to say 'I don't want any bloody medals I want to be in control and enjoy this'.
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