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Live webchat with Lucinda Fell from Childnet, Tues 9 Feb, 1-2pm

(70 Posts)
GeraldineMumsnet (MNHQ) Mon 08-Feb-10 16:20:24

Welcome to our new child internet safety forum.

To kick off, we're welcoming Lucinda Fell from Childnet International, who's coming on for a webchat tomorrow, Tues 9 Feb (Safer Internet Day 2010) between 1-2pm.

If you've got any concerns about what your children are up to online, for eg whether they're safe on social networking sites, and what you should be doing to ensure they ARE safe, then please join the discussion.

Lucinda is Childnet's policy and communications manager. She's a member of the UK Council for Child Internet Safety and a member of the European Commission Social Networking Taskforce.

As the chat is tomorrow, Lucinda won't be able to do any advance answers, but she'll do her best to get through as many questions as possible during the chat. Hope you can make it.


somebodiesmum Tue 09-Feb-10 20:06:46

Have contacted NCMEC, so hopefully will hear something from them, not sure if it will do any good but I need to do something.

creditcrunched Tue 09-Feb-10 17:29:18

somebodiesmum - if I were you I would recontact ncmec and ask for an update. Email the CEO personally and ask what more can be done in the US to get the photos of your daughter removed.
Do you know which company in the USA is hosting the images? you could contact their CEO as well.

somebodiesmum Tue 09-Feb-10 15:20:42

Thanks will look at that properly after, just going out to parents night

Rhubarb Tue 09-Feb-10 15:09:42

This might be useful to you.

I would contact the FBI in the US and inform them of the material that is still online of a minor.

somebodiesmum Tue 09-Feb-10 15:02:46

When IWF contacted me they aked for my details and if it was ok to pass it onto the NCMEC who will deal with it on their side, but as of yet I have heard nothing. Its coming up for a year now since this happened and although she may have moved on from it I haven't, I'm more paranoid about things, I check her phone constantly, I read every email she recieves even though the account that was accessed has been closed, she doesn't get on the internet unless I'm in the room, I have parental controls on the main pc and none of them get on my laptop. The laptop that this was done on has been returned to her dads. I dont know what else I can do

Rhubarb Tue 09-Feb-10 14:44:46

I'm so so sorry for you, what you and your dd must be going through is dreadful. No doubt she feels guilty and ashamed. sad

It just goes to show how little protection our children have as far as the internet goes. I just read that they have arrested the guy who illegally downloaded the Playstation 3 game or something similar. Yet they are unable to act over illegal pornographic images involving a child? Do the UK police not have any contact with the US child protection dept then?

I am just so angry for you.

GeraldineMumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 09-Feb-10 14:39:27

Sorry to butt in, just wanted to let you know that Lucinda says she'll try to come back and post replies to a few more questions by Friday.

somebodiesmum Tue 09-Feb-10 14:31:43

When she started acting suspicious around the laptop her dad bought her I took it off her, I found some shocking stuff on it and contacted the child protection helpline. The police came out but with in a week the case was closed and they said she had done this herself.
Then a month later the police came back because CEOPS had contacted them as you tube had contacted them about the images of my daughter. When they new that the case had been dealt with they left and that was that.
My daughter is now attending Chidren 1st for conselling but she wont talk about it, its like she has blanked it out.
It's heartbreaking because this is something I cant fix for her or make it go away, the images/videos are always gonna be there, whether they are took down from the site or not some one has copies. I feel sick at what shes gone through, but more helpless than anything else.

LeninGrad Tue 09-Feb-10 14:20:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Rhubarb Tue 09-Feb-10 14:16:52

I still do not understand how the police can be aware of pornographic images up online of a child and be unable to have those images removed. No doubt they are being hosted by someone.

I cannot believe that no-one can do anything about this.

If that were my dd I would be beside myself, as you must be. These images are being hosted by a site and that site should be shut down. The bloody internet thinks it's above the law now. They make it so easy for children to be targeted and then so hard for the authorities to track down those paedos and remove offensive and illegal content.

Users downloading illegal musical content have their houses raided and their internet connection removed. Yet images of a naked child are allowed to stay???? This has actually made my blood boil.

LucindaFell Tue 09-Feb-10 14:15:53

Thank you all for taking part in this chat today. We’ve ended on quite a dark note, but I would like to encourage you all not to pull the plug on the Internet. It does offer many positive opportunities for children and young people and there are lots of tools available to help you navigate your and your child’s internet journey safely and enjoyably. Child Abuse Images can be reported to the IWF as has been pointed out, but their jurisdiction only covers content hosted in the UK. You can also report suspected grooming to the Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre (CEOP). Do check our and sites for more tips about staying safe, and advice for parents too. For more details on the new UKCCIS code launched today go to and remember to Click Clever, Click Safe!

Hulababy Tue 09-Feb-10 14:11:14

somebodiesmum - that is awful. Your poor DD

I dont really understand why children of 10 or 11 need social networking sites TBH.

My 7y does like Club Penguin, but as a game, not for talking to other people online.

I think introducing children to FB and giving them their own accounts could be a slipperly slope.

creditcrunched Tue 09-Feb-10 14:09:19

somebodiesmum - the blocking is done by isps, so if you can still access the images then it means that your isp is not signed up with the IWF.
You should also complain to your isp. Why are they not blocking like the other 95% of the isp market is?
Take your business away from them as well, they are profiting from you paying to get internet access and yet they are not protecting your daughter.

flashharriet Tue 09-Feb-10 14:06:36

Thank you very much for coming in to talk to us Lucinda - I'm going to go and have a read through all the links you've posted smile

somebodiesmum Tue 09-Feb-10 14:04:24

The p;olice told me that they couldn't have the content removed, I contacted the IWF and they said the site was hosted in America but would be able to block 95% of the UK from seeing it but unfortunaltely it didnt block my area. The police did then phone me and say that the images had been rmoved but when I checked late they were still there. They said they had no case because she looked older than 11 and it ooked like she had inticed them hmm but shr doesnt look older than 11 shes still in age 9-10 clothes

Rhubarb Tue 09-Feb-10 14:03:51

somebodiesmum - you sound like you did all you could to protect her. You have not failed your dd, but the internet and police have. How can an 11yo entice adults into abuse???? I don't care how old she looks - she's 11 ffs and they have a duty of care!

Makes you wonder why you bother paying your council tax.

All you can do is ban the internet and let them join the homework club of the local library if they need internet access.

LucindaFell Tue 09-Feb-10 14:03:05

Hi somebodiesmum, I'm so sorry to hear that. We've timed out now, but as this is such a personal case, do please feel free to call the Childnet office to talk about it and we can provide you with the other support and advice on this topic that we and other government agencies have issued.

Rhubarb Tue 09-Feb-10 14:01:00

OMG that is awful! Why can't you get the content taken down? I'm becoming more and more convinced that the internet is a dark and dangerous place for children and I will never ever leave mine alone with the internet.

It just makes it easier for paedos to target young children - they don't have to hang around outside schools anymore, they just log onto a networking site. It's far too easy to join a site such as Penguin Club and CBBC pretending to be a child. I'm of the view that there shouldn't even BE chatrooms for children.

Again, the pressure needs to be taken off schools and parents and directed towards the web designers who are producing these sites.

creditcrunched Tue 09-Feb-10 13:58:25

lucinda - you can't be saying that Club Penguin is a suitable alternative to Facebook for the 11 and 12 year old secondary school pupil...can you????

LucindaFell Tue 09-Feb-10 13:58:24

Hi flashharriet, this is something that we hear a lot. This can be tough for parents, especially when other households have adopted different rules – or lack thereof! One of the things that we have recognised is that we can’t stop risk – but we can equip children and young people to deal with these online risks. The Government’s code launched today is a significant step forward. We’ve seen the government, internet industry and third-sector partners like ourselves agree this new simple message – and it is the collective intention, that much like the green cross code, this will be easy for families to remember and will start to become an ingrained part of thinking. We would also expect to see schools and clubs etc. pick these messages up and share them too. From September 2011, the new primary curriculum will mean that all children from the age of five must be taught about how to use technology safely and responsibly – so the pressure on parents will ease as it is incorporated into the curriculum.

somebodiesmum Tue 09-Feb-10 13:57:50

Sorry hit post too quick

What could I have done differently? If anything

somebodiesmum Tue 09-Feb-10 13:56:50

My daughter was unlucky to be targeted by some one on line, there are videos of her semi naked doing things to herself on the net still. The police say she enticed these people to do it as they would find it hard to prove she was only 11 when it happened. She was sent some pretty disgusting images and they asked her for more videos/images of herself. I never allowed her to have the laptop out the living room, but she still managed to do it. They asked her where she stayed and if she could go someplce with them. She is now undergoing councelling but wont talk about it. I thought I had protected her from things like this but instad I let them in my house.

GeraldineMumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 09-Feb-10 13:54:55

Quick reminder that webchat ends at 2pm. Thanks to everybody who has taken part

flashharriet Tue 09-Feb-10 13:47:17

And totally agree with Rhubarb - everything to do with the internet for kids appears to be down to me to police. Why can the Govt not meet us halfway on this and make our lives a little easier?

LucindaFell Tue 09-Feb-10 13:46:02

Hi morningpaper, thank you for your question. I think we've covered some of this in my previous post, but we think that the first thing that all parents can do in helping to protect their children online is to be interested in what they’re doing online and to start by asking the type of questions you raised – so that’s a great start We have a fun and interactive website at with all sorts of advice for children on how to stay safe online. You might like to start by looking at that website together, look at some of the videos of top tips from other young people and think together how they might be relevant to what your daughter will be doing online. It’s useful from the start to have simple rules in place about both of your expectations and for her to know that she can come to you if she sees something that upsets or worries her.

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