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ADHD - Advice Please(5 Posts)
My dd is intelligent and attends a very good girls grammar school.
But yesterday, one of her teachers apparently made what I can only assume was a flippant comment to dd about her having adhd because she is constantly fidgeting. This has preyed somewhat on my mind because I know dd does fidget a lot. But she will read several chapters of one book in one sitting and can focus on other things such as minecraft. She is quick to anger and can fly off the handle, later realising that perhaps she overacted she also has some difficulties being organized and can quite often forget things. The trouble is because she is doing so well at school (CATS scores were all above average) it is difficult to work out whether it is just a growing up/pre-teen thing (she is a young 11) or whether she actually does have some elements of adhd and therefore a diagnosis wouldn't be clear. As well as organization skills the only other thing that lets her down is her spelling (but not her creativity) and I don't know if this is in anyway connected. She seems hooked into screens - constantly checking her phone for example but I don't know whether this is an age related thing, I don't really see other children of her own age so it is difficult to compare. Up until recently she has had an extreme fear of dying (but this seems to have calmed down a lot since starting secondary school) These issues have been noticeable for the past few years but because it hasn't affected her school work, I haven't really seen any reason to act, though I did approach my GP about her dying phobia but it wasn't really taken seriously and as I say has faded now. But I suppose the teacher making this comment yesterday, however flippant has got me thinking again. Any thoughts?
Well my dd was quiet, placid, high achieving, awful writing, never quite fulfilled her potential, never really got her head down with homework but could focus for hours on interests/screens. It intensified at 15 when the anxiety, depression, not eating started, and the self harm. After 10 months of anti depressants and therapy she was diagnosed with ADHD ADD variant. It was the root of all the troubles and looking back, oh goodness, why didn't we see it. A diagnosis has been transformational so I would take your concerns further
Sadly you probably won't get any support via the NHS. My dd got nada, zilch, zero and she had moments of crisis and wanted help.
You will have to pay for a private diagnosis if you can but I would say It's worth every single penny.
Should have added the problems intensified as work ratcheted up in yr10. Her GCSE results were all A/A* butnfewer A* than predicted. Once diagnosed (and she lost a year due to impact on mh overall retaking yr 12) her A'Level results were all above 97%! If she hadn't cared she'd have been fine I guess.
If she is happy and doing well does it actually matter? What exactly are you expecting to get out if a diagnosis. Her disorganisation is something that you can work on without a diagnosis. As for the spelling I suspect that she may just write in full words rather than letter by better (if you jbumle up the oder of ltetrs in wrdos lvaenig the fsrit and lsat ltetrs in tiher palces, msot popele can sitll read it without iusse. Mnay do not eevn ntocie). You risk burdening her with a SN diagnosis for no reason.
Thank you for your interesting responses. Raindrops, I am going to keep a watchful eye and see how things progress and I am relieved to hear that you managed to gain support for your dd, I will certainly monitor closely. Ttbb, yes, I see your way of thinking and believe it is too early to act. I am hoping these issues will smooth out over time, thankfully the fear of dying phobia seems to have eased some of the other issues might do likewise but I suppose I am concerned about her mental health having had some issues myself.
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