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Instagram for 11yr olds

(32 Posts)
Notyourusual1 Sun 23-Mar-14 09:12:30

Would you let your 11 yr old set up an Instagram account? I have spoken to a few other mums who have, without any misgivings. DS insists all his friends have and he is the odd one out. What age did your DCs set up an account?

McPheezingMyButtOff Sun 23-Mar-14 09:15:55

No.

Not.a.fecking.chance

DottyDot Sun 23-Mar-14 09:22:02

Yes ds1 asked if he could have an account when he started at secondary school as all his friends have one. I said yes as long as he 'friended' me so I could keep an eye... He agreed and so far so good. He knows the kind of thing he's allowed to post and if he posted anything outside this, I'd make him pull his account.

I'm seeing it as practice for Facebook which I know he'll want when he's 13 and the same rules will apply..!

DottyDot Sun 23-Mar-14 09:24:43

And actually it's quite sweet seeing who comments on his photos (nearly all of his cat!) as he's a real introvert who doesn't tend to have friends round and has struggled a bit to make friends at secondary school, so I like seeing who are his friends on Instagram - some are at his new school so it gives me hope that at least he's getting to know some people!

Applespearsorangesandlemons Sun 23-Mar-14 09:31:15

Not a hope. I have already disabled an account one of mine set up behind my back. There has been a lot of nastiness and upset being caused around Instagram in year 6 and it's being used similarly to Facebook where there are children being really horrible to one another. Most children in the year do have it, mine don't and after the initial complaints are quite happy not to be exposed to the comments.

Notyourusual1 Sun 23-Mar-14 11:31:18

Positive experience then Dot. DS would need to friend me too. I already have the password to his phone, so he's familiar with me checking his messages. So far no problems and we have a fairly good, open relationship. He is one of the "in" kids in school so can understand why wants the account. But he's also sensible and mature for his age and we've had the discussion about online dangers. McPhee, why are you so against it? Interested to know

Notyourusual1 Sun 23-Mar-14 11:33:14

Apples, really sorry about your child's experience. This is something I was afraid of. I know how bitchy and horrible kids can get at this age.

hashtagwhatever Sun 23-Mar-14 11:41:34

Yes dd has one.

She has her settings set to private and I am also on her list she isn't allowed to add anyone without asking me first and I can see if she has. I think its fine aslong as the rules are followed. Id rather she has this than Facebook

Notyourusual1 Sun 23-Mar-14 12:25:05

My thoughts exactly hashtag.

DottyDot Sun 23-Mar-14 12:45:11

Yes I have access to ds's phone and ipod touch whenever I want and he's not allowed to download any apps or open anything like Instagram without asking first. These are the rules while I pay for stuff and so far goes unchallenged! I want to encourage him to communicate in any way possible as he generally finds it difficult, so it's all good from my perspective, as long as there are checks and balances in place.

gilhug86 Tue 15-Apr-14 12:56:17

My daughter has Instagram and have had no problems with it. She lives taking photos editing them and sharing with her friends and family. Her account is private and she asks my permission before accepting a new follower. I have the password for it so she knows I can log in at anytime on my phone to check what's happening and so far so good. All positive so far it helps her with her hobby and keeps her connected to friends from her old school. Facebook is a huge no no at the minute but she has proven herself to be mature enough to deal with social networking/photo sharing.

merryNath88 Mon 30-Jun-14 10:19:30

I would definitely allow a 11-years-old girl to use Instagram. I am deeply convinced that at this age one has the full right to decide on media consumption.

Lesshastemorespeed Mon 30-Jun-14 10:30:28

Interested to see what the general consensus is as I have said no to dd(10).

merry I disagree. I'm sure some 11yr olds might be savvy enough to make such a decision, but I think most would struggle to comprehend the implications of a putting a photo 'out there' that they then can't retract or remove.

My general thought is that 11 year olds are too young for all social media. Why do they need it?

SDRyan Wed 20-Aug-14 11:55:11

DSD has one [Instagram]. I wasn't keen on the idea of her using social media, at least not Facebook or Twitter and advised my DW against it. DW in the end agreed to Instagram, when she asked again a few months later and we discussed it. DW checks her account it sometimes. Actually, DSD is more than happy to show off her account to us (at the moment anyway) without even being asked. When she set it up, it was a chance to teach her about password security, which had been very poor in the past, and now she knows better about how to come up with a secure but easy to remember password.

ikkenu Wed 24-Sep-14 12:02:56

After much pestering I agreed to set up a trial account for DD that I could monitor, with just a couple of friends as contacts. I'm horrified by what I see and am regretting it already.

There is a '13' age limit for a reason. I even wonder if it should be 16 like whatsap. One of the few friends DD is testing this out with has a public account linked to a load of strangers, because apparently it is 'cool' to acquire as many followers as possible. Some are companies pushing their products; many appear to be older (male and female) teenagers who swear a lot. I don't see it to be appropriate for an 11 year old to see inappropriate material posted by teenagers, e.g. referencing self-harm, anorexia, guns/violence, nudity, drugs, etc. - and I saw examples after checking just three or four 'followers'/'following'. Then there may be others who are targeting the web to make contact with children... While most other children may have set their posts to private, if they comment on a public post their username and comment can also be seen by everyone. The only way round this is to make sure (a) you are 100% sure you know who you are linked to and (b) you do not follow or are not followed by anyone who has a public account. You can test that by googling their username but I doubt children will be rigorous about this.

But then, profile and biography details are all public ieven if posts are private. I'm literally shocked by the number of children who have not only uploaded a picture of themselves to their profile - sometimes in school uniform! - but have included their full name, form group(!), names of friends, school and where they live.

To be honest, there's also a danger even if you're not on Instagram of your friend mentioning your child's name, the fact that she goes to the same school she's mentioned in her profile, where they'll all be at 3pm on Saturday. The biggest danger really is other people's children.

Mummyamy123 Thu 27-Nov-14 16:07:09

No, my niece and her friends caused chaos with Instagram. Police got involved and guess who got the blame.......yes that's right the parents for allowing it......xx

lawn Sun 28-Jun-15 15:31:35

My 11-year-old DD took herself off instagram for a while but is now back on. I have friended her and she is only allowed to be friends with people she knows in real life.

lawn Sun 28-Jun-15 15:31:35

My 11-year-old DD took herself off instagram for a while but is now back on. I have friended her and she is only allowed to be friends with people she knows in real life.

TheFirstOfHerName Sun 28-Jun-15 15:54:08

Both the younger two (nearly 11) have an instagram account. These were the conditions:
- they have to let me know the current password.
- they do not give their password to anyone else (even best friend).
- they know that I will be checking the account regularly (both accounts are accessible from my phone).
- they have the account set to private not public.
- they only accept follow requests from family and real-life friends.
- they only upload photos they would be happy for their grandparents or head teacher to see.
- the only comments they write are positive ones.

So far they have kept to all of these conditions. Because instagram is quite limited compared to facebook, it's a good 'nursery slope' for learning to use social media. As they are still so young, I check their accounts daily: they and their friends only post harmless trivial inanity.

About 75% of their school friends are on it. It is useful for sharing plans for social meet-ups (they DM each other about going to the park after school) and will be useful for staying in touch when they all split up to go to half a dozen different secondary schools in September.

lawn Sun 28-Jun-15 15:57:34

(Apologies - sent too soon. To continuesmile What I hadn't banked on was the danger of hashtags. Just one example, there's a hashtag called "ebony" which the kids have heard about - they then search it and up comes a load of hardcore porn. One of DD's friends did this out of curiosity, and DD was pretty freaked by what she saw. If your kids are on Instagram, I recommend checking their hashtag search history as well as following them - although in this case, only the parents of the girl whose device was used for the search would have found anything amiss.

lawn Sun 28-Jun-15 15:58:09

Gah. Accidental smiley in the last post.

radha888 Fri 03-Jul-15 15:53:27

To be honest,

radha888 Fri 03-Jul-15 15:57:35

Sorry press the bottom by mistake! As I was saying I wouldn't really allow my children to use Facebook or Instagram it's just not a safe place for children on the internet

titchy Fri 03-Jul-15 16:07:51

Google's far worse imo......

titchy Fri 03-Jul-15 16:09:36

The major major advantage of letting them have an account earlier than you'd like is that they're happy for you to have their password so you can check. Better than them setting up an account you know nothing about....

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