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Childbirth

Silly things people say when your pregnant due to have baby.......

82 replies

Scruffyhound · 02/04/2011 09:04

I was speaking to my DP the other day and the baby is due next Friday (8th April). Im having a strech and sweep on Tuesday and have not had one before. So I told him that its at 9.45am and that if things did get moving then to be ready to move and we would have to sort out a lift for my son from school and chilcare.
He then said well "are we guarenteed a baby on Tuesday?"
I would not mind but I spent 10 mins explaining that it might not work and I had not read much positive feedback for this procedure. I dont have a crystal ball.......
What stilly/stupid things have people said to you?!

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Scruffyhound · 02/04/2011 09:05

Not to mention annoying text messages one after the other is the baby here yet? We will text you when we have had the baby?!!

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clouiseg · 02/04/2011 12:34

"god your bump is huge"!

YES I KNOWWWWWWW!!!

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Cyclebump · 02/04/2011 12:43

'Wow! Aren't you frightened of the birth, [insert name of random person/relative] had an awful time. She had a squillion hour labour then tore/had a c-section/nearly died!'

'Reusable nappies?! You'll never manage, might as well give up now.'

'Any news?' [This for the billionth time after you've already promised to text/ring at the first sign of anything happening]

Oh so helpful Hmm My EDD is 4 April.

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Jemma1111 · 02/04/2011 12:50

I'd gone for a scan with my partner and we both wanted to know the sex of our baby, however the radiographer said she couldn't say as she wasn't sure

To this my partner replied "can you give us an idea what you think it is, like a 50/50 guess?"

duh Blush

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lucielooo · 02/04/2011 14:56

Wow you're huge for 4 weeks to go (man on train)

Ahh, you're having a boy. Did you want a boy?

Though I quite like the 'is the baby here yet ones' but then, I still have a week till I'm due so perhaps that'll wear off!!

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Gemjar · 02/04/2011 15:07

I got a lot of, "isn't he here yet?" ok so I did go 2 weeks over with both DS's, but if he was here do you not think that there would be, I don't know, A BABY! ffs of course he isn't here yet.

Cyclebump - sorry but i would probably be one of the ones warning you against reusables, but then I have a potty training toddler and a vomity newborn at the moment and i'm not sure that there would actually be enough hours in the day to fit more washing in Grin

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architien · 02/04/2011 15:22

From MIL "Surely this will be your last" it's my second.

Man in a hotel lobby queue when I was pregnant with my first "Wow you're big" whilst almost prodding my bump.

When asking the doorman directions for the easy access door to a large department store when heavily pregnant with my second, alone with my toddler (19 mths) in a pushchair and I have SPD so having trouble with lifting the pushchair up the few steps. The reply was "But you're not disabled..."

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orangehead · 02/04/2011 15:30

Ds1 was born in Jan. In the october random woman who worked in supermarket 'how long have you got?' 'January' I say. Her mouth dropped and she said 'no way will you last till january, if you do you will look like the back end of a bus' Thanks for that.

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Backinthebox · 02/04/2011 15:33

architien - and the correct answer to that kind of question is "I know - I'm just pregnant and, hurray! will not be pregnant for much longer. Sadly for you, you will be ignorant forever though." This answer also works for anyone who says "aren't you fat!"

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Shuv66 · 02/04/2011 17:11

If one more person tells me to have curry and sex!!!! Amazed that complete strangers are happy to give you sex advice, at least my GP on Friday had the courtesy to use the phrase "have a romantic evening with your husband"

Am due 15th April but had labour start at 33 weeks which hospital stopped but was advised to expect DD to arrive early, here I am 5 weeks later and still waiting. My DS came at 36 weeks so feeling pretty fed up! Hmm

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StoneBaby · 02/04/2011 18:43

My favourite:
Are you sure you're not expecting twins?
Me: Yes I am
The same person: You know if there are 2, they will see 2 heartbeats.

WTF, I was 35 weeks at the times and had about 5 scans!!!

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FreudianSlippery · 02/04/2011 18:46

In my second pregnancy the bump was MASSIVE and from about 6 months I was getting loads of the "ooh you look ready to drop" and "baby must be coming very soon" etc.

I felt so paranoid that I was so huge (and was in loads of pain) but I did feel pretty vindicated when DS was born at 11lb14oz :o

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Pregnantwhale · 02/04/2011 21:16

My mum: "Is anything happening down there yet?"

Me: "Er, no, nothing is happening 'down there'"

I found this really annoying. Along with a random person who tried to guess the sex of the baby based on the shape of my bump. Oh, and numerous people who every time I speak to them ask me if anything is 'happening' yet. Try to contain myself - want to say 'no f**k off, if I was in labour and I think this is what you are implying, then I wouldn't be having a conversation with you!'

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Morebounceperounce · 02/04/2011 22:05

Friend of DH's, admittedly slightly pissed, grabs my 34 week bump, gives it a shake and says 'what's this then?'.

That would be my unborn baby Sherlock and if you try that again I'll rip your arm off and beat you to death with it.

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Scruffyhound · 02/04/2011 22:07

Well those all made me laugh. I loved the 50/50 thing it was great!! Hoping it would bring on labour before anymore comments like the above ones are said to me on Monday when I drop off my DS at school.

"anything happened" Happened WTF?? Yes it did I had the baby and with my ex pregnancy brain forgot to bring baby with me just my 5 yr old.......

Silly amounts of text messages "any news?" Yep the news is piss off Im turning my phone off because Im grouchy, massive (as I have been told sooo many times now) and not had much sleep.

I said earlier I was tired up at 7.00am with contractions and up several times in the night also for several wees. Im now tired shock horror very grouchy been with 5yr old all day playing board games making pictures.... Im wiped out. Answer off DP "well at least you slept all night". WTF like that is going to make me feel better. Im fooking exhausted!! Carrying around all this extra weight that people keep telling me about is a "bit tiring". Sorry that utrned into a rant rather than something funny!!

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MatchsticksForMyEyes · 02/04/2011 22:11

When I was about 7 months pregnant with DS one of the Y8 girls came up to me and said " Have you had your baby yet, Miss?" Confused

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anonandlikeit · 02/04/2011 22:11

haven't you had that yet?

Yes i left it at home... just ate loads of pies!

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Scruffyhound · 02/04/2011 22:17

The next time someone say anything and I dont know them Im going to say Im fat they will shut up and leave me alone?!

Some random roadworker said "I hope we dont make you have your baby before its due?!" How the hell are they going to do that? I did concider knicking the drill and drilling see if it pushed the baby down?! Anyone tried that? Grin

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bringinghomethebacon · 02/04/2011 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cheapFlower · 05/04/2011 22:25

MIL (and some other stupid people) said about a trillion times: "hopefully it is a boy this time" (DC1 is a girl - the bump was another girl as well :o )

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Pootletrinket · 06/04/2011 08:07

Am glad I'm not the only one with insensitive ILS "we'll have a boy this time, please" and "can you sort it so it's a boy" and "no more pink bundles please" - firstly "fuck off, by the time we're telling you we're PG, it's already decided", secondly "it's your precious son/brother's contribution that determines that" and thirdly "I'd really really like a girl, not least to shut you all up"

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vallinnapod · 07/04/2011 19:29

I have had that pause when randoms ask you the sex and (in my case) you say boy...then the "So is that good?"

I've had the "it could be twins" (admittedly it is IVF but I have had 10 scans (am only 18+5) so we are pretty sure it's just one....)

On hearing I am pregnant, "Are you excited?" I am so tempted to answer "No, devastated" then have a minor breakdown on them Wink

Oh and my favourite "You should/shouldn't be doing/eating...." F* off!! My life, my body, my much longed for baby. Like I would do anything stupid to jeopardise this PG, at the same time I am not going to wrap myself in bubblewrap and live like a hermit...ohhh Blush rant over!!

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frida75 · 07/04/2011 19:48

I'm feeling paranoid about the size of my bump, every bloody person I speak to comments on how massive I am (or how fat I've got depending on how rude the person is) Even my mum quips 'are you sure its not twins/you'll never last another 8 weeks' It's driving me mad - to the point of actually lying about how many weeks I've got left just to shut them up!

I've become obsessed with the size of other pregnant bumps I see to try and compare, I think it's coz I'm dead short and the only direction it can go is out! Plus this is baby number 3 and I kinda already had the 'bag' for it ti fall in to iyswim!!

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Scruffyhound · 07/04/2011 21:13

I was at the school today picking up my DS. There is me and one other lady (she is a week behind me). Were both looking ready to pop. We have been talking to each other as I had a stretch and sweep the other day and so did she. So chatting minding our own buisness. This woman walks past and says
"you two look like a pair of bookends" I dont even know the woman and neither did the lady I was talking to. Who the f**k does she think she is saying stuff like that? We both looked at each other as if to say that was not funny and your a bitch!!! Must be the hormones.

Then 2 seconds later a random woman said to the other lady I was talking to
"ooowww you cant have long now your ready to burst!" I thought she knew that lady she said she did not and looked pissed off!!! So its quite funny to see another pregnant woman thinking the same as me you can telll by her face!! Made us both laugh anyways!!! But people are so rude and think its ok to comment about stuff. If I see a bald person I dont say "oowww maybe one day it will grow back" and then find out they are on chemo or something its just rude to say anything like that to a person you dont know but when your pregnant anyone can say anything it seems? I have never said anything to other pregnant women like that ever! I did tell my close cousin who had IVF and a struggle that she was growing well and looked amazing for it had a glow about her. But I ment that in a nice way and I knew her very very well and knew how much the pregnancy ment to her but random people NO!!

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saldoozer · 08/04/2011 09:19

In my last few weeks at work people started telling me I was starting to waddle. It really wasn't what I wanted to hear as I was/am finding the physical restrictions of being pregnant to be not comfotable at all. I mean who wants to be told they are not walking normally!Angry
Oh and a collegue who one morning in the changing room said "your ginormous" I wasn't really only about 32 weeks with quite a neat bump.

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